Charlie and Nick Fanfic - PG13 Version

Absence

Charlie Spring was having a rotten week. Not only did he have to cope with Nick's absence, work was dreadful and Tao was persistant in driving Charlie to madness. The texts had been flooding in since Nick left for Paris. Tao wanted to get together every single day as though they were still kids with the time and the luxury. At first, Charlie had been concerned, perhaps Tao and Elle were fighting or Tao and Aled were fighting. After only two days of Tao practically clinging to him, Charlie inquired about such issues.

"No, everything's fine," Tao replied before his eyes narrowed and his face soured. "Why do you assume I'm fighting with someone? Am I that difficult to get along with?"

Charlie shrugged his slender shoulders, wishing he hadn't said anything.

"To be honest, I'm a little worried about you. We all are," Tao confessed.

Charlie forced a laugh. "All of you need to get lives and stop focusing on mine. There is nothing to worry about. I'm doing great. Fantastic even."

Tao rolled his eyes, aware that Charlie wasn't about to open up to him about anything. Charlie could be on fire and he wouldn't say a word, afraid to annoy or disturb anyone. "Okay, well, I'm here if you need to talk."

But Charlie didn't want to talk, not to Tao, not to his other friends. To some extent, Charlie didn't even want to talk to Nick. Everyone would only worry, and to Charlie, that worry only aggravated his disorders. For years, he had been working on his eating disorder and depression. He couldn't tell the people he loved that all of that work was for nothing. He was cutting himself again, and he knew they would never forgive him for falling back into this old pattern. With Nick in Paris for his brother's wedding, Charlie got away with skipping meals.

On the fourth day of Nick's absence, Charlie sussed out why Tao was coming around everyday.

"Nick told you to babysit me, didn't he?"

Tao didn't bother to deny it as he cooked Charlie dinner. "He didn't use the word 'babysit.'"

Now, it was the seventh day since Charlie had last seen or spoke to Nick. Silently, he sat on the couch in the flat they shared, knees drawn up to his chest as tears trickled down his cheeks. He hated himself and he knew that soon enough, Nick would hate him too. Charlie had been so, so careless, acting without thinking and crossing a line he couldn't reel back from.

Charlie's phone began to rumble, vibrating on the coffee table.

"Fuck off, Tao!" Charlie growled as he grabbed the phone. When he saw Nick's picture fill his screen, Charlie was hit by waves of both glee and dread.

After a long sigh, Charlie swallowed at the lump in his throat and picked up the call. In his usual sadly shy tone, Charlie said, "hi."

"Hi," Nick replied with an anxious chuckle.