Until We Meet Again

17. start over

We've already made a million memories that will be sure to last us forever.

In the last two weeks, we've spent a million hours in random theaters, cozy restaurants, and my dorm. We've gone to museums and enjoyed the cheesy talent shows that students at my school organize. I didn't know how freeing it would be to date Delilah. I also didn't know how expensive it would be. . .

I've been paying for the majority of our time together in places that cost money, with her blaming it on her forgetting her wallet and me wanting to do this for once. Back then, she was always the one giving me all these gifts and paying for so many of our fun trips close and far together.

It's fair for me to take this on. It's just hard on the money I have.

I've been putting aside my assignments and meetings just so I can spend time with her. I haven't forgotten about my friends though. I'm not one of those people. My friendships will always remain a high priority to me, whether I'm dating someone or not.

As Nina would say, "partners come and go, but friends will always stay."

Actually, that's something that Nina repeats to me right in this second as she catches me daydreaming about Delilah again in the middle of our conversation. "Priscilla, get it together!"

She's right.

12 year old me has been having so much fun with all of this, it's crazy. I need to came back to Earth, but so does she.

"And what about you? Are you tired of always talking about Dash?" To anyone else, those questions could sound rude, but it's different with us.

We understand each other completely and act like we've known each other our entire lives. She playfully hits my shoulder and says,  "I know, ok! He's just so amazing and everything he does and says is like—"

I call her out immediately, "I think you already told me all of this a few minutes ago!"

"I hate you," she says with the grandest frown on her face. She hits me with one of her pillows this time before getting up to grab her blue water bottle from her desk, which is when I take the chance to hit her back too.

She slowly turns back without even making it halfway to her painted desk, and takes the fluffy object from me and throws it at me. In two seconds, we go from being two mature adults to attacking each other with random pillows in an intense battle. We go back and forth before I give up, announcing, "alright! You win!"

She bows in front of me, and says, "I'm the winner, as always."

I fake annoyance toward her, telling her, "you're something for sure."

"What was that? I can't hear you over the the sound of my victory!"

I laugh and tell her that she can quit it now. She does, but not before she searches up the sound of cheering from her phone and puts the speaker all the way up. Her neighbors next door pound on the door, and that's what finally makes her put an end to it.

"Now that you're done," I tell her very dramatically with the most serious tone I can come up with, "I'd like to talk about me again."

"What?"

"How do I break it to Delilah that I can't fund this lifestyle at this rate anymore?"

She covers her mouth before letting out a muffled laugh, and says, "you sound like a rich dad who has to tell his spoiled daughter that he's not paying for her yachts and trips around the world anymore."

"Actually, speaking of that, Madison recently had that happen to her."

"Seriously?" Nina asks, with her brown eyes and mouth wide open. She's surprised, as was I when I first heard the news. Madison is used to a certain kind of life and. . . She's had an interesting week now that she's being forced to live like a normal person.

I mean, she still has all of her designer clothes and Instagram influencer account. But it's as close to being a regular person that she'll ever get. All of her complaining has proved that even that is too much for her to handle.

I tell Nina that's not the point though, and I ask her again, "what should I do?"

"Be honest. She should already know you're not able to afford as many things as she can. And you don't want to take advantage of her money again, find fun stuff that the two of you can do that doesn't cost money."

We've been to some of the cringy, but free, talent shows at my college, but most of our trips to different places have cost money.

"Like what?"

"Go on a hike, have a movie marathon, do. . . Sexual activities."

"Did you seriously just say that? Like seriously?"

She's cracking up in her corner of the room and I hate her for it. She's holding onto her sparkly pillow tightly in case I try to take it from her and initiate another fight.

"And sex doesn't count as a date! You're ridiculous, you know that right?"

That only makes her laugh more.

"Look, I don't know how far you two have or haven't gone but. . . It does pass the time."

"Speaking from experience?" I ask her.

I get to tease her this time. She sits back, leaning against the wall as she thinks about what she should say next. This isn't something that she's updated me about with Dash.

"Maybe . . ." She chooses to tell me in an act of denial but acceptance.

"When?! And you didn't tell me?!"

This is huge. It was Nina's first time and she didn't consult me! Not for advice or words of motivation or anything. Sure, sex with my ex-girlfriend may have been slightly different than how it would be with Dash but. . . Still.

"I didn't want to bother you. . . "

"Why would you think you would have been bothering me?"

"You were struggling a lot with Delilah coming back and I didn't want to give you my good news when you were so down. And we haven't had a lot of time to talk about it now that you've been together so I just. . ."

I'm a terrible friend.

"I am so sorry Nina. I don't care if I'm on my deathbed or am down like I was with Delilah, you always have to tell me these things. Hearing good things happen to you makes me happy! Very very very happy. And I'm sorry that I made you feel like you couldn't share your happiness with me."

"I promise to tell you everything that happens from now on," she says with a smile on her face.

"So, tell me! How was it? Tell me everything! Not like exactly everything but. . . You know what I mean."

"It was. . .  Amazing. Better than I ever could have imagined. He did this thing where he-"

"And I don't need to know that!" It's too much info for me to know about that part of their lives. Like way too much.

She pauses before speaking up again, but this time about what led up to it. She doesn't spare any details there, and I'm simply happy and grateful to be able to support my friend and be her personal cheerleader.

It's time for me to start over.