Saverio

Part 32 - fail

HONOR MAEVE

I've had some time alone.

Time to think, to accept.

But it's all so hard.

I've been in a "dream" for over ten months. It felt so real too.

So knowing all of it was fake.

I can't even comprehend words.

They've both been good to me. They've both cared for me.

Alec has avoided talking to me about my dreams and instead focused on the future ahead.

He's been picking out jobs and a place for me to live.

It's all been so good, but quite difficult. I lived with him. Now suddenly I live alone.

I loved him with everything in my heart. Now he doesn't love me.

It's definitely hard seeing Saverio.

I saw his dead body.

For months, all I saw was him and it ruined me.

I was afraid because I thought I kept seeing Saverio, even though he's dead.

But that was just me awakening from a coma, I was in for over ten months.

I can tell it's hard for Saverio as well.

Before all... this happened. I was a different person.

I was challenging, in love with him, brave women.

Now I'm a sweet mother, who loves her husband Alec, and tellers on him through everything

Even if non of that's true.

My mindset is still there.

In places where it can't be.

Truth is. I don't know how I'm going to handle living when ten months were taken away from me so quickly.

And all that happened in those ten months were fake.

This is going to be so hard.

I've had the whole day to myself, and Alec informed me that Saverio would be coming over to the hospital to have a chat with me.

My nerves have been kicking in all day.

What could he want to say?

He just walked in now. I can tell he's nervous himself, so that makes me more comfortable.

Neither of us have really spoken since I found out yesterday.

We've both been quite silent.

I'm led on the bed, and he's sat in the chair besides me.

Neither of us are making eye contact and an awkward silence fills the air.

That's when he starts moving in his chair and finally makes direct eye contact with me.

We hold a stare for a moment.

Nobody speaking.

Then he speaks up. Finally.

"How's your day been?" He speaks quietly to me.

I hold my stare with him once again.

I've been in a hospital!

"Fine. Just had some checkups and the crap food they serve"