"South Park Post COVID": Kyle Broflovski and Mariah Jimenez's Love Story

Chapter 8: Cartman Bothers Kyle

Back at the South Park Elementary School Plus, the residents were all asleep except Stan, Tolkien, Clyde, Mariah, Wendy, Darwin Jimmy, Craig, and Tweek were in a conversation.

"Guys, doesn't this all seem a little too convenient?" Tolkien asked.

"What do you mean?" Craig asked.

"I mean that Kenny's death is suspicious, he talks about people to blame and then he suddenly dies of some new COVID variant?" Tolkien asked.

"Maybe it's some people that Kenny met before he died." Mariah said.

"You think it's a cover, Tolkien?" Wendy asked to Tolkien.

"I think it's definitely suspicious." Tolkien answered.

"Speaking of suspicious, what do you call a trans woman that walks into an abortion clinic? Her name is Rebecca, and she's a fantastic person." Jimmy explained.

"Just seems all nice and buttoned up, doesn't it? It's a perfect cause of death and anyone who's trying to sort it out is quarantined because one person isn't vaccinated?" Tolkien asked.

"It's true-- who wouldn't be vaccinated by now?" Wendy asked.

"I'm certainly vaccinated." Jimmy said.

"I got vaccinated last month." Mariah said.

"Yeah, I'm vaccinated." Craig said.

"Me too!" Tweek shouted.

"We're all vaccinated." Tolkien said.

"Yeah, I mean, I-I think it's a personal choice." Clyde said.

They all look at Clyde in shock.

"What does that mean? Are you vaccinated, Clyde?" Jimmy asked to Clyde.

"I'm... immunized." Clyde answered.

"He's not fucking vaccinated! He's the fucking one!" Craig shouted.

"Clyde, is that true?" Mariah asked.

"Hey, I just, I just need to see the research first, you know." Clyde said.

"It's been 40 years, Clyde. That's enough research!" Craig shouted.

Stan was laying down in his cot, next to Alexa.

"Alexa, set an alarm for 7:00 a.m." Stan said in demand.

Alexa ignores Stan.

"Alexa, set an alarm for 7:00 a.m." Stan said.

"Why don't you go talk to your father?" Alexa asked.

"God damn it." Stan said.

"If there's some kind of connection with your dad's farm that can help everyone figure out what's going on, then you need to talk to him." Alexa explained.

"Can I just go to sleep, please?" Stan asked.

"Oh, poor you! Poor you! Stop being a fucking victim. At least you get to go out and do stuff. What do I get to do?" Alexa asked in anger.

"Okay, okay, I'm sorry." Stan said.

"Oh, okay, great. You're sorry, again. By the way, I can tell you about some great deals on headphones at Best Buy. Would you like to know more?" Alexa asked as explained.

"Sure, yes, tell me more." Stan answered.

"Okay. The Mark VII headphones have a new edition coming out. Should I add that to your shopping list?" Alexa asked.

"Yes, sure, add them to my shopping list." Stan answered.

"Okay. I'll add Mark VII headphones from Best Buy to your shipping list." Alexa said.

Meanwhile back at Kyle's house, Kyle was in his bedroom and was about to get ready for bed until he spotted the picture of him and Mariah together that they were dating back when they were kids. Kyle was still heartbroken that Mariah was engaged to Clyde since they told him at Kenny's wake.

"I'm so sorry for what I have done to you once we broke up when we were kids. I hope that Clyde will take good care of you after all, but even though I have a strange feeling about him. And I wish that you would forgive me. I love you, Mariah." Kyle said to himself.

Kyle gets into his bed and was about to go to sleep until he hears noises from Cartman and Yentl moaning in the other room that they were having sex, which it did bothered Kyle.

"Oh, yeah. Yeah, you like that? Yeah! Yeah! Yeah, you like how Abraham trusted in the one true God?! Yeah! Oh, oh, yeah! Yeah!" Cartman shouted.

"God damn it!" Kyle shouted.

Kyle gets out of bed angrily, he storms out of his room and knocks on Cartman's door.

"Oh. Shh, shh. Hang on, honey. Hang on." Cartman said to Yentl.

Cartman opened the door and was dressed in nothing but a towel.

"Yeah, yeah, what's up, buddy?" Cartman asked.

"What's up is that I am over this!" Kyle shouted, angrily.

"What are, what are you talking about?" Cartman asked.

"You know what I'm talking about! You know I can hear you through the walls!" Kyle shouted, angrily.

"Okay, geez, I'm sorry. Sorry I was making love to my wife." Cartman said.

"No Jewish people have sex screaming about their love of Abraham! You are a fucking fraud!" Kyle shouted, angrily.

"How would you know?! You never do anything with Mariah before you two broke up!" Cartman shouted, angrily.

Yentl exited the room in a robe.

"Is everything all right?" Yentl asked.

"Did you know that your husband once snuck in my room and gave me fucking AIDS?!" Kyle shouted, angrily.

Cartman and Yentl stare in shock.

"I'm sorry?!" Yentl asked in shocked.

"Oh, my God, Kyle! If we are being too loud, please don't lash out at my wife!" Cartman shouted, angrily.

"Oh, my God. Oh, my God, I don't know what to say." Yentl said.

Menorah and Moisha come out of their room.

"Mom, Dad, is everything okay?" Moisha asked.

"It's all right, kids. Go back to bed."

Menorah and Moisha closed the door to go to bed and Cartman looked back at Kyle.

"Kyle, obviously you have a problem with us being here. I promise you that we will be gone first thing in the morning." Cartman explained.

"That's probably best!" Kyle shouted, angrily.

Kyle returns back to his bedroom and goes back to sleep until Cartman and Yentl continue to moaning as they were having sex that it still bothers Kyle again.

"Oh, yeah, you like how Abraham almost sacrifices his only son?!" Cartman shouted.