Swan Song ~ Shadow & Bone

6

The morning of the Winter Fete, I was surprised when Genya rushed into my room. I had been awake for nearly an hour, woken up by yet another nightmare. This one had been about my brother, as they always were, but in this it was nearly impossible to tell what was gone. I couldn't see much. I could hear voices, but the most prominent thing I noticed was the unmistakable sound of Volcra in the distance. Once I woke up, I quickly wrote down what I could remember before it slipped from my mind.

"Genya?" I asked when she barged in. "What are you doing here? I thought you were supposed to be with Alina." She smiled softly.

"I have a little over an hour before I need to go to Alina," she told me, "which gives me plenty of time to help you." I scoffed.

"Are you saying I don't know how to do my own hair and makeup?" I asked incredulously, but a playful smile rested on my face. She grinned.

"You wear the same style every day, and the last time you tried to change it, we had to cut most of it off. I think it's safe to say you need me." I laughed.

"Why do I have to look fancy?" I asked her. "My normal hair is perfectly fine, and you know I despise a lot of makeup." She smiled and pulled me off of the bed, sitting me down at the mirror.

"I won't do a lot of makeup, don't worry. But I will never forgive myself if you miss the chance to catch the eye of a handsome man–or beautiful woman–because I didn't help you stand out." I chuckled.

"I'm a bloody Inferni with no spark," I muttered, "and the lieutenant to the Black General. I think I stand out plenty." She smiled at me in the mirror as she opened her case.

"Trust me, I know. And you're plenty beautiful on your own. Sometimes you make me wish I was into women. I'm just here to get people to notice you so they can see how beautiful you are too." I smiled and thanked her, and before long my hair had been styled. She had kept her word and used minimal makeup, only enhancing the features I already had, but soon she had to see to Alina, leaving me to wander the halls.

It wasn't often that I got the chance to simply walk by myself. Don't get me wrong, I loved walking with Kirigan. Or Hadley or Jeliah or Genya. But being by myself gave me a chance to think about things I didn't let myself remember when I wasn't alone.

No one else at the Little Palace knew about where I had come from or the brother that I had left behind. No one but me, Kirigan, and Ivan, who had been the one to find me. And thus they were the only ones I ever talked to about it. Even around them, however, I didn't talk about it much. It wasn't something I wanted to relive, despite never wanting to forget it either.

I was so caught up in my thoughts that I almost didn't notice the guards at the end of the hall, one of them limping away. Almost.

I frowned and followed after them. I stayed hidden as I watched them, and my frown deepened when the man had to stop, wincing and taking the weight off of his leg as the girl placed a hand on his shoulder comfortingly. The man shook his head, and the two turned a corner. I heard footsteps approaching from behind me and quickly turned and smiled as I saw the Durast and Corporalki that had been assigned to protect Alina and Marie for the night. I nodded as they passed, and they did the same in return. Once they had rounded the corner, I sighed and paced the hall, eventually stopping to lean back on the wall as I waited.

Eventually I heard uneven footsteps approaching and looked towards the end of the hall to see the guards from before, who stopped when they noticed me. I pushed myself off the wall and walked towards them, slowly and carefully. My eyes never left the man's, and he stared right back at me. Only when I was right in front of him did either of us speak.

"Is it really you?" I asked quietly. I wouldn't have been surprised if he hadn't heard me, but when he took a deep breath I knew he had. He hesitated. "Kaz?" The girl looked up at him as he gulped and nodded.

"Katya?" he whispered. I nodded a bit, and he looked down at the girl beside him, whispering something in her ear. She glanced at me, frowning a bit, before nodding and walking away. I let out a quiet breath of relief as she left, reaching up shakily to rest a hand on one of his cheeks. I knew I had recognized those eyes. I would recognize them anywhere.

"My little brother." His eyes became glossy with tears, and he quickly reached up, his hand on top of mine.

"By two minutes." He pulled me closer, and I wrapped my arms around his neck, burying my face in them as he hugged me tightly. The tears that I had held back for nearly ten years finally escaped my eyes as I held on to him. "I thought I was never going to see you again." I sniffled quietly as he rubbed my back.

"Me too." When we eventually pulled away, I led him down the halls to a small, hidden alcove that I often found myself at. There was a wider ledge on the window, letting us both sit down, which meant Kaz could rest his leg for at least a moment.

"When they took you," he said after a while, "I was so... angry. We had already lost father and Jordie. I told myself I wouldn't lose you too, that I would protect you." He shook his head. "I wasn't ready to lose you." I looked over at him.

"There was nothing you could've done, Kaz," I told him. "If I had been able to control it, they never would've found out and we could've gone back to Ketterdam together. We would still be together." I sighed. "But there's nothing we can change now." He looked down and nodded, and I leaned back against the window frame. "Anyway... what are you doing here?" He looked up at me and shrugged. "Don't give me that. I know you didn't cross Kerch, Ravka, and the Fold just to find me." I sighed. "You're on a job, aren't you?" He clenched his jaw and looked out the window, still refusing to answer me. "You're after Alina." He glanced at me, then back outside. "You can't take her. I won't let you." He looked over at me quickly.

"Do you think we're going to hurt her?" he asked. He shook his head. "Of course, you never did trust me." I shook my head sadly.

"I did. I do. Nothing ever happened that told me I shouldn't." My gaze hardened as I watched him. "But Alina is my friend. And if you take her, that is not something I can just look past." He pushed himself off of the window with some difficulty and limped across the hall.

"You don't understand, Kat." I stared at him in disbelief and stood up, crossing my arms.

"I don't understand?" I scoffed. "I lived this life with you for six years. I was there when you got your name, when you broke your leg. I went through countless jobs with you that had the ability to change our lives. Just tell me what it is that I supposedly don't understand." He shook his head and looked over at me, sighing.

"This job isn't just a job," he said. "It's revenge against Pekka Rollins." I froze.

"Pekka..?" He nodded. "You stole this job from Pekka bloody Rollins, is that what I'm hearing?" Another nod, but he said nothing. "So you're planning on kidnapping my Sun Summoner and friend... for revenge?!" He gulped.

"The prize is a million kruge," he told me. "With this, I could buy my way across the Fold, I could come here." He shook his head. "We wouldn't have to be separated ever again, Kat, just imagine it!" I sighed and ran a hand down my face, being careful not to mess up Genya's work.

"And the cost is one of the only people who has ever had even an idea of what this life has been like for me." I shook my hand and brushed off my kefta. "Kaz, I... I recommend you leave. Before I have to make you." I started to leave, but his voice stopped me.

"And if I don't?" he asked. "What will you do then?" I gritted my teeth and spun around, glaring at him.

"Something that we will both regret!!" Kaz flinched away from me, looking down at my hands. I glanced down to see them both enveloped in the white flames I was so familiar with. I clenched my fists, extinguishing the flames as I breathed heavily. I gulped and looked up at him. "Get out of here, Kaz." I gritted my teeth. "I don't want to fight you, I never have. But if it means protecting Alina and the future of Grisha, don't you dare think that I won't."

and the tea has been spilt

big things happening this chapter