Eyes | Amphibia

Chapter 5

TW: This chapter contains brief mentions of suicide/suicidal thoughts. Proceed at your own risk.

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At the dinner table, Marcy was completely silent. She had her head rested against one hand, while with the other she dragged her fork back and forth through her food with no apparent desire to eat it. Her leg was bouncing uncontrollably under the table, and holding back her tears was becoming increasingly difficult. Mr. and Mrs. Wu noticed this, and shot worried glances at each other from across the table before Mrs Wu. questioned, "Marcy, dear, are you okay? You've barely touched your food."
"Huh?" Marcy flinched, quickly looking up at her parents with eyes that were transfixed with fear. "O-Oh, um... yeah, I'm fine. Just not very hungry right now." She muttered, shrinking in on herself a little. She appeared to be extremely tense, which didn't support her claim that she was fine at all.
"I have a hard time believing that, Marcy. You've been acting strange all day, especially since we got to the house. What's wrong, honey? Please, we just want to hel-"
"I said I'm fine, okay?!" She suddenly shouted, slamming her hand down against the table.
"Hey! Don't you speak to your mother like that, Marcy!" Mr. Wu scolded, following Mrs. Wu's offended gasp.
Realizing what she had done, Marcy frowned, ashamed of herself. "Sorry, sorry... I didn't mean that." She placed her fork down and hugged herself instead, glancing at her mother with apologetic eyes. "I'm just super tired and missing my friends is all." She explained, which was technically the truth, but not the entire truth. Not in the slightest. "I don't know what to do with myself when I'm without them, b-but I don't know when I'm going to see them again." She then looked down at nothing in particular—just anywhere so that she didn't have to see her parents' worried eyes on her—and added softly underneath her breath so that nobody else would be able to hear, "Or even if I can ever see them again."
"Oh, honey..." Mrs. Wu frowned, reaching over to place a comforting hand on Marcy's arm. The touch caused Marcy to tense up though, doing the opposite of what she intended it to, so she removed it. "I know it's hard, but everything's going to be okay. I know how much your friends mean to you, and I promise that you'll see them again, but this is just how things are going to be now. Just know you can talk to us though, okay, Marcy? We're willing to do whatever we can to help you now that we've seen the consequences of not doing so before. So please, if you ever need anything, come to us." She practically begged, clearly scared of what Marcy would do if her needs were neglected again after she went as far as to travel to another dimension to stay with her friends when they told her they'd be moving to accommodate her father's new job.
Forcing a smile, Marcy looked at her mother and answered in a small voice, "Thanks, Mom. I'll keep that in mind."
Smiling back at her daughter, Mrs. Wu nodded in response before she went back to eating her food. It was a simple meal they were eating for dinner tonight, ramen noodles, since they weren't fully settled into the house yet and needed something quick and simple to eat. Marcy was usually a very talkative and energetic person, but they found themself unable to engage in any conversation at the dinner table that night. She forced herself to take a few bites of her food before ultimately realizing that she physically couldn't stomach it despite how good it tasted, and that was when she got up and excused herself from the table. She then dragged herself back into her room and sat down on her bed, letting go of a sigh as she hugged her legs to her chest.
All she wanted to do right now was disappear. How could she possibly go on with her life like normal after finding out that The Core was still alive inside of her and still had the same destructive desires as before? It had told her that if she refused to help it'd take over and take care of things itself, but what else could she do? How could she live with herself like this, knowing that for as long as she was alive, The Core would be too? With The Core still apart of her, her existence was literally a liability to those around her. If she were to kick the bucket, she could get rid of The Core all together and this whole thing could finally be over. Marcy didn't want to die, but if the termination of her life was the only way out of this nightmare, was it the right thing to do?....