hysteria ( eddie munson x steve harrington)

17. you and i were fireworks

when steve was a kid he loved the fourth of july, he would've even gone as far as to say it was one of his favorite holidays. eddie had planned a whole night for them, they had already gone to dinner which eddie paid for even though steve insisted he didn't have to.

eddie said it was him returning the favor, for all the things steve had done for him. they were almost matching, eddie insisted they shouldn't wear the traditional red white and blue because of just how much eddie hated the political side of it. he was doing this for steve, since he had told eddie endless stories about how excited he always was to watch the fireworks.

there was only one issue and one that steve hoped wouldn't be a problem, and that was the memory of last year. he couldn't get the feeling off of his chest, that something terribly wrong was going to happen. lucas tried to use them to kill the mindflayer and steve just knew deep down that horrible feeling would come creeping back.

it wasn't yet dark enough for the full show to begin in downtown hawkins, and the stores were nearly dead so eddie insisted they go by their own fireworks while they still can. steve stayed in the car because he was still a little worried about people seeing them together, but every day he was getting closer to being okay with letting the whole world know. he thought he would be okay, until he heard the first one. it was like something in his chest exploded right when the firework did, and suddenly he felt like he couldn't breath. steve looked anxiously around the car trying to ground himself but it was no use. he was prone to small panic attacks when it came to loud noises, but this? this made him spiral into something he hadn't felt since last july.

he felt downright pathetic, something he learned he feels a lot more than he ever would've expected. he held his face and cried so hard he felt like he was going to choke on the air he was breathing. they were heartbreaking choked out sobs, he wished the feeling would go away but he was too scared to think of anything else. when the drivers side door opened he heard eddie's muffled voice, saying something about the store being busy. then the sound of the bag being dropped in the back seat, and eddie sounded afraid now.

"stevie? baby look at me please, what happened?"

he pleaded with him but steve wouldn't budge, the anxiety building up in his head made him feel like if he reached out to him that eddie would suddenly disappear. he felt himself get pulled into eddie's arms, taking in the sweet reassuring words he was being told as best as he could.

"see i knew i shouldn't have left you alone, did someone hurt you? i'll actually kill someone this time"

steve wanted to laugh at that because it was a little funny given the circumstances of how they met, but he just couldn't stop the crying. he was barely able to choke out "n-no one did...fuck...scared of fireworks"

and at that, eddie looked probably the most confused he ever had.

"you said you loved them?"

it wasn't in a judgmental way, he just genuinely wanted to know what caused such a dramatic shift. he caressed steve's face, wiping away his tears as he did.

"last year...it happened today l-last year"

when he finally got it out all steve could do was cry even harder because he was afraid eddie would make fun of him. when he told his parents not to light any for new years, they accepted his request but not without a hundred questions as to why. he really didn't feel like going through all of that again.

"oh..steve, shit i didn't even think about that. it's alright, you'll be fine won't you big boy?"

steve finally laughed at the stupid little nickname that he remembered so fondly. he looked up at eddie with tear stained eyes, and yet he still looked happy.

"you haven't called me that since...since"

despite feeling better he still couldn't finish his sentences, but eddie understood. "i know, alright let's get you home pretty boy"

he didn't deny that, and sat calmly in his seat almost the whole way to his house. but at every snap in the sky he jumped like he was watching the scariest horror movie ever. eddie still didnt make fun of him, he knew this was genuine fear that couldn't be avoided.

when they got to his house he pulled steve into his back yard, handing him a lighter and a small firework that wouldn't do much besides spark a few inches into the air.

"no eddie i can't, i can't do it" steve tried to shove the other boys hands away but he just grabbed onto them, holding both of his hands.

"you can, i believe in you. i want to replace those memories with ones that make you feel safe again"

as much as he was afraid to do so, he trusted eddie. so he put the firework on the ground, carefully lightning it and as soon as it sparked he ran back into his boyfriends arms. the fear was building up inside him slowly, but once he saw that it really wasn't all that bad he calmed down.

"see? it's alright baby, long as i've got you i won't let anything hurt you, okay?" he kissed steve's forehead causing steve to smile the most he had all night. it still was uneasy for him to hear the loud booming noises above him, but he was getting better. he clinged onto eddie's side, happy to be spending the night with the person he trusted the most.

"you just sounded so happy when you talked about it before, i never even thought to think about last year.."

he sounded guilty almost but steve shushed him, putting a finger to his lips as he watched the sky in awe. eddie leaned in to kiss steve's cheek just as he had turned his face, making their lips accidentally meet. all of the panic steve felt earlier that night left his body as he kissed eddie, it was the most calming feeling in the world. and if he had to be honest, how could he be afraid of fireworks when he felt them every time he kissed eddie?

/i'll get back to the concert chapter after this but it's the 4th and someone requested this so here you go !!

/i lost  one second of my life every time i had to type the word "firework" in this