In Love With An Angel (a. butler)

Twenty.

What does this mean? Was Dad caught in this too? Why was this even happening? My mind caved and expanded and swirled around, I couldn't focus my thoughts. Too many questions and not enough answers. I stood staring at the page in the sketch pad. My tears formed a wet spot on the chest of my grey shirt as they dropped down. I couldn't believe that the connection I had was growing. What's the reason for all of this?

I heard the door open and footsteps downstairs, Mom and Howard entered bickering at each other about something prior to returning home. Their voices traveled into the kitchen and became too faint for me to make out anymore. Does Mom know too? She gave me the pad, she must've know what was in it? I thought back on the days when Dad was still around, I couldn't remember if Mom actually saw Dad drawing. All of this brought chills to my body, knowing that there was truly something darker and dangerous in our world.

"Rose! Could you come down here please?" Mom yelled

I flinched at the sound of her voice suddenly. My arms reached down as I snatched up the sketchpad and shoved it into my bag. I knew she would ask what was going on if I just showed up down there with my face wet and eyes puffy. Standing in the mirror, I quickly wiped away my lingering tears and placed on my hoodie to cover the dark pool upon my shirt. I slowly headed into the kitchen and found her leaning over the counter removing items from plastic bags. Howard slipped past me answering a phone call that I was sure related to the meeting from before.

"Help me with these"

"Are you cooking?" I asked, attempting to sound normal when in actuality my head was still spinning. I reached for the groceries and began putting them up in their proper areas.

"I thought spaghetti would be nice" She said

I nodded. She didn't seem to be as mad about last week anymore, I stayed to myself around the house. In the beginning I thought it was unfair but now I realize it was actually pretty crappy of me. I was so caught up in everything with Austin that I forgot what's really expected of me with Mom and Howard. She placed a pot of water on the stove prepping it for the noodles. I chewed on the inside of my jaw wondering what would happen if I asked her about Dad right now. I was so anxious, I tried to keep everything calm but his drawings ran miles in my mind.

"Mom?" I said breaking moments of silence. She glanced over at me as she placed her hair into a ponytail.

"Yes?"

I hesitated. Did I really want to know if Mom was connected too? What if she confirms and then what? What will all this mean for me? And Austin? That gang must've been something Dad was apart of. What if she was too? Or still is..

"I..I was wondering about-" I swallowed my saliva. "D-Dad" I managed to say.

Her ears perked up and she turned to face me directly as I stood on the other side of the island. She placed her hands on her hips.

"What about him sweetie?"

"Well, the sketch-

"Oh, I knew it. Rose, I didn't want you to become sad about those sketches." She sighed

"No. Mom, I'm not sad."

"Then what's going on?"

I hesitated again. "Did..did he ever mention anything weird? To you?" I was beginning to realize I had no idea how to approach this situation. She raised an eyebrow at me.

"What do you mean weird?"

"Like..out of the norm, maybe? Did you notice a change?"

"Of course I did, your father changed very much. He started drinking, and he was not the same man I once knew. Rose, where is this coming from? Are you sure that sketchpad wasn't a mistake?"