Middle Fingers Up // Billy Hargrove x Reader

𝑪𝑯𝑨𝑷𝑻𝑬𝑹 𝑻𝑯𝑰𝑹𝑻𝒀-𝑬𝑰𝑮𝑯𝑻

You, unsurprisingly, didn't begin to feel better until a few weeks after what happened. You'd managed to avoid him so far and only risked seeing him when you went home for clothes or to do laundry. The ring he gave you had been tossed into the woods at Eddie's trailer, hopefully to never be seen again. It was honestly annoying that Billy had laid claim to your favourite expression - flipping people off. It made it so that you thought of him when you did it now. Ugh.

Crashing at Eddie's wasn't a permanent solution, but it worked for now. Still, you couldn't seem to shake the ache in your chest or the way that when you were alone, your mind drifted back to the moment that was haunting you. 

Sometimes, you didn't even have to be alone for it, and it wasn't always that memory that plagued you. It was the good ones as well. The way he smiled at you in the mornings, all sleepy and half-awake. The way he would stroke circles on your back to help you sleep when you couldn't. The way he'd look so carefree as he drove around town, blaring his music out. The good memories were just as painful, if not more so. Coming to terms with the fact it was probably all bullshit was hurting you. Big time.

You'd noted his car had been returned in pristine condition while getting more clothes from your room, and debated trashing it again just out of spite, but figure this time it'll end up with you in a cell. Would it be worth it? Maybe. But you refrain anyway.

There was news on the tour as well. The band would be leaving in a week to tour some of the Southern states and get their name out there. It wasn't much, but it was better than the dive bar in Hawkins. 

You still hadn't told your parents - you wanted to, but didn't know how. When Eddie dropped you off, he all but ordered you to tell them today while you were here. He was right and you knew you were just putting it off for fear they wouldn't let you go, but since you were legally an adult there was also nothing they could do about it.

When you're finished packing a duffel bag full of clean clothes, you elicit a soft sigh before heading downstairs. "Mom? Dad? Can I talk to you a sec?" You call out to them as you head into the kitchen. A moment later they appear with curious glances, but say nothing as they perch on the stools at the kitchen island, across from where you were stood leaning on it.

"What's up, kiddo?" Your dad asks, resting his elbows on the countertop. You still hadn't planned what you were going to say but, fuck it - right? Better out than in.

"I'm going on tour with Eddie." You blurt out, rushing to explain further at their shocked expressions. "It's only for a couple of months, but I have got to get out of this town. I'm going nowhere here.." It was partially the truth, you supposed. You did want to get out of this town, and you really weren't going to go anywhere in life while stuck here. Mostly though, you just wanted to get away from Billy. If you had to interact with him ever again, you'd certainly be out of town for a while. 

In prison. 

For 25 to life.

"But honey, what about your job? And us?" Your mom complains, tone almost whiny as she scrambled for excuses to keep you around.

"My job... at a smoothie making place..?" You wanted to curl up and exist in a place she hadn't asked you that question. Suffice to say you hadn't told her you'd been fired for not showing up lately. "I, umm... I'm not bothered about working there. It was just temporary anyway. And with regards to you guys - it's not for too long. I'll be home in time for Christmas."

She sighs and dips her head into her hands, though your father was being eerily silent about the whole thing. He rests his chin on his closed hands and regards you closely for a moment. "If it's going to make you happy so I don't have to watch you moping around all the time? Well, I'm all for it. So long as you're safe, of course."

"I can't believe you're okay with this!" Your mom drops her hands and shoots him a glare. "What if something happens to her?"

"Can we not talk about me like I'm not right here?" You groan, pushing up from your elbows to plant your palms against the cool marble counter. "I know you're worried, but I'll be fine. I'm with freaking Eddie for Christ's sake, you know he'd never let anything bad happen."

Your mom rounds the counter and puts her hands on your shoulders, eyes glistening with threatening tears. Oh God, please don't start blubbering.

"Fine. But you have to call us every day. I mean it... Ooh-- And I want a detailed itinerary of everywhere you're travelling to and on what days so I know where you are. Okay?" She sighs, fingers toying with the ends of your hair as her tears begin to fall. "I just want you to be happy. If this is what that takes..." Trailing off, your dad comes up behind you and draws you under his arm. 

"A few months away might do you some good. Put a smile back on that face." His gruff voice is interrupted by a beep from outside. Your ride was back to collect you, thank God. 

"That's Eddie. I better go, but I promise I'll come back to say goodbye before we leave." Pulling free of your parents overbearing grasp, you clear your throat and offer them a forced, small smile. Your mom kisses your forehead, spewing about how much she loves you and will miss you as you leave the house. "Love you too, mom."

You were almost laughing as you closed the door, knowing deep down their affections were heartwarming and not as annoying as you pretended they were.

But whatever laughter dies on your lips the moment you turn around to the van and see Billy stood across the street. It was the first time you'd seen him and any inclination you might be doing okay since that night was like dust to the wind the moment your eyes fell on him.

His found you as well. That pit in your stomach rises once more, the feeling of dread taking over every inch of you. Would he come over? Would he try to apologise, or explain?

Nope. 

There's a look in his eye that resembles regret, but you know it couldn't be that. If he regretted it, he wouldn't have done it in the first place. But the look is as fleeting as his apparent affection for you since he just silently goes back to cleaning his car.

Bile rose in your throat and left an acrid taste on your tongue. A frown deepens the creases of your forehead as you storm over to Eddie's van and silently hop in the passenger side. Your friend gives you a look that wordlessly asks if you're okay, and you shake your head.

He pulls out of the driveway quickly after that, hurling down the road to get you away as quickly as he can in hopes it might make you feel better. It doesn't

Adrenaline pulsed through your veins; the anxiety and anger of the moment refusing to leave you alone. You felt nauseous and lightheaded. You almost wanted to cry. It was all too much.

"I can't wait to get out of this fucking place." You grumble, lip quivering as you rest your head on your hand, elbow propped against the door. 

"How'd they take it?"

"Better than I thought, to be honest." You snort, wiping an errant tear that managed to struggle free. You were definitely grateful of the topic change, that was for sure.

"So, you're definitely coming?" He couldn't hide the excitement in his voice, the grin on his lips making him look like a little kid. It grows when you nod to his words and he slaps a hand against the steering wheel. "Fuck yeah! It's gonna be a riot. Just one more week and we're out of here, baby."

"Damn right. I just can't wait to get out of this shithole and onto better things."