today marks exactly 3 months pregnant. the morning sickness has gotten worse, but i feel better by noon. and any lavender scent makes me extremely nauseous. oh and i'm always craving strawberries for some reason.
rafe and i havent told many people about the pregnancy yet, just sarah, kelce topper, jj, and kie. but were planning on telling our parents, and more friends soon.
when i first found out i was pregnant, i was most worried about how rafe would react to being a dad. sometimes here and there he will question whether he would be a good enough father to the baby, and stress that he will be as shitty as a father as his is, but with a little but of reassurance he's okay.
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tonight is also the annual bonfire. the day of the year that all pogues, kooks, and tourons get together and have a huge party at the boneyard. rafe has asked me about a million times if i was sure about going, but i could never miss it.
he went home to get ready while i stayed at my house to get ready myself.
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i put on a tight black dress, it was nice because i wasn't showing yet. not even the slightest baby bump. i curled my hair, did my makeup, brushed my teeth again, covered myself in my favourite vanilla perfume, grabbed my converse and headed out the door.
"hi baby" rafe said while walking up to me.
"hey" i said while wrapping my arms around his neck.
his arms snaked across my waist and his head rested in the crook of my neck.
"hmm you smell delicious." he mumbled as i giggled.
he pulled out of the hug to look at my dress. "you look beautiful as always" he says
he twirls me causing us both to laugh.
"all mine." he mumbles
"all yours." i confirm as he kisses me.
"you look hot" i say as i giggle. he was wearing a black polo shirt, with the first two buttons undone (as always) with beige pants, our matching converse and his ocean cologne that i love.
"baby are you sure you want to go? we can stay home. youre pregnant and i dont want you to overdo yourself tonight. " he says with a concerned look on his face
"i promise im sure. i will tell you if its too much, okay?" i said
he nodded.
we hopped in the car and drove to the boneyard. his hand rested on my stomach the whole time he drove. i knew he was going to be the best father.
once we arrived, we said hello to topper and sarah.
we talked for a while about the baby and stuff, until we went our separate ways.
"baby do you want to go get a drink?" he asked me
"do they have anything other than beer?" i asked concernedly
"yes, i made sure they brought some." he says, earning a smile from me
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it was later in the night, rafe and topper had quickly left to go to get something from the car while i was standing alone by the punch table.
"hey" an unfamiliar voice says, it was a radom touron.
"hello?" i say.
"why is a pretty girl like you standing alone?" he asks while stumbling closer to me. he wreaked of alcohol. he was drunk.
"my boyfriend went to the car." i said.
he didnt say anything back. he just looked me up and down, making me uncomfortable.
"uh, im gonna go now" i said while walking away before he grabbed my arm and pulled me close to him.
"what the fuck! get the hell off of me" i yelled , getting peoples attention.
he didnt let go. so i elbowed him in the nose.
"oh you stupid bitch" he yelled while pushing me to the ground. i screamed.
"Y/N!" rafe yelled while he and topper ran to me.
"little girl needs her boyfriend to be safe?" the touron spat while kicking me directly in the stomach causing me to scream again in pain. causing rafe to run even faster. and loads of people to surround us.
"Touch my girl again and i will fucking kill you. actually, i might aswell do it now." rafe spat at the man as he started strangling him.
sarah helped me off of the ground, but something didnt feel right. a shooting pain went through my stomach. i looked down at my legs and blood was pouring down the inside of my thighs. shit. the baby.
"Rafe-" i cried.
rafe turned and looked right at me, then down to my legs. "topper finish him" he yelled as he dropped to the ground and lifted my dress above my thighs.
"the baby" he mumbled.
he picked me up and ran towards the car. after he placed me in the passenger seat he drove as fast as he could to the hospital. i was crying and panicking more then i ever have before. i was in so much pain but all i could think about was the baby. he put his shirt between my legs to stop the bleeding but it wasn't enough.
"hey baby, look at me. youre gonna be okay, and so is the baby." he reassured multiple times.
once we got to the hospital, he carried me in and rushed to the emergency department.
"somebody help!" he yelled, and with that many nurses came running in with a stretcher.
"what happened?" the nurse asked as she was running to the operating room.
"she's pregnant but was kicked in the stomach really hard and now shes bleeding uncontrolably" rafe yelled
his hand never left mine.
"excuse me sir, were going to have to take her into surgery, you need to wait out here." she said
he gave me a really concerned look.
"rafe im scared" i cried.
"hey baby, its okay. they are going to help you and the baby okay.?" he said as they were bringing me through the doors. his hand let go of mine and they rushed me into surgery.
"keep her safe! i will pay as much as i need to make sure her and the baby are okay!" he yelled at the nurses.
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the next day, i was sent home from the hospital but on bedrest for a week.and with lots of medication. the surgeon explained that the kick nearly missed the baby. it damaged the tissue surrounding the fetus. which is where the blood was coming from.
rafe never left my side for the next many weeks. he blames himself for leaving me alone that night. ive told him many times that its not his fault, but he still thinks it is.
i cant wait to grow our family with him. i love him unconditionally and know hes my forever.
