Secrecy (Hosie)

Part 81: Weight

"Why do we have to sit in the back?"

Clarke and Hope sit in the back row of seats in the car, while Josie, Lizzie, and Cleo are in the middle row. Alaric and MG occupy the front seats.

Most of the people who know of Hope's identity are with her, so at least she doesn't have to be alone with Clarke.

Hope replies to Clarke nonchalantly, "So I can toss you out the trunk if you cause any trouble."

Clarke chuckles nervously, looking down at the restraints around his wrists.

Hope tries to finally enjoy the peace and—

"I'm just curious. How did you manage to hide your real identity from the entire world for so long?"

Hope groans in annoyance.

So far, they have been on the road for about and three hours.

And Clarke has also been talking her ear off, for three hours.

"And I'm just curious. Do you have an off switch by chance?"

He doesn't even address the remark, "What's your secret? Psychosis? Sociopath? Or is it really just monstrous Mikaelson instincts?"

Josie speaks before Hope even gets the chance, "Do you ever shut up?"

Clarke defends his previous rhetorical question, "Hey, I'm not judging. I was born to be a monster too. It's practically in my DNA."

Hope finally responds, "I'm nothing like you."

"Oh, really? I heard your conversation with the dead zombie witch guy. I know all about your daddy issues. The family drama. The expectations. The loneliness. The anger—"

"If you want me to pity you, you're wasting your breath."

"I don't need your pity. Just want you to understand why I've done all that I have done."

Hope doesn't respond.

And Clarke sighs after a moment.

"But seriously, how'd you do it?"

Hope lets out a frustrated breath, closing her eyes as she feels her headache growing stronger with each word that comes out of Clarke's mouth.

"I mean, you had everyone fooled. Your closest friends, your teachers, your peers, your enemies. Even your girlfriend was kept in the dark for months—"

"Can we not talk about this right now?" Josie speaks up from one row ahead of the Hope and Clarke.

Hope sighs, not at all wanting to talk about this either.

But, even though they won't say it, everyone else in the car is just as curious.

"I mean, you led people to believe they could trust you, and the whole time, you were lying about your entire life."

How did Hope manage to fool everyone?

Hope finally caves, not for Clarke, but for Josie and her friends, sensing the curiosity from them in the rows ahead of her, "Deception can't be successful without trust."

"But, you had an explanation for everything."

She remembers what she was told by her family when she was old enough to question why all of the secrecy and lies were necessary, "In order to perfect an illusion, the false reality you create has to seem just as authentic as the one it hides. That's why every lie I had to tell was grounded in some aspect of the truth. That kept me connected to reality, to my real identity. There's no room for mistakes. I have to pay careful attention to every possible detail. Any slight imperfection, any questionable explanation, could ruin everything—put myself and everyone I care about in inexplicable danger."

Every passenger takes in her response, not usually  receiving such vulnerability from her, aside from Josie of course.

But Josie takes in every word, too.

She always assumes she knows everything there is to know about her, so she's constantly surprised by new information about the Tribrid's life and experiences.

Clarke responds, seemingly empathetic, "That must be a hard way to live."

It's true.

That is a very difficult way to live.

But to Hope, it's just life.

It's the way things have to be.

How things have always been.

She responds honestly,
"Good way not to die though."

The car is quiet for a moment, not uncomfortable though.

Everyone is just processing.

It's a heavy weight Hope carries on her shoulders each and every day of her life.

After a few seconds of settling into a peaceful silence for the first time since she sat down beside Clarke, Hope feels a soft, reassuring hand her her leg as Josie reaches her arm in the space between her seat and the car door, extending backward until she makes contact with her girlfriend's leg.

And they stay just like that for the rest of the drive to Fort Valley, Georgia.

Comfortable in the reassuring presence they provide to each other.