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I look out of the train window. The little raindrops that splatter themselves unto the window crash and leave multiple little ones behind. Two other raindrops seem to have some kind race. I smile I would look at those things when I was younger. "Sir?" It startles me. It's the lady with the food. I smile. And order what I want before I grab my book and begin to read. A young woman, probably 6 or 7 years younger than I am sits down in front of me. I look up. I see that she's saring at me like she's expecting something. "Are you selling something?" I ask in confusion. She laughs "no you just seemed I interesting, too interesting to be here with us. I mean everything about you looks expensive." I laugh "I surely hope you're not a pickpocket." She laughs "I'm not the social type to be honest so pardon me if I'm doing this wrong or if I offend you" I say. She shakes her head "no problem," she sticks out her hand "hi I'm Charlotte Burton, nice to meet you" I shake her hand "pleasure to meet you charlotte, my name is clement Cavendish but my father's name is also Clement so everyone calls me Theodore. By the way I knew someone who's last name was also burton" "Are you a real Cavendish" "no I'm a completely synthetic one." I joke "no I am one.... unfortunately" "well don't dwell on family stuff" she responds. "very true." I say. I nod and take a sip of my tea, I burn my throat because I don't hae patience. We arrive. The air feels different from the city air. City air is full of flashy things. Here you it feels like you're in a dream, your senses don't have an overload and that makes me feel very weird. I begin to walk out of the station and begin to stroll through the streets when I hear someone yelling something. I look in the direction. Two poorly dressed men walk towards me. One is fat and the other one is utterly small. "Look who's in town, the little prince is back" the little one says. I some "I would've never guessed that you two would still be stuck here. I thought you'd be smarter than staying here. I'm impressed by your stamina off staying dumb." I cross my arms. The little one, his name is Max, looks at me like he wants to kill me. "You live off off your father's money" "oh really do I? I have four PhDs, I teach at two of the best universities of the world and I have one business that's prospering. On top of that I have an organization for children of people stuck in poverty. What do you fucking cunts have?" They look shocked "yeah bummer right? the quiet kid isn't that quiet anymore, I learned that while you were busy trying to understand basic biology in secondary school. My outfit cost probably more than two months of your salary. Tell me what do you do?" They still look shocked. "I work on my daddy's farm" say Thomas (the fat one) "oh and I live off my dad's back, sure! and what about you Max?" He coughs "I'm a cleaner" I smile "hey I respect cleaners but seriously man. I'm the one who could bully you. But anyways how have your lives been?" Max looks puzzled "but we were enemies." " That's a big word for fights we had while we were children, I've had bigger fights to fight" he laughs "I've got a beautiful daughter, but her mother and I aren't together"answers max "almost married to a beautiful woman" says Thomas. I grab two hondred pounds notes. "Give your fiancee something beautiful and give your kid something to remember, don't use these for something else or I will find out." They nod.I smile and begin to walk to the hospital.

I arrive at the hospital. "Cavendish" I say. The assistant looks at me. "I know you from something" she says. I shake my head. "I don't think so" "nevermind, your father is in 204" "thank you" I walk towards the room my mom is standing outside. She looks confused. "Mom" she looks at me "oh Theo its so good to see you again, we haven't spoken for so long" "mom the last time we spoke was a week ago over the telephone" she looks confused "oh of course that was you* she says "I thought it was your brother" I don't have the heart to tell her Basil killed himself when he was seventeen. "Mom have you taken your medications the last days?" "Of course I have, Basil" I smile but she doesn't know she's hurting me. It feels as if I'm not important enough to remember. We enter the room. My father is laying in the bed. He beckons me and grabs my hand. I feel his coldness. His wrinkles feel new, he hasn't held my hand in more than five years. "Promise me you'll take care of your mom" I nod "I'm going to Basil." I looks up. One of the lights is flickering, I feel myself boiling over. "Fuck you dad." "What?" "You heard me, I don't feel bad for you. You're still the bastard that hits mom if she does something wrong. You're still the one who fucking kept insisting how great my brother was. Even after he was gone. You were the one insisting that I should be a carbon copy of Basil. I'm not anyone's copy okay dad? I'm me and I'll always be me. Why couldn't you understand that? Why couldn't you love me? You don't understand anything. You'll never understand because you're about to die. And I'm not gonna sit here and pretend to cry about the man who sent me away to a boarding school when I was bullied. Because you thought "he'll toughen up in boarding school" The man who didnt do anything when they beat me bloody in my sleep in boarding school. Fuck you. I could've died if they'd continued dad" "you've always been too provocative" "they were a bunch of white supremacists what should I have done? See you still don't get my fucking points. You didn't even love me when I came home with a PhD from oxford. How the fuck am I supposed to make you happy? I wo't ever make you happy will I? And Sure I'll be sad when you'll die but I won't give you the satisfaction of knowing how much I love you. you fucking son of a bitch." tears flow out of my eyes, I grab my hat. "I need to smoke" I say. I don't, I actually just need to go away from that suffocating place my parents put me in whenever I'm with them. I walk away. I look at myself in the reflection on the glass wall. I look at myself. I look very thin. I don't know why that is. I wrap my coat tighter around my body. My blackish curls sway in the wind and tend to get in my light blue eyes. My skin has a golden glow to it, I look more closely at myself, I look at my nose I've always hated my nose, some people would call it a Jewish nose but I'm fairly certain I have no Jewish ancestors. I do know that my mom is half Egyptian though. Anyway My mom always wanted me to cut my hair but I like it semi long. I look at my cigarette. I notice that my hands are completely ruined because I wash them too much, they also look too big and too skinny it's almost as if I'm becoming a skeleton. I laugh what the fuck am I doing here I have bigger problems back home. I start to cough it hurts like hell, Shit what is happening? I walk back into the hospital and wait in front of the room.


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