Cardinal

Chapter 37

Julie and I pig out in the meantime. We've watched every Criminal Minds episode, and every Law & Order episode and I'm completely caught up with every pop culture reference. I've even downloaded Tik Tok on my iPhone and have been scrolling mindlessly every chance I get. 

The guys have been coming to visit every day but Felix has been turning them away. I couldn't bear to hear their voices so I've been hiding if I even hear them approaching. 

Julie has been great and Alaina has also been avoiding the guys and staying over as much as she can and we all just watch movies and be complete and total hermits for days on end. At Julie's request as well as Dean's request, her home is guarded by several mercenaries due to her recent kidnapping.  

Julie and Alaina have also helped me get everything set up with my life. First and foremost, I actually had a lot of money. Well, enough money that I'd be alright to not work for the next two years if I lived minimally. 

We had gone to Seattle a week ago to get a bank account set up for me. With the right identification and papers, I had complete access to what was left of my parents' assets, including a house in Spokane, the trust fund that they had set up for me if I ever wanted to go to college, and their earnings from various jobs as a mercenary team. 

I'd thought that my uncle had gotten most of the money but I guess Bath made sure that some of the money was for just me. 

The first thing I wanted to do was get various tombstones set up for them. One for my mom, dads, and my unborn baby brother. 

It would be shameful to have their tombstones in this god-forsaken town, so I chose to have their tombstones made near the town in Spokane, near the house that they'd purchased for respite. 

On one of our trips to Spokane, I did all the necessary paperwork to have the deed transferred to my name and checked out the house. It wasn't in too bad of a shape. Since it's been in the bank's possession, it's been rented out to some people who've kept it in good shape, and lucky for me, it's currently vacant. So, I'd taken ownership of the property. 

It was a glorious home and I'm surprised my parents had splurged on a property as big as this. It was located in a well-off neighborhood and the houses were spaced out enough that you had to walk a good distance to your next-door neighbor. It was nothing like the McMansion but it was big enough for me. 

With the money in my bank account, I'd hired cleaners to clean the whole house, gardeners to spruce up the lawn and the garden outdoors, and furniture to make the place look nice. I had planned on spending a few days or so to just...make it liveable.

I could see myself here on a chilly October morning. Hot coffee in my hands and looking at the vast expanse of Washington greenery and sighing in contentment. Perched on a rocking chair, I would sit cross-legged, wrapped in a warm blanket while I read a book, the flittering melodies of the native finches blessing my ears as I get sucked into the world of the book I was reading. 

If things had turned out quite differently and we weren't fighting some war we had no desire to be in, I would have thought that would be the perfect scenario...a dream waiting to be realized. 

I would have worked hard as a merc team member, and done a few odd jobs to make extra money to make this dream come true. I would have had a different gift because, in this reality, I wouldn't be hunted like an animal for my gift, or more like curse. Maybe I would have super strength or some sort of innocuous ability that made me useful enough to be a good working member of the mercenary team.   

None of that seemed appealing when I thought about it longer. My links wouldn't be with me to keep me warm on a chilly morning. They wouldn't be there to kiss me good morning and I would never feel the sense of completeness that I feel when they're all with me. I wouldn't be able to hear Steel's voice in my head, making an inappropriate comment because he knows it would make me smile. Keenan's boisterous laugh wouldn't fill the room with sonorous echoes. I wouldn't be able to secretly browse Will's collection of books and he wouldn't kiss me senseless when he caught me snooping. I wouldn't be able to go toe-to-toe with Damian in...anything. We were imperfect altogether but complete nonetheless.