Bitter (wlw) (txs)

seven

I suddenly found myself in front of the last person I thought would be there.

I found myself in front of Sam, who was wearing a dark blue blazer with matching tailored pants.

For a few seconds I thought I was just having a really realistic dream, or maybe I was hallucinating. But everything was real. And it made me feel completely frozen.

The only thing I could hear was my suddenly increased heartbeat, the room was on fire. It was as if I'd been temporarily transported out of myself, I don't even know how to explain it.

The shock was probably noticeable from my face, since the only sound that broke my state of confusion was Mei's voice asking if I was okay.

That's when I noticed my jaw had completely dropped and my mouth was right open.

"Yeah, it's just...I'm just a bit hot, I'm probably overdressed" I attempted to answer.

"You sure? You look....flustered" she whispered.

"Yeah. Um, yeah, I just need some water and I'll be fine" I said, taking my water bottle out of my bag and taking a sip.

Was that why she never talked about her job to me? Did she already know and didn't want to tell me?

That's why she ran away the previous evening.

Needless to say I didn't pay attention to a single word she said during those two hours. I just wanted them to be over and go home.

I didn't even know if I wanted to confront Sam or not. I honestly felt like I didn't even want to see her anymore.

The feeling went away for a brief second when my gaze met hers, as she was talking about exam dates or something, as I said I wasn't really listening.

I was just looking at her as the words she was speaking only felt like meaningless sounds.

But that was just because of how gorgeous she was. My eyes were automatically attracted to her figure and it honestly felt like I was sinking each time she looked at me. The fact that I couldn't do anything about that made me quite mad at myself, honestly.

Once the class was over I carelessly threw my stuff into my bag and got up, walking past Sam as I faced the floor and basically escaped the room as quickly as I could.

I luckily didn't have any other class that day.

"Wait, Ellie!" Mei's voice once again interrupted my thoughts.
"Did I do or say something wrong? I'm sorry if I did" she asked.

"No, you really didn't, I'm sorry if you got that impression" I felt genuinely really guilty. But there was also no way of explaining what had just happened and why my mood suddenly switched. "I'm just tired and hot. I was probably really stressed earlier and my body just caught up on it. I need to rest, you can text me whenever you want, though. Really"

"I hope you feel better then" she said, placing a hand on my shoulder. "It's better if you rest. See you tomorrow?"

"Sure thing" I smiled.

I got home completely exhausted and full of questions just running through my head.  There were so many of them that I couldn't even think clearly.

I couldn't even understand why I was feeling so furious. It was as if I had this big ball of anger trapped in my chest and couldn't fully place the reason behind it or how to get rid of it.

Was I mad at Sam? Mad at myself? Both?

She could have told me she was most likely going to be my professor instead of being so secretive. Maybe she didn't realize. Maybe it was all a big coincidence.