A Psychic's Psyche | yuwin

understanding

There was a feeling that glided through the air that day, it wasn't quite happiness, nor was it sadness, you could call it relief, or serenity, but that only waters down the indescribable emotions that carried through the room.

Because truthfully, there was a sense of tragedy in the air, like a rose with with it's thorns, like the sound of church bells ringing. It was sad, it was solace, and that felt right. They were still sat on the floor, as the two slowly processed everything that had happened.

Sicheng didn't know he was capable of physically going into someone's memories, he didn't know that people like him could tear themselves up just from their own emotions, there was so much he didn't know, but he did know that he underestimated himself.

For years, Sicheng had dragged himself down, not knowing his full capabilities, isolated as the sole person in the world like him. In some ways, Yuta saved him just as much as he saved Yuta.

Saved from a lifetime of self-hatred, saved from a lifetime of loneliness, saved from never truly knowing if he was the only one. Knowing such an understanding, forgiving and free spirited soul made him wanna be the most honest version of himself, to stop masking his powers in front of someone was so liberating, he didn't wanna stay shut away from Yuta, wanted to tell him everything.

"Can I ask you something?" Yuta's silky voice uttered, hoarser than Sicheng had heard up until today. Sicheng nodded in response. "What happened to Yukhei? When... I passed out."

It felt depressing now to think about, he didn't understand Yuta's past or their history when he saw Yukhei leave, but now that he knows, it feels hard to tell Yuta that he pretty much abandoned him. "He just... Left." A somber voice let out.

He knew it would hurt him, he understood the human mind better than most given that he heard every single thought that grazed the minds of those around him. And knowing everything the two of them had been through, it was unfair to Yuta for him to just have walked off like that.

"Is there any way that you'd go with me to find him? I wanna make sure he's okay, I'm sure he's worried sick." He was surprised, Yuta didn't seem hurt or upset, he just wanted his friend to be safe.

Sicheng thought back to the memories he saw of them as kids, of them when they graduated, when they were young adults, every single memory from before Jungwoo died. Sicheng saw all of it, they had so much fun together, they made each other whole, they were happy.

Things changed so much after Jungwoo was gone, they were both so broken without him, it was hard to think about the hole that Jungwoo left, like a puzzle missing it's last piece.

"I'll go with you." He told him softly, taking ahold of his hand. They headed out of his apartment and it wasn't long until they found him, stationed at the corner of the hallway. He was sitting, tears falling from his eyes.

Yuta approached him delicately. "Hey, are you okay?" The teary eyed boy looked up at him, without hesitation he pulled Yuta into a hug. "I'm so glad you're alive" He muttered quietly to him.

"Y-You were worried about me? Then why did you just leave like that?" Yukhei let out a sigh, "I... Didn't wanna be there if something happened to you and you didn't make it... When I tried to go back- when I tried to save him, it always the same moment, every time the same moment. I just wanted to save him, but I had to watch him die over and over again. I couldn't see you die too, I couldn't imagine what would happen if I lost you."

Yuta held him, he didn't wanna let him go, not after hearing him break down like that. "Let's go home, Yukhei." He helped the other off of the ground, and the three of them headed back to the apartment.

Yukhei and Sicheng hadn't spoken more than a few words to each other since they've met, but Sicheng felt that he'd known him for an eternity. "So you're WinWin? I've heard quite a bit about you." He gave a slight smile, "It's nice to formally meet you, I guess you could say I've heard a lot about you too."

Yukhei's emotionally vulnerable state seemed to be fading, as the strong negative emotions dissipated from his face. "I'm not sure what happened back there, but I wanna thank you for keeping him safe."

Those words meant more to Sicheng than he could ever say, after getting to know Yukhei through years worth of memories, his opinion was important to him, because he knew what Yukhei was to Yuta, he knew who Yukhei was now.

"Thank you too, for being such a good friend to him all those years." Yukhei seemed surprised, but that was exactly what he needed to hear in that moment, I guess that could be expected from a telepathist, even so, it alleviated the doubt and guilt that Yukhei felt for leaving his best friend.

After hearing him break down like that, Sicheng couldn't hold his trauma against him, it was hard for both of them. Had Sicheng not did whatever his powers granted him to, to go into his memories, to talk to Yuta's inner voice, then Yuta's guilt certainly would've killed him.

It was strange, how psychic's  emotions manifested themselves, to feel something so strong and confusing that it overwhelms your body. Yuta couldn't let himself move on, because he thought everything was his fault, because he thought that Jungwoo wouldn't have wanted that, but none of that was true.

It would take a while for his body to fully recover from this, he'd still be weak and lightheaded for a while, but his past would never drag him to that place again.

Yukhei and Sicheng guided Yuta to bed, making sure he didn't lose balance, although he seemed to be handling everything well. "Do you need anything? I'm gonna go home but I'll check on you before I go to work, is that okay?" He softly stroked his hair, even when feeling so physically drained, he was still so beautiful.

"No, I don't need anything. I'll be fine. I'll see you tomorrow morning." He stroked the puffy-eyed boy's soft cheeks and gave him a little peck before beginning to make his way out. "Hey," he spoke, making Sicheng stop in his tracks, "I love you."

His heart nearly beat out of his chest, it felt almost unreal to him, this day was like a hazy dream, one of mixed emotions, a plot progressing before he can stop and process what happened. And if this were a dream, this would be the part that was sprinkled in sweetly, right before he awoke.

He responded quicker than Yuta expected, gazing directly into his eyes, not missing a breath. "I love you too." He'd never spoken truer words, he knew without a doubt in his mind that he loved Yuta.