Unforeseen

Chapter XII

Pulling the letter from the envelope, I turned my face quickly to gather some clean air into my lungs. I noticed its contents reeked of a familiar scent, consisting of long whiskey nights and countlesscigar lights. Although the envelope itself had not the slightest hint of it, the letter told a whole different story and might as well have been submerged in it. The smell was almost strong enough to take me back to my past life, to what I once stood by and lived with. Shaking off the memories, I found myself inspecting the quality of the paper before revealing its contents. It was heavier than normal, and the color wasn't quite ashade of white, it was almost an off-white color.

As I ran my hand across, I found it to be rather rough to the touch, though the edges were not so sharp that you could easily suffer from a paper cut. I also came to the conclusion that the writer either had a heavy hand or there was some sort of emotion behind the print, almost tension. I could feel the words as if they had been sketched to push through the paper. No matter the force, it was able to withstand the brutal whipping of the utensil and thehand that held it, which meant it was an expensive paper; it may even hold the possibility to not have been manufactured here.

Recalling the memory of the man, his well-groomed appearance accompanied by his long dark coat and hat, both appeared expensive and pristine. He stood perfectly rigid like the fold of the newspaper tucked under his arm. Judging by all that, this paper being expensive and uncommon may not be as far from reality as I once thought.Filling my lungs with a reasonable amount of air, I slowly began to unfold the letter.

Undoubtedly, I must tell you of my remorse.Why or how could I ever treat a woman who was nothing but attentive and kind in such a manner? Replaying the scenario now in my head, it's monstrous to watch. The person I really am deep down was unrecognizable at the time. What went wrong? Nothing. You did nothing wrong, said nothing wrong, it was me. All me. I am not the sort of man who makes excuses for himself or others, but you and I shared something that I must point out. The common fact that we both had a bad night filledwith restless sleep. Again, is that an excuse? No. Was that the reality of both of our situations? Yes.

If we could go back and start the day over, I would. I would rewind the clock and make it all go 90away so we could start fresh. You may ask me soft questions in which I may respond as a gentleman.

You were right by the way I must confess; I had never been here before; it was my first visit. I walked by the place many times but never stopped in until that day. I must tell you that I didn't get much sleep again, sick over the way I behaved. I could've gotten myself in trouble or worse, you in trouble.

 It didn't take long once I left the restaurant for the embarrassment and shame to drown down on me. I would've liked to have turned myself right around, came back, and apologized right then but I couldn't. Not that I didn't want to, I just couldn't. I did, however, see you from a distance leaving the restaurant, not long after me, as I didn't get very far since I was contemplating what I should do. I saw the look on your face when you exited the building. Head hung low, shoulders deeply hunched, and at one point it seemed as if the very light had been stripped of you entirely. By your body language, I was sure I just cost you your job. I had to come back today and make the facts known, that it was my fault and not to punish you if they had.

But when I anxiously came in today and saw you behind the counter in good spirits a sense of relief fell over me that I hadn't turned your world 91upside down. At least, I could feel that part of my regret fading away as what I had feared most had not come true.

Well, it appears I've rambled on quite a bit and never really said the words I am sure you would like to hear, so...I'm sorry. Please forgive me for my actions. I will not be in tomorrow as I'm sure you'd appreciate a day not to see me in case you are still upset. But I would like the opportunity to come again one day soon, and with any luck maybe we can start over. 

Sincerely, 

Gabriele Giuliano

Calmly folding up the letter I could almost hear the words still speaking to me, reiterating the important parts that made an impact. Where do we go from here, I wonder while running my hand through the hair on the top of my head. I know he felt bad about the whole thing, so did I, but this man sounded like he was tormented through the night by what he had done. Had he really never shown ill will to anyone before or had he done it so often that he knew exactly the right things to say to be forgiven?

I chose to lay it down in front of me near the roses, my eyes darting back and forth to each end of the folded letter as I try to understand something that I may never. Attempting to clear my head bypushing the thoughts aside I soon realized that for too long I had worn a twisted expression on my face. My forehead was slightly thumping, recognizing it was most likely from the fact that I had crumpled it up with wrinkles throughout the situation of this unexpected letter.

Above all else I couldn't shake the lingering question clinging to my mind, why was he so tormented by what he had done, or was there something else lying deeper inside him that was the actual problem, maybe one day I would come to find out.