The Lies I Believed

I'm Not Delusional!

"Lexi, what are you getting at?"

I only stared down at him and crossed my arms.

"I asked that, because it didn't look like that this morning." I raised a brow. "With Jenni? Seriously? It could have been anyone, but you chose her."

Asher's eyes flickered down for a second. I knew it! I wasn't fooling myself! I know exactly what I saw. Now all he has to do is tell the truth. Karli was right. How am I going to show people I'm really okay, if I just sit back and let bad things happen?

"Are you going to tell me all about it or am I going to have to start reminding you? I know there's something you're not telling me."

"...Maybe you're right," he finally muttered.

"I know I am," I snapped. "I just want to know why we had to have this conversation for you to admit it?"

"Do we really have to do this now? I mean, Lexi, you already think you saw something. There's no need for me--"

"I'M NOT DELUSIONAL!" I screeched and jumped off his desk. He leaned back, so he wouldn't get hit. "I know what I saw, Asher. I saw you and Jenni. Why would I imagine you with someone I hate?"

"I can't tell you about something that never happened."

"Are you really going to do this to me?! I worked too hard to get away from the crap Luca was doing to me! Why would I want to ruin what I thought we had with thoughts of you prancing around with someone you claim to hate?"

Tears were streaming down my face. I've never cried while arguing with Asher. He was usually able to calm me down before it got that far. He can't stop me now. I need to know what I saw. If it's nothing, then why is he avoiding talking about it? Why isn't he lying to me and reassuring me that I saw wrong and that I was tired?

"You have got to be kidding me!" Asher finally broke. He stood up and got in my face. I hate when he does that. "Every single time I'm with someone you don't like, you always come to me with some wild story about how you saw us doing something. What have you got against me, huh? What do you have against the world?"

"I don't have anything against anyone!"

"Are you sure? It seems like it. I can't even relax with my friends without you thinking I'm up to no good. I told you I would forever be by your side. I'd cherish you."

"Oh, but you like Jenni the whore. You can't get over her!"

"She's not a whore!"

"Yes, she is."

"No, she isn't."

"Yes, she is."

"I love you and only you. Always." Asher tried to calm himself down. I only stared up at him in triumph. "What's with that look?"

"...If you love me and nothing happened," I started. "Why are you defending her when what I said is true? You told me yourself."

"I--"

"Don't." I moved away from his desk and walked to the door. "If you...I thought you loved me. I love you. You always wanted to protect me. I guess you failed this time."

"Lexi, it's not at all what you think. I promise." Asher sighed and walked around the desk. "I would love to tell you what's going on, but...you wouldn't understand."

"You could always try explaining yourself right now."

"I can't..."

"Well..." I smiled. "I guess you're taking the couch tonight."