Forgotten kiss ||Hyunlix<3||

Home.

I sat on my old bed, it was so comfy. I wonder if it even accepted me. I wouldn't be surprised if it hadn't.

This house brought back some of the memories I had forgotten. I almost felt sorry for them. My memories I mean. They had no where to go, trapped in the house all alone. Their owner abandoned them.

I wasn't glad to be home. Not at all. But there was a sense of comfort.. something I can't explain. I looked over at my old desk where a mirror was placed above it. The thing I saw was hideous. What did I do to myself? I'm finally seeing what everyone else sees. I couldn't stand it. How could anyone even look at me?

I stood up and walked over to the closet, when I opened it, it let out a low creaking noise. I remember that noise. I scanned the closet and found what I was looking for, a cream colored bed sheet, in the same exact place as when I left. I took it out and draped it over the mirror.

I sat back down on my bed and instantly felt a little bit of relief. There's was a soft knock on the door, I didn't want to open it. I was finally alone. I didn't move. The door knob twisted and I looked over to see my sisters head peaking inside the small crack she created. "Can I- come in?" No.

I nodded yes.

She walked in and I thought that was it until I saw a second body walk through the doorway. It was my brother, he took a seat on the chair in front of my desk and Yeji found her place next to me on the bed.

"Do you want to play a game with us? You know.. like when we were kids?" This wasn't what I needed, now was hardly to right time to be playing games. I shook my head no and pulled my knees up to my chest. I looked over and made eye contact with my little brother, he hasn't taken his eyes off me this whole time. Yeji seemed to have also notice this. "Cut it out Ni-ki.."

Ni-ki. I Mouthed the syllables slowly. Ni-ki. Yeji watched as I did so, "do you want Ni-ki?" I was going to shake my head in protest, but I saw how his head perked up really fast after my sister had asked. I didn't want to disappoint them again. His eyes were locked on me now. My palms felt clammy and stomach started to get the droopy feeling. Why did I feel so nervous? I raised my hand and slightly waved at him. It was stupid, and I wish I could've done more. For once, I wish I could've said something.

"Hi Hyunjin." He said waving back. I felt my throat get tight, I blinked my eyes supper fast to avoid letting the tears drop, and to get the stinging to subside.

He didn't hate me.

"Don't cry.." my sister whispered sweetly. As if I was her little child. I wanted her to stop. She didn't have to care for me, no one did. "It's okay jinnie.. I promise it will be okay."

Promises don't exist. The tear I was holding back spilled from my swollen, puffy eyelids. My eyes were too full. I sat there frozen, I didn't dare blink in fear of more tears spilling. Her hand reached over, she wiped my face with the knuckle of her index finger.

"Jinnie?" Ni-ki was speaking now, "I missed you." I miss me too. I wasn't him right now. I didn't know who I was in the current moment.

I wanted to tell him I missed him too, I wanted to hug him. I wanted to feel like his big brother again. I guess seeing the people you love really can change certain things about your emotions. Just yesterday I had no motivation live. I can't say I wanted to live now.. but I definitely wanted to be their for my family.

"Hyunjinnie?" I looked over at my sister, I guess I was getting better with eye contact. Only for them though.

"Are you hungry at all? I can make you something.." I shook my head no, she didn't have to take care of me. I could take care of-

"You can't take care of yourself," Ni-ki spoke up with his head down, "and I know that seems like im digging at you, but I'm not, I just- I can see you can't... so we'll do it for you." He smiled.

My mouth opened to speak, but no words came out. I didn't even know what I wanted to say. Then again, It didn't matter anyways.