Forgotten kiss ||Hyunlix<3||

Friend.

"This is my home~"

He was practically jumping in excitement. He was happy that I was here.

I looked around slowly. It was a small place, cute and a tiny bit messy. But I expected nothing less from Han Jisung.

"Sorry it's a little messy, I've just been so busy. Anyways, how are you?.. sorry I guess that was a stupid question huh?" He said letting out some nervous laughter.

My lips came up into a tight nit gesture, me feeling awkward and unsure of what to do at this current moment.

It's so awkward when you can't speak to people.

"Hey.. I know this might be a little much right now, and I'm so sorry you're going through this. I know saying sorry won't magically make it better, but i want you to know I'm always here for you. And if there's anything you want to know or ask.. you can write it down on a piece of paper..maybe? Just a thought.." he said trailing off.

I didn't say anything for a second, but I nodded my head, hoping he'd understand.

"Really?" He stood up quickly and basically ran to find what I was assuming to be paper. Sure enough, he came back with a big happy grin on his face, a notebook, and a pencil.

"Here! Ask away."

He studied me as I sat still on his couch with a notebook in my lap. My hand rested faintly on the paper with the pencil lightly in my fingertips.

I bit my lip trying to think of what to write. He could tell I was struggling, "how.. how long are you planning on staying here?" He asked.

I hesitated before jotting down my answer, 'I don't know, it wasn't my idea to come back.' I passed the notepad to him and watched as his eyebrows lowered as he read.

"You didn't want to come home?" Before he handed back the paper he continued, "ohhhh its probably family things huh? Well I get that, seeing family after being so far.. down, can be hard."

Jisung hasn't spoke to me much about when he went through his tuff spot in life, and I guess it makes sense why he doesn't. Even If I did speak, I wouldn't want to either.

"Do you like staying with them?" I stared back at him, and then glanced down at his hands.

"Oh, right." He said finally handing the notebook back to me. 'No, I feel like a disappointment and a burden there.' He nodded, "ahhh, I get that.. don't want to be the reason everyone stops what there doing to take care of you and changes their whole life around."

After a little more "talking" back and forth, for the first time since I got home, I felt comfortable.

"Hey.. did you want like to maybe stay over? I mean- I don't know exactly how you are, but I know I never wanted to stay at my house. That's part of why I moved."

I nodded my head eagerly, maybe a little too much. Because he just laughed, "okay okay, I'll text your sister, I have some clothes so it'll be fine, well if you're okay with it."

I nodded again.

I waited patiently while Jisung talked with my sister on the phone, I could tell he had to reassure her a little, but In the end she agreed.

"Hey did you want a shower or anything?"

I stared back at him blankly, I did want a shower, but it was a task for me to even look at my own body and not get triggered.

Jisung looked back at me, his eyes growing more and more kind. "Let's go," was all he said before turning towards the hall and disappearing from my view. I stood up and followed. Walking slowly, looking around at all the stuff around his house.

"I'm in here!"

I jumped, turning to the left where I found Jisung in a bathroom with a towel folded over his arm. "do you want the water warm or cold? Personally I think you're crazy if you like cold, but to each their own," he shrugged.

I looked at my hands and the lack of the notebook, and then cautiously walk over and turned the water towards the warm side.

"I knew I could trust you." Jisung smiled, "I'll run some water for you, don't worry, I won't look too hard."

I was thankful. And beyond touched that someone would do this for me.

When the water was done, I slipped out of my clothes, still being careful to keep myself mostly covered. And slowly sank into the water. It was perfect, it did burn slightly from some of my more fresher wounds, but nothing major.

I sat in the water, my knees up to my chest, and rested my head on my knees. Jisung was back, he had a cup and a baby blue wash cloth.

"Okay, are you good? Want any music or anything?"

I shook my head, the silence was nice. No overstimulation.

I felt the water run down my back, soon followed by the wash cloth, and a Soothing lavender scent. He rubbed my back gently and moved down to my arms. He was even more careful with that area, using no cloth and just his bare hand.

"Head back please~" he was even talking gently. He was like a mother and their first born child.

I tilted my head and felt the water rush through my hair, it felt nice. The way his fingers went in my hair to clean it. He poured yet another cup of water on my head, and I felt a water droplet fall down my cheek. He was quick to get the towel and dry it away.

Then another one. Dried.

And another.

Until finally I realized it wasn't water from the shower.

I was crying.