Her Pacifier: Secrets From The Past

Prologue : The Beginning Of Our End

(For this chapter listen to "This Is The End" by FLØRA.)

Julian Hawk

"Faster, Jules!" she shrieks in my ears.

My blood boils and my pulse quickens.

When I tighten my grip on the leather steering wheel, another asteroid hits beside the passenger door on the ground, creating a chasm and triggering my awaken, kicking adrenaline.

I wince at the impact.

The sky is falling and the night's light is dying. Her breath pants in utmost horror as she continuously glances at the rearview mirror, observing a living nightmare. The outcome of our stargazing date night has become absolute ruins. Just by one simple mistake she commited, one simple temptation she fell for: sin. We're next in line to be irrevocably and completely ruined.

"Passion," I summon.

My left foot is shaking on the accelerator pedal, nonetheless I'm pressing on for dear life. Passion didn't hear my summon because fear had already summoned her.

"Passion!" I command.

She startles and turns to me with her green eyes as wide as saucers. We're both quivering in fright but unlike her - collapsing piece by piece like a house of cards in the raging wind - I'm more collected and composed.

"Did you take them?" I ask, cutting straight to the chase. I never was one to beat around the bush. "Did you take the pills?" I urge to clarify.

"Jules-"
She cuts off in a tremulous voice and withers like a dying tulip in her seat. Her enlarged orbs dart to the rearview mirror once again.

My nostrils flare at her hesitance.
"Answer my question, goddamnit!" I brawl.

"I did," Passion gasps, admitting her mistake, "I did before we left the dormitories."

Regrettably smacking my sweaty palm on the steering wheel and being driven sheerly by untamed rage, I later on notice the panic on Passion's pretty face. It not only from roaring at her but from the chasm I miraculously accomplished to swerve.

"Shit!" I curse.

I swiftly swerve another opening chasm, then another and my ears slowly succumb to Passion's screams chiming in with the screeching of her new installed black tires.
My brain loses all focus to her husky wails and fro the wheel. Passion's truck wields itself to the depths of the hole to the right, trapping a front tire in the process.

Double shit!

There is no escape.

"Jules, you're scaring me-" Passion's voice begins to break, "-you're scaring me," she repeats, sobbing.

"I'm scaring you?" I incredulously question.

Heaven forbid her absurd statement.

"I frighten you?" Splatters of spit soar to the dashboard as I shout and my manly arms toss in the air. I was once told by many people in my childhood that I appealed like those addicted psychos from rehabilitation centres who yelled, screamed and lashed out in anger for drugs when I was mad. Ironic isn't it? That I'm sitting across one and she's suddenly afraid of me.

"We are sooner or later going to die for what you've done and you're sitting here, crying your eyeballs out, telling me I scare you? What about me?" I pant, beginning to hyperventilate due to my shortness of breath, "I'm not terrified by all this happening? It's my fault it's raining asteroids and we're fucking stuck! That's what you're trying to say, right? You are the frightened one and I'm not."

"You know damn well that is not what I'm attempting to say," Passion hisses through her gritted teeth. Her sclera is red like sty, of the tears her eyes have rained. "This never would've happened if you didn't smack the wheel!" She accuses me.

"This never would've happened if you didn't take the pills!" I snap back.

I know I've wounded her accusing demeanour when her glossy lips pout then quiver.

"I- I- can't. I can't stand my addiction," she stammers, "but I didn't mean to, Jules. It was just one-"

"Now you've cost us our lives, Passion. By simply taking one dangerous pill, you've ended us," I sigh, raking my coal curls.

Passion vigorously shook her head in denial; brown elegant curls of her own bouncing along as she did. Her bewitching valley green eyes watered anew. I refuse to witness an eye-catching goddess - such as herself - cry, so I gaze up, through the destroyed roof of her truck, to vision the stars descending.

I never noticed how mesmerising the beauty of nature could be, how it could set you in a mystical trance to freeze and do nothing other than gaze dead on it. Neither did I notice or begin to imagine that in its astonishing beauty, it could condemn you to its danger.

It's raining meteorites, shooting stars, and blazing hot asteroids that burn into fireballs the second they crash the earth. Meteors from outer space pass through the five basic layers of the atmosphere surrounding my home, planet earth. The ionosphere, thermosphere, mesosphere, stratosphere and lastly troposphere. Heaven knows we're captured and held hostage by our doom since the asteroids have already hit the earth's surface. It's insane how hallucinogens make all this appeal so real. Our deaths included.

"Jules, look at me," Passion pleads.

I slowly turn to look at her, very slowly. When my black pebble eyes intertwine with her green ones, my head immediately aches and her eyes transition to a violet glittering hue.

She places her cold caramel hand on my pale white cheek and shivers instantly sprint down my spine. Not because of her chilled affection or the chill of the night but because of the grotesque truth we sadly must face.

The end of our story is finally beginning.

"Forgive me," Passion whispers, "grant me your forgiveness and I swear on my father's grave that I'll never do it again."

"So it's finally happening," I murmur.

"Wha-what is?" Passion whispers.

I wryly smile and whisper back, "Our fate. Our deaths. The beginning of our end." I nod as her purple eyes wander back and forth my stubble and stinging eyes, hoping that my bobbing head will make her understand. "This is our end, Passion," I finish.

"No, it's not, Jules. Listen to me. I'll never take those pills again." Passion sharply inhales, then her naked shoulders shudder as she cries. "Believe me. I shan't," she sobs, "never ever again."

I close the gap between our sauntering faces and tenderly kiss her speckled forehead with mine. She brushes her pink nose tip against my crooked one and trembles when I cup her wet, chubby cheeks with my veiny hands. My left foot is still pressing with all great might I possess on the accelerator pedal but that power soon diminishes with disappointment to the engine falling dead silent.

Passion's blue truck is now a ghost town.

"This is the end," I pronounce, solemnly yet serenely. The feel of my mouth caressing her lower lip evokes goosebumps on the surface of her silky smooth skin and her rosé scented breath hitches in astonishment of my unexpected affection. Passion gazes at me awaiting my affection…and then…slowly but surely...I kiss her.
Passionately. Like her name demands and the last seconds of our lives depend on it.

Our kiss was interrupted by the sudden asteroid - twice the size of her brother's motorcycle - that smashed the bonnet and ignited ombre flames on the fuel of her patriot blue Ram. We tumbled, illuminated and ablaze into a bottomless abyss of darkened nothingness.