back to you//[a.k.]

★ 𝐭𝐞𝐧 ★

new year's eve

ever since the night i got dumped i just grew...silent.

the entire first week, i didn't leave my house. i rarely picked up calls or answered texts. however, i did shoot a small "merry christmas" to everyone on christmas but that was about it. i didn't go anywhere. hell, i rarely left my bed. i felt like shit and i had no motivation to do anything whatsoever.

awsten attempted to call every day. i usually just let it ring. i needed time to think. i got myself into a huge emotional mess and i didn't know how to navigate it.

by new year's eve, i was feeling significantly better. i was able to pull myself out of bed and make phone calls to people i had been ignoring. i spent the entire week previous just mourning my relationship with josh, but by then the pain was dulled. the only pain i still felt was the guilt for how things ended. but, who knew if that'd ever go away anyways?

when i opened my messages i saw at least a million of them from awsten. i mostly ignored them when i shot him a merry christmas message but there were a ton more following that one. i knew that just texting him "hey" wasn't enough and that i should probably just call him.

"y/n!" awsten answered after only two rings. i let out a small laugh at his excitement.

"hey, long time no talk." i said. "how are you?"

"i'm good, now that i know you're at least alive. i was getting kinda worried when the only thing i heard from you for the past ten days was just 'merry christmas'. but, how are you though?"

"i'm better, now. i'm sorry that i was ignoring you. i was ignoring everyone, honestly. i just needed time to think and stuff."

"that's completely understandable, i'm glad you're feeling better now. hey, if you feel like going out, jawn and daphne are throwing a new year's eve party and if you want you can be my plus one."

i thought for a moment. realistically, it would be beneficial to get out of the house. i hadn't gone out since the night of my birthday party. i was also feeling a lot better, so going to the party wouldn't hurt.

"yeah, that doesn't sound too bad." i decided. i could practically hear awsten's smile through the phone.

"alright, can i pick you up at 7:30 then?" he asked me.

"sounds good to me! see you then, aws." i confirmed.

"see you then, jellybean."

awsten hung up and i got up. i really, really needed a shower. i also wanted to finish up his christmas present so that i could give it to him. so basically, i had a lot to do.

i started with the shower. i went into my closet and grabbed a cute but simple black dress and fishnets to go underneath. i then grabbed my speaker and walked into my bathroom to shower.

i showered quickly, as it was already about 3 pm and awsten would be there in only a few hours. when i finished my shower, i got dressed and blow dried my hair. i then curled it, so that it at least looked decent.

i then did a simple makeup look which only took me about fifteen minutes. when i was ready, i got my doc martens on and went over to the desk by my bed.

i got the things for awsten's christmas present and i began finishing it up. it was handmade but i knew he'd like it anyways. it was something that came from my heart and meant a lot to me, as cheesy as that sounded.

by the time the present was ready and i was ready, it was already seven. i went out to my living room and waited for awsten, patiently. i was kind of excited to get out and see my friends. i honestly missed them a lot.