Our future signed in letter

Chapter 15

London:

The days of his twilight state and his attacks of fever drag on. Again and again he cannot distinguish between reality and delusion. This pain and the persistent, excruciating cough robs him of his strength. But the worst thing for him is his concern for her that she might get the same fever. She is too stubborn, which reminds him strongly of himself and yet he is grateful that she is with him all the time during this difficult time and takes away his fear.
That night he learns to let go, to let go of his difficult past, his memories. He could never forget his past, but from then on it will no longer haunt him and he will slowly be able to dispel his self-doubts about himself.
This path has been painful for him that night, but also for her.
Inevitably, she has been confronted with his childhood trauma, which he was trying to hide. He doesn't blame her for what happened that night.
She has done what has to be done to save his life. Only he hasn’t been in control of himself because he has been delusional. He has been only able to perceive her words vaguely and has been unable to respond adequately to them. So that nightmare from back then has come up again in him. A nightmare that he has learned to put aside over the years. But with the event of the bleaching of his hands and Mikasa's beautiful, but also irritating dream, his memory from then has come back to life.

And again it was two women who saved him from this misery. He can still clearly feel Mikasa's tight embrace when he has been in his delirium and he also has felt her despair over what has happened.
Don't blame yourself about it! You made your choice and you were right! He thinks. Slowly he comes back to reality and he can perceive his surroundings clearly again. It is early in the morning and he sees Mikasa crouching in front of the bed. She has fallen asleep in this position that night. She looks tired and exhausted.
He vaguely remembers his mother's name and that Mikasa has spoken about her, or at least he could only understand his mother's name. Everything else is blurry and his head aches from thinking.
How did Mikasa find out about his mother's name?
He has never mentioned his mother in anyone's presence, the memory of her is too painful. Slowly his broken hand leads over to Mikasa's head of hair and strokes her hair. Mikasa notices his touch and looks at him with relief.
“Come to bed, brat. Otherwise you will get sick too ”, he asks her and she lies down next to him, exhausted.

She stares at Levi out of tired eyes. He's looking better again, and he's called her by her unflattering nickname again. Relieved, she takes him in her arms and she can no longer hold back her tears. Surprised by her reaction, Levi returns her hug, “Everything will be fine. Do you understand? ”He tries to calm her down. Her body shudders with relief that it is reacting normally again and that he is still with her.
Kuchel, she thinks, I helped your father. I hope to see you again sometime.
And she wipes away her tears.
"Get some sleep. Today I can drink and eat alone again and if you take me downstairs afterwards, I can let the doctor in today too. You rest completely today and tomorrow! ”He determines for her. Mikasa contradicts him and shakes his head.
“You had a strong fever last night. I won't leave you alone with it! "

He tries to say something against it, but leaves it at that. Basically, she is right about her caution.
"Maybe we should wait and see what the doctor says today," says Levi as a compromise.
Mikasa nods and agrees.

Tired, she falls asleep in his arms and comes to rest for a few hours and interrupts her sleep once to go downstairs to let the doctor in.
The doctor looks at Mikasa's exhausted condition. "Was it bad for your husband tonight?", He asks worried. Mikasa doesn't want to talk to the doctor about last night. Levi's memory and pleading for help were too bad for her and it would bring tears to her eyes again to have to talk about it again.
“Please come upstairs. Levi says he's better. But I'm afraid for him that it might come back” , the doctor calmly follows her.
"Mr. Ackermann! I didn't expect, that you look better again”, the doctor greets him. Levi is sitting upright in his bed and is drinking the last mug of tea that Mikasa has made again the night before.
“Your wife already told me about last night. How are you feeling? ”Asks the doctor.
When the doctor called Mikasa Levi's wife, he stares over at Mikasa in surprise. She escapes with red cheeks and embarrassed his gaze.
Levi is perplexed that the doctor called her his wife. She doesn't deny it in the presence of the doctor, or how shall he understand that? Does she indirectly agree to a liaison?
He has to ask her as soon as possible and doesn't want to put it off for too long.
After 20 minutes, the doctor has finished examining Levi's health.
"Don't worry, Ms. Ackermann", he takes all of Levi's vital signs again, listens to his lungs, examines his throat and looks at his skin condition.
“Your wife took excellent care of you. You can be very happy to have such a loving person by your side ", the Doctor says happily to him," you apparently had an easy course. If you can even speak of it. Starting today, you can also get out of bed for a few hours. "
Levi and Mikasa both get red in the face and he looks thoughtful. " I am ", he says truthfully and has to look at her all the time. Mikasa looks up and smiles happily at him.