My Home Is Always With You {10}

Chapter 6: "Ask Jeeves"

Liz and Dean are outside of their motel, Liz is leaning against the Impala, while Dean's fixing the headlights when Sam walks over with two small cups of coffee and Sam says, "Individually brewed. Technology, man." Dean grabs the small cup and says, "Real men don't drink out of cups this small." Dean smells the coffee and continues to say, "What is that-- 'cinnamon roll'?" Sam says, "It's, uh, "glazed donut." Look, man, if you don't want it, I--" Dean waves his hand and says, "Nah, it's -- got it." Dean sips the coffee and continues to say, "So, any leads on the scanner or the... interweb?" Sam says, "Nothing-- not even a cat up a tree." Dean says, "So right when we're ready to jump back into it, it, uh, goes radio silence." Sam says, "Murphy's Law." Dean says, "Well, Murphy's a douche." Liz says, "Hey, do you guys feel like taking a detour to Connecticut?" The boys look at her and say, "What?" Liz holds up a flip phone and says, "I found it in the glovebox." Sam says, "One of ours?" Liz says, "It's one of my dad's. And, in total, 27 messages. The only one that counts is from two days ago. Apparently, my dad's been named a beneficiary in Bunny LaCroix's will." Dean says, "Bunny LaWho?" Liz says, "Attorney said she's an heiress, and my dad's presence or next of kin is being requested in New Canaan. I figured we go." Sam says, "How did Bobby know an heiress?" Liz says, "My dad had secrets. Secrets that he didn't even tell me. So, you guys ready for a road trip?" Later, they arrive at Bunny LaCroix's residence and its pretty fancy. Sam says, "Wow." They get out the car and Sam says, "Think we're a little underdressed? I mean, the fed threads are in the trunk." Dean says, "You kidding me? For once, we don't have to wear suits. You're lucky my waistband's not elastic." They walk up to the front door and ring the doorbell, it plays Beethoven. A maid answers the door and says, "May I help you?" Liz says, "I'm Elizabeth Singer and these two are Sam and Dean Winchester. We're here on behalf of my father Bobby Singer." The maid says, "Mr. Singer won't be coming?" Dean says, "No. He passed away." The maid says, "Oh, I'm sorry to hear that." Sam says, "Uh, condolences for your loss, too." The maid says, "Thank you. Well, you just missed the funeral, but the family's relaxing inside, if you'd like to join." They walk inside into the main room and the maid clears her throat for everyone and she says, "Allow me to introduce, Elizabeth Singer, Sam and Dean Winchester." A woman stands up with a smile and says, "Sam and Deam Winchester of the Westchester Winchesters?" Sam says, "U-uh, n-- no. I don't think there's... any relation. Sorry." The woman says, "No matter. You two are... adorable. I'm Heddy, Bunny's cousin, and this is my sister, Beverly." Beverly says, "Charmed, I'm sure." Heddy says, "And that's Bunny's youngest brother, Stanton-- "Stan" for short." Stan says, "Come on in, fellas and lady. Join the mourning." Heddy says, "And his child bride, Amber." Amber smiles and says, "Go babe!" Stan says, "Babe, don't. You're breaking my concentration." Heddy says, "And then there's Dash. That's the baby of the family. He's Bunny's great-nephew-- Harvard business." Dash says, "How do you guys know Aunt Bunny?" Liz says, "We didn't personally know her. My dad Bobby Singer, did." Beverly says, "Bobby? Never heard of him. But you can fill us in over the weekend, huh?" Dean says, "The weekend?" Heddy says, "Didn't the attorney tell you? Service was today, and the reading of the will tomorrow." Beverly says, "Oh, but you're welcome to spend the night. All the rooms sleep two. Or three." Heddy slaps Dean's butt and Liz quietly laughs at Dean being uncomfortable. Amber says, "Where's Colette?" A new voice appears and says, "She quit. Poor dear was so distraught over Mrs. LaCroix's passing. Went off to find herself." Heddy says, "Ashram in India?" The butler says, "Uh, clown college in Sarasota." Heddy says, "Good choice." The butler walks up to the three and says, "May I have a word with you three in the hall in five minutes?" They nod and Beverly walks up to them and says, "So, Sam... tell me... do you... work out?" Liz and Dean smile knowingly at Sam. They then go speak with the butler and he says, "My apologies for being so oblique back there, but I'm doing you three a favor." Sam says, "O-okay." The butler says, "As you know, Mrs. LaCroix bequeathed something to your Mr. Singer. But the reading of the will isn't until tomorrow, and I would hate for you to have to stick around and be forced to-- well, mingle with the family." Dean says, "Don't worry, Alfred. We know which one the shrimp fork is. Kind of." The butler says, "Oh, Mr. Winchester. If you're implying that I don't think you're good enough, i-it's quite the contrary. You're far too good. The LaCroix family is-- well... how shall I say this politely? Money-grubbing leeches." Dean says, "What are you talking about? I thought they were all loaded." The butler says, "Loaded-- yes. Rich-- no. The recession hit everyone one of them, and I'm afraid if they knew what Bunny left you, those vultures would try to stake claim. And since the attorney kindly agreed to a hand-off, you don't have to be subjected to their scrutiny." The butler hands Liz a small package and Liz says, "Do you have any idea how Bunny and my dad knew each other?" The butler says, "Not in the slightest. Um, now, if there's nothing else, shall I have Olivia show you out?" Dean says, "No, no. That, uh-- we got it. Thanks." Liz opens the package and takes out a large cross and Dean says, "Huh. Kind of fancy to leave a guy like Bobby." Liz realizes something and says, "You guys thinking what I'm thinking?" Dean looks at Liz, realizes, and says, "If Bunny was banging Bobby, then maybe these rocks are real." Later, they go to a pawn shop and the pawn shop guy says it's not real and Dean says, "What do you mean it's not real? The old bag was rolling in it?" The pawn shop guy says, "Well, looks like the old bag's got a soft spot for fake rubies and cubic zirconium. This is interesting, though. It's a key." Liz grabs the key, looks at the boys, and says, "A key to what?" Dean says, "There's one way to find out-- ask Jeeves." Later, they're back at the LaCroix residence and see a cop car and they ring the doorbell, and the butler opens the door and Dean says, "Everything okay?" The butler says, "Not really." They walk into the house and the butler says, "I presume you three left something behind? I'll check the front closet for... burlap." Dean says, "I got news for you, Mr. Belvedere-- the jacket's canvas." A man walks up to them and says, "Uh. You three were here earlier?" Dean says, "Yeah. Who wants to know?" The man says, "Detective Howard, New Cannan P.D. congratulations, guys. You're now officially murder suspects." Liz says, "I'm sorry. What? Who was murdered?" Detective Howard says, "Yeah, Bunny LaCroix's brother Stanton was killed this evening. His body's just gone to the morgue." Dean says, "And you think--" Detective Howard cuts Dean off and says, "I don't know what to think. And that's why you three and anyone who else stepped foot in this house today is being detained for questioning." They walk into a room where the rest of the other LaCroix's are and Heddy says, "Beverly, let go of me! It's so obvious she's guilty." Dash says, "You're off your rocker, old lady." Heddy's offended and says, "'Old lady'?! I-- I'm 39." Dash sarcastically says, "And you have been since '03." Heddy says, "How-- how dare you." Sam says, "I'm sorry to interrupt, but-- but who's guilty?" Heddy looks at them and says, "The town slut, Amber. She killed Stan." Dash says, "And what's her motive, 'murder, she wrote'?" Heddy says, "Oh, everyone knows that Amber was sleeping around. She wanted to leave Stan, but her prenup was ironclad, so she killed him." Dean says, "Sounds logical." Heddy says, "Well, unless you believe that ridiculous story that she's been peddling. "A ghost killed Stanton"-- honestly." Liz says, "Uh, a ghost?" Heddy says, "She's claiming that Bunny's late husband, Lance, did it. Have you ever heard such a thing? What a panic! So stupid." Dash points his finger into Heddy's face and angrily says, "You're nutty as a squirrel on those synthetic hormones." Heddy says, "'Nutty'?" How appalling of you. Don't they teach you manners in Harvard?" Liz pulls the boys aside and quietly says, "So, uh... looks like we might have a case here. Vengeful spirit?" Dean nods and says, "Yeah, think we can get to the car, get the EMF?" Sam scoffs and says, "Not with, uh, Detective friendly. Not a chance. Guess we're gonna have to go old-school." Dean says, "All right. Cold spots it is." Liz says, "Yeah. Okay, you two stay here and keep an eye on the LaCroix's and I'll have a look around." Dean nods and says, "All right." Liz leaves the room and walks down a hallway and walks over to the crime scene and looks over to see a bookshelf to see a symbol of the key and she takes out the key and holds it up to see it's exactly the same. Liz grabs the book, but it opens to reveal a door and she sees a key slot and she inserts the key, and it opens a secret passageway, and she softly says, "Cool." Liz walks in and uses her hand as a light and walks down and sees a bunch of antiques and a plate of an old half eaten sandwich. Liz looks down to see a pair of feet rolled up into a rug and hears footsteps and shows her light and she sees Olivia and Olivia says, "Elizabeth?" Liz says, "Olivia?" Liz sees that Olivia has been crying and she says, "Thank God. I thought you were him." Liz says, "Him who?" Olivia says, "Phillip-- the butler. He locked me in here because I wouldn't lie to the detective about what I saw." Liz says, "What did you see?" Olivia's voice cracks and says, "I saw him roll Colette's body in a rug." Liz says, "Clown college Colette? The butler killed her?" Olivia shakes her head and says, "No, no. He just-- he just hid her." Liz says, "Then who killed her?" Olivia says, "I know this is gonna sound crazy, but I saw it with my own eyes." Liz says, "Let me guess-- Lance's ghost." Olivia says, "No. Bunny's." Liz is confused and she walks back into the room with Olivia and the boys walk up to her and Sam says, "Hey. So?" Liz says, "You guys seen the butler?" Sam says, "No. Why?" Liz says, "If anybody has answers, it's him. We're dealing with two vengeful spirits. Apparently, Aunt Bunny had a bee in her bonnet, as well." Dean says, "Uh, husband-and-wife tag-team killer ghosts?" Liz nods and says, "The key... is to a hidden attic." Sam says, "Why would Bunny want Bobby to have a key to her attic?" Liz says, "I don't know. It gets weirder. I found Olivia and Colette locked inside." Dean says, "Clown college Colette?" Liz says, "Yeah, but she ain't studying balloon animals. She's dead." Sam says, "Now, what does the butler have to do with all this?" Liz says, "He's the one who locked them in there. Now, I don't know why, but he's covering for the spooks. He's acting like their Renfield." Dean says, "All right. We got to find him. Me and Liz we'll take downstairs, Sam you take upstairs." Sam says, "All right." Liz and Dean split up and Liz opens a room to see Phillip and he says, "How can I help you Ms. Singer?" Liz says, "What are you doing hiding dead maids in secret rooms?" Phillip says, "I know it all looks rather... peculiar, but I can explain." Phillip tells Liz the truth and she says, "So, you hid Colette's body in the attic so that she wouldn't steal Bunny's thunder?" Phillip says, "I couldn't stand the thought of overshadowing Mrs. LaCroix's funeral with another death. She deserved a proper farewell. I owed it to her." Liz says, "That's insane." Phillip says, "No, Ms. Singer. That's loyalty." Liz phone buzzes and it's a text from Dean and it says, "Just found Phillip. Dead." Liz is confused, if Phillip's dead then who was she just speaking to. Liz looks at 'Phillip' and he grabs her and throws her across the room, and she sees Phillip shed his skin and she knows that their dealing with a shapeshifter not a ghost. Liz calls Dean and he says, "Liz." Liz says, "Dean." Dean says, "Yeah?" Liz says, "It's not a ghost." Dean says, "What?" Liz says, "It's a shapeshifter." Liz and Sam go meet up with Dean in the kitchen to see the real Phillip dead. Sam says, "So, the shifter's getting its jollies by impersonating dead people." Dean says, "Yeah. First Bunny, then Lance, now Phillip. Guess we can rule out 'the butler did it.'" Sam says, "And the creep just shed, so now it could be anybody. Even you two." Liz says, "Or you. We need to find some silver." They then hear a gasp and sees Olivia and she's looking at Phillip's dead body and she says, "Oh, my God." Dean says, "Hey. He was like that when we found him." Olivia pants and says, "Who did this?" Liz softly says, "We don't know yet, okay? Now, listen. Calm down. I know you think he was working with ghosts, but there's something way worse going on here." Olivia says, "Worse than... what is going on?" Dean says, "If you want to help, then help. Can you do that?" Olivia opens a case of silverware, and she says, "Why do you need the silverware?" Sam says, "For protection." Sam grabs a butter knife and Olivia says, "Butter knives?" Dean says, "Trust us-- there's a method to out madness." Sam hands the knife to Olivia and says, "Can you, uh, hold this?" They see that Olivia's not the shifter and Liz grabs a knife and then Sam hands Dean a knife and their all not shifters and Sam says, "All right. Let's do this." The three of them split up. Liz walks back into the main room to see everyone, and she walks over to the boys and Sam says, "'Grey gardens' cleared." Dean says, "Okay, well, so is Dash and Amber. They're a thing, by the way." Liz says, "That's not surprising." The boys look at her and she says, "What? It's not. Amber being married to an old guy like Stanton when she can just be with a young guy like Dash. I can read people pretty well." Sam says, "Alright, so, that's everyone. Except for--" Sam gets cut off by Olivia's scream and they follow it to find the Detective dead in the toilet and Dean says, "Well, we got a floater." Sam says, "Great." They walk over to the body and Dean says, "Yeah, he's a goner." Heddy says, "Drowned in a toilet? How filthy!" Bevery says, "What kind of monster would do such a thing?" Heddy looks at Olivia and she says, "Don't look at me. I was just trying to pee." Dean says, "Okay, hold on. Before we start pointing fingers--" Heddy cuts Dean off and says, "Amber has motive. She killed the detective because she knew that it was just a matter of time before he figured out, she killed Stan." Dash claps his hands and says, "Bravo, Rizzoli. You solved the case. Want to weight in, too, Isles?" Amber says, "I didn't kill Stanton or the detective, and I have proof." Sam says, "Okay, guys--" Amber cuts Sam off and she says, "My alibi is in this room." Dean leans towards Liz and Sam and says, "Ooh. Wait for it." Dash says, "Amber couldn't have killed the detective, 'cause she was with me." Heddy gasps and Dash grabs Amber's hand and says, "We're in love." Amber says, "We're... sleeping together." Beverly says, "I knew it." Heddy looks at Dash and says, "Well, then, you have motive, too. You offed Stan because you were diddling his wife." Dash says, "Ohh. The old lady doth protest too much. You're only pointing the finger to distract from your own guilt, and you probably got baby Jane to help." Beverly gasps and she says, "Well, I never! I'm leaving!" As Beverly goes to walk away, Dean grabs her arm and says, "All right, hang on. First of all, who talks like that? Second of all, no one's leaving, okay?" Beverly seductively says, "Oh, get your hands off me, young man." Beverly pushes herself onto Dean and he's uncomfortable and he says, "Okay, see, I don't trust anyone, and leaving makes you look guilty." Dean pushes Beverly off him, and she pouts. Liz says, "Dean is right, okay? We have four corpses now." Amber says, "Four corpses?" Dean says, "Yes. You can add Phillip and Colette to the list." Heddy says, "Clown college Colette? But I thought--" Dean cuts her off and he says, "She's dead, all right? She's dead." Liz says, "And we can't help you unless you stop arguing with one another. You need to trust us." Dash scoffs and says, "Trust you? Uh, we don't even know you. Look, I'm trying to be objective here, but we've had countless family functions before, and even though we wanted to kill one another, we never did." Heddy says, "Dash is right. Our get-togethers never end in murder. The only thing different this time around is you." Dean says, "Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Okay, first of all, whoa. Whatever you're suggesting--" Dash points a gun at them and says, "You three!" The three-woman gasp and Dash says, "Let's go. I... hunt pheasant." Liz and the boys walk out the room and into another room and he says, "Sit tight until the cops get here." Dean says, "You don't want to do this. We are your best shot at making it out of here alive." Sam says, "We're not the bad guys, Dash." Dash says, "I beg to differ. You're wearing flannel." Dash locks the door and Dean takes out a knife to open the door and it bends and he reads the the knife and says, "'Made in Taiwan.' Freakin' stainless steel." Sam says, "So, that's why so one sizzled? They're not even real silver?" Dean sighs and says, "First, cubic zirconium, and now this. Now wonder the rich stay rich. How we gonna kill this thing?" Liz says, "You know, we got silver bullets in the trunk." Dean says, "Yeah, assuming we ever make it out of here." Liz walks up to the door and breaks the lock and says, "I'm gonna go get the bullets." Dean nods and Liz disappears and grabs the guns and the bullets and brings them to the boys and says, "Okay." Sam says, "It's the maid." Liz says, "What?" Dean nods and says, "Yeah, we got played by the maid." Liz walks to where everyone is and steps forward and Olivia shoots her, and the bullet goes through her shoulder, and she groans but is okay. Olivia's shocked that the bullet didn't do anything, and she runs out the room. Liz looks at everyone and says, "Stay here!" Liz goes after Olivia with her gun held high and Olivia appears and shoots Liz again, but this time in the chest and Liz grunts and Olivia keeps shooting at her and Liz shoots her in the head and Olivia falls to the ground dead. Liz then takes out the bullets in her shoulder and chest and she can feel herself heal. Later, everyone leaves the house and Liz, and the boys walk to the car and Dash says, "Guys? Police are on their way. What a mess. I owe you three an apology." Sam says, "Don't sweat it. I mean, you were just protecting your family, and... there's nothing wrong with that." Dash says, "So, I spoke to Aunt Bunny's attorney. He said, outside from the pendant, everything was left to Olivia." Liz says, "Hey, you know what? Speaking of that..." Liz takes out the pendant and gives it to Dash and continues to say, "You guys should keep it. It's a key to the attic." Dash says, "Bobby must have really meant something to Aunt Bunny. How can we repay you?" Dean says, "You know what? Just forget we were ever here." Dash chuckles and says, "But you saved our lives. I want everyone to know what heroes you--" Dean cuts Dash off and says, "Look, pal, the fact that we pulled your bacon out of the fire is nobody's business. Okay? Hey. I'm serious, Izod. Put a pin in it. Or we'll come back for your preppy ass." They get into the Impala and drive away.