❛𝐃𝐎𝐍'𝐓 𝐁𝐄 𝐒𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐄𝐃, 𝐈'𝐌 𝐉𝐔𝐒𝐓 𝐀 𝐌𝐔𝐑𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐄𝐑...❜ | 𝐍𝐨.𝟐

Chapter 6- Anxiety, Anxiety...

Ever since i got that call from the hospital about Emma's casualty, i've been on edge.

My mother died from a gunshot to the head; the last thing i need is Emma going the same way.

She's been off work for a week to recover, and she's definitely noticed me hovering over her like some sort of goddamn spider hanging off a cobweb.

"Can you drive me to work, babe?" Emma asks as she braids her ponytail.

"Do you have to go back today? I mean, maybe you should wait until you feel 100%?"

"I do feel 100%. Plus, Andy said there's cases on cases that are waiting for me in my office."

"Can't you do them from home?"

She turns around and makes herself comfortable using my lap as a chair, "I know you'll miss my beautiful self whilst i'm at work, but if i'm working that means you can too."

I'm lucky that a girl like Emma accepts what i do for a living and doesn't get insanely jealous, and i love my job, but not as much as i love her.

"I'd rather spend all my time with you than dominating people."

"That's sweet, but it doesn't pay the bills." she pecks my lips before heading downstairs to put her shoes on.

I guess my worries will have to lie with myself until my first client comes.

I've never been so unfocused throughout my career as a dominatrix. Any and all feelings i had were put aside as soon as the collar was clasped.

But ever since Emma and Max came into my life, all i do is worry. Worry if they are safe, worry about their health, everything to do with them.

You might not think us domme's have feelings, have anxieties or even have emotions. I was once called a flogging robot.

But dommes have lives. Not many people knew i was married for example.

And not many people know i have a girlfriend with a kid.

The next time you meet a domme, don't assume that their entire world is inviting you into their dungeon and dominating you.

My mind whirls back to the thought of Emma laid on a cold metal floor, bleeding out.

I flick back from scene to scene, from Emma lying there helpless and my mother's body being dragged out of my back garden in a half-open tarp.

I take a step back and place down the wax-play candle i was holding, not trusting myself with its fire-lit flame.

"M-Mistress? Are you okay?"

"I- i'm fine, Chelsea."

"Good because i'm aching for you to drizzle that hot wax all over me..." she bites her lower lip in a devils way. I clear my throat and mind simultaneously, blocking out all thoughts.

"Of course."

I aim for the liquid to paint my submissive's thighs, all the way to the top, when i hear the gunshot again of the fatal blow to the head that killed my mother, which causes me to drop the candle onto the bed, which also lights the bed sheets aflame.

"Crap! Lauren!" i'm dazed in thought as i keep hearing the fatal noise again.

Bang.

Bang.

Bang.

It doesn't stop.

"Lauren, you have to untie me! There's a fire!"

Chelsea's words are muffled by my daydream, drowned out by the sound of ripping flesh deep into a frontal lobe.

Bang.

Bang.

Bang.

"Lauren! Please!"

I'm so fucking stupid. I don't think any dominatrix has ever made that mistake with wax-play candles.

I obviously told Chelsea to not pay me for todays session, or any future ones.

Although i think any Trip Advisor reviews will be going out of the window.

As i'm left alone with my thoughts, we both seem unable to fit in the large square area of the colossal mansion that surrounds me.

My breathing comes in short pants, hitching up and down, up and down.

I shakily grab my cell and call Emma, the only person who can calm my rattling brain.

As i'm about to press her number, my trembling hands drop my phone onto the floor; smashed.

"Fuck! Fuck fuck fuck!" i pace back and forth the length of the hallway, the distance becoming shorter and shorter as seconds pass by.

The banging returns.

Bang.

Bang.

Bang.

He won't stop shooting her until he knows she's dead. I only wish i could have taken the bullets for my hobbled maternal figure.

My mind can't stop racing with the worry for where Emma is.

My body knows she's at work, my mind thinks she's being fatally wounded just as my mum was.

The more times i hear the fatal blows, it feels like blood is pouring out of my ears, painfully.

"Calm down, Lauren, you're being stupid." i shake my hands and breathe slowly.

The images in my head won't go away, no matter how much i beg and plead.

"Go away, go away, go away!" i press my wrists to my temples, trying to out-hurt the damaging pain.

"Lauren? What's wrong?"

The voice of the unknown person to me is blocked out.

Bang.

Bang.

Bang, bang.

"The thoughts won't stop, they won't stop."

"Lauren, i need you to breathe for me, i can't understand what's wrong."

"She's dead, she's dead, she's dead..."

"Who's dead? Lauren, talk to me, please babe?"

My wrists hit my head repeatedly until i can't stand it, the feeling numb.

I can't take it anymore.

The bang.

Bang.

Bang.

Bang.

🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
Believe it or not, this chapter took me days to write 😂 i had so much writers block it's unreal.

I still don't know which book to write:
studentxteacher or boss/employee!

I'm trying my best to please you all with the new book, so i promise i'll find a compromise!

If you haven't voted yet on my conversations page about my next book, please do so now, it'll help a lot with the decision! xx

Thank you so much for reading! <3