Facing My Demons (Devil's Right Hand MC #1)

Chapter 14

Clove's POV

It felt so good to finally tell Wolf the whole truth last night and even better to see he still believes me. Even throughout all of my ugly parts, he never judges me. It does hurt that he judges himself, though. I never associated him with Jesse in my mind and I can almost promise I never will.

Once again I wake up before he does, so I turn to stare at him. Call me a creep, I'll gladly take that title because watching him sleep peacefully gives me a little sense of peace.

My nightmares are slowly getting better as I am down to one or two a night and have not woken up scratching or screaming for two nights in a row. It may be a small accomplishment to most people, but to me, this is huge.

As I get out of bed to go to the bathroom, his phone dings. For a moment I question if I should get it because I never want to overstep my bounds, we have only been together a few days after all. However, the more logical part of my brain wins out because it could be about his mom, a club emergency, or a work emergency so I may need to wake him up. Lord knows he would never wake up on his own to a simple text tone.

Before I can talk myself out of it, I pick up his phone and see a text message from Bear. As my eyes scan the notification on his phone my heart drops into my stomach. He told them!

Bear: I am working on getting into Jesse's work laptop now since his personal was clean. I have also found 3 NDAs his company has signed with single women in their 20s. 

I asked him to not tell anyone what I told him in CONFIDENCE and he has the nerve to have his little murder club looking into Jesse when I specifically asked him not to. I am not even sure what happened to me and I know my conscious cannot handle Jesse's blood on my hands.

Anger courses through me as I think about what he has told them. They definitely know about my assault but do they know about my suicide attempt? About Faith and Jesse making me think it didn't happen? About my abortion? Oh God, they can't know about that.

Before I can think any more, I act. He had no right to spread my business around, even if I know deep down it is his way of protecting me.

"Here!" I scream throwing the phone at him, "Bear says he found some dirt on Jesse." Anger seeps out of my pours as he wakes up startled and then quickly realizes what is going on once he sees the text message from Bear.

"You went through my phone?" he asks which only fuels my anger.

"You got a message and I checked it!" I yell even louder, I am sure I have woken up the entire clubhouse by now but I don't give a damn, "I was worried it may be about your mom since it was so early so excuse the hell outta me for caring. I promise not to do that again."

I soon see regret register on his face but it is too little too late. He knows how hard it was for me to open up to him and then he goes and spreads my trauma around like it's high school gossip.

"Calm down, CC. You know I told Blade about the assault," he tries to reason but it only makes it worse.

"Yes Wolf, I knew you told BLADE but the person messaging you is not Blade. I also had no idea you told them who did it after I explicitly asked you to leave the club out of it."

"We already suspected Jesse before you told me, they were already looking into him before you confirmed it."

"My god! How long have they known my shit, Wolf? I thought you brought it to Blade after I came here but you make it sound like they already knew something was up." My accusation causes him to look down at the bed and I feel as if my head is going to pop off. This fucker played me.