The Price of Champions and Crowns (Hunger Games)

26

"If he could see you now, and how you've treated her..." 

"Snow won't hang her from a tree, Johanna. Get over it".

Johanna couldn't get Finnick's stupid words out of head. No matter how many times she swang her axe in anger. It didn't help. She didn't have her spawn next to her. The rythm was off. It needs to be thump...thump into the trees in the clearing. One thump of an axe messes with that permanance. 

Hell! Finnick's echoing words in her head messes with her fake stupid permanence. She screamed out in frustation and the lone sound her axe made wedging itself into the tree. No thump following after it. 

She huffed in annoyance. How long has shee been out here for?. She was here by five thirty. It looks like noon now, maybe just before. Enough for the spliters in her fingers to grow to something more painful. Long enough that she couldn't ignore the smear of blood that coates the handle of her axe. Its lodged in the tree, bloody axe staring her down. As if to say 'remember what you did?'...

She paused and took in a deep breath as if that would silence the constant screaming in her head.

It didn't stop. 

It never stops. 

Her eyes open to stare back at the bloddy axe. Memories of the arena filling her head. Obviously its gotten to that point in the day when its best to leave the clearing. These screams can be tomorrows problem. Its always going to be tomorrows problem.

With a click of dissatisfaction at not having conqoured her demon's, Johanna strides angrily back to her mansion.

As soon as she whips open her front door she finds that the force she used caused the door to slam behind her. The bang making her jump. Trapping her on the floor she can't stand to be in.

"If he could see you now, and how you've treated her..." 

She ground her teeth in anger. 

To her this would always be Reed's floor. 

That's all she saw when she looked at the walls of the grand first floor. They hardly used upstairs. People of Seven are passionate. Johanna and Reed loved to make love on the floor, back doors wide open with the curtains fluttering in like a dream. It made sense in her head, that the little thing that looks like him should live in the memory of him too. 

Lord knows she couldn't face him, or her. Not when they have the same face. Everywhere on this floor she could find him. Its why she never used it. Why she confined her to it. Because it was hers and it could never be Johanna's. It was their home first, until he was gone and Victoria was all that remained of him. 

Johanna inhaled and she swore, despite all the years she could still smell him faintly. She could tell herself he's just working at the lumber yard and he'll be back by nightfall. She sniggered, what a pretty lie to tell herself. 

"Snow won't hang her from a tree, Johanna. Get over it".

She flinched at Finnick's annoying voice in her head. Like its just there to taunt her now. How does one simply 'get over it'?. She bet if it was Annie, the stupid prick would never get over it. If it'd been Annie Cresta handing from a fishing pole, she'd bet Finnick wouldn't of given two shits about Liam.

She tusked. She'd cared about Victoria. Made sure her basic needs were met. She wasn't cruel afterall. The child had a Nanny for the first five years of its life. What child in District Seven has a Nanny? Reed's child. That's who. She made sure the little thing had training from the time it'd devloped fine motor skills. Before she could cut a circle out of paper she'd already taught her how to toss and stand with an axe.

 Admittedly, you can't teach aim to a three year old but Johanna had her ready to win before she was twelve. She'd be damned if Snow decided to reap Reed's child in her first reaping. And she'd never known hunger. Sure she 'forgot' to provide when she was what Johanna deemed too old for a Nanny. Between the ages of six and seven. And swore like a sailor when she'd heard that Reed's child had been stealing in the District.

Of course, what a Reed thing to do. She could imagaine a young Reed with the same wide blue eyes having to source his own food. But his child, no way would she allow his child to suffer. And well providing fifty dollars was to make up for that fact that Reed's child was without Reed. Which was entirely her own fault. 

"If he could see you now, and how you've treated her..."

She scoffed. He would be damn proud. 

She crumpled behind closed doors. But Victoria has never seen it. She's morned him everyday and yet that girl never went without. Victoria lived in a mansion with every luxtury. Victoria is a decent person she supposed. Of course, she killed in a way that frightened even Johanna. Especially because that was who she created. What's left of him...to see his precious daughter in an area enjoying herself with a bloody axe...

Suppose she failed him there. Or succeeded, depending on how you looked at it.

She shook her head. She hadn't failed. Victoria is human enough to love. Human enough to kill for love. Maybe that's the only thing the two of them have in commo-

A shrill ringning had her out of day dream. She felt her eyebrow tick in annoyance. Of course the only person who ever calls her is Clement. Expect for now, when every rebel victor wants to be best friends forever with her. She stomped toward the nearest phone and rolled her eyes at the small 'DISTRICT FOUR' lighting up her landline. 

Just what she needed to hear. Finnick's stupid voice. As if she hasn't been hearing it on repeat for days. 

She picked it up and held it against her ear with an agressive, "What do you want now, Finnick?".

She wasn't prepeared for the harsh breathing on the end of the line. She rolled her eyes, another one of Finnick's panic attacks. Cause she'd help him through it like always but sometimes she wished he'd call Katniss first. 

She sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose. "Count it out and breathe".

She wasn't prepared for the sob followed by "You left me".

She felt her stomach flip and then sink in dread. The hurt in her voice. Since when are they honest about feelings?. She'd never say something so raw to her. Johanna bit her lip and cackled. "I hardly left you. You're nearly twenty. You're an adult now. You have your own house, and own life Victoria".

Guilt filled her. She was supposed to say the exact opposite of that. She nearly banged her head on the wall behind her in frustration. 

Silence and then...

"I...Liam said that we're going to be married. That we don't get a choice. That we can't...I want to live in Seven".

She found herself repressing the word Why?.

Why would anyone want to live here?. Here where nearly every tree she sees, she thinks she might find his body hanging from a branch, rope wrapped around his neck. Not to mention if Victoria doesn't go along with it, then she'll literally die. And then what would Reed think of her?...

She tusked. "Listen to me Victoria.  You're still in the game and this is apart it. You need to know that they're watching y-BEEP"

The dial tone felt like a knife to her gut. She hoped that didn't cost her but it'd prove to Victoria that they're watching and listening and that she doesn't have a choice. She's saved her in theory from doing anything rash. From getting herself killed. Johanna just hoped it wouldn't cost her anything. That that phone call hadn't cost them both anything. 

Although suppose theres nothing she can do about it now. She then snorted in amusement at herself and put on her best Finnick intimiation voice. "Get over it, Johanna".

And then she laughed manically, the sound echoing around the empty mansion.