Screwed Up Mess

Seven

A/N: VERY IMPORTANT! LILLY WILL DO SOMETHING IN THIS CHAPTER I DONT RECOMMEND FOR ANY OF MY READERS AND PLEASE DONT TRY IT. I DO NOT WANT ANY OF MY BEAUTIFUL READERS DOING ANYTHING DANGEROUS. THANK YOU.

Lilly's POV

I stumbled out if the car in shock. I saw through blurry eyes Josh pull out of the drive out of the driveway and down the road quickly. I went back and climbed up the tree. The tears uncontrollably rolling down my cheeks. I lied down in my bed and sobbed hard. I lost the best thing in my life. How could I be so stupid?

The pain was unbearable. I did the only thing I could think of. I grabbed the scissors I had on my desk and cut my skin three times. I have never done this before, but knew Stephanie's sister had done it to relieve pain. I promised Stephanie I would never do it, but I had to.

After realizing how bad my actions really were, I quickly grabbed a tissue and sobbed again. I cleaned up all the blood and laid back down. I cried more; eventually drifting off to sleep.

"Lillianne Rose, I love you," Josh said as he squeezed me tighter.

We were sitting under our favorite tree that was on top of a hill. It had a great view of the city. The sun was shining and we had just finished eating a delicious meal.

I was sitting on his lap looking down at the city. The sun was setting; giving the sky a beautiful pink and orange color. I said in almost a whisper, "I love you too Josh Andrew."

He patted my thigh; gesturing me to get up which I obliged. I turned around to find him standing in front of me. I saw an evil smirk plastered on his face as he said, "That was until you fucking cheated on me you bitch."

He pulled out a random gun and screamed, "And now you fucking pay!"

Just as he was about to pull the trigger, I woke up screaming. My heart was pounding and I was shaking. That was the worst dream I ever had. I looked at my clock and saw it was 1 AM. I groaned and laid back down.

I decided to ignore the dream and fall back asleep. Sadly this same dream kept occurring; waking me up at 2:30, 3:50, 5:10, 8:30, and lastly at 10:20.

I had the biggest headache due to my lack of sleep. That dream has me really scared, but it was just a dream. I got out of bed and looked out the window. It was raining like usual. I cracked open the window to feel it was warm. I went to my closet and decided on my loose fitting, thick strapped, cream tank top with my leather jacket. I went over to my dresser and pulled out black leggings and fresh undergarments.

I headed over to my bathroom and took a refreshing shower. I stepped out and dried off. I slipped on my undergarments, leggings and tank top. I brushed my teeth and put on my fruit deodorant. I brushed and blow dried my hair. I put on my jacket and walked back over to my room.

I sat in front of my mirror and put on a little black eyeliner on the bottom lids, mascara, grey smokey eye eyeshadow, and pink lip gloss. I swept my hair to the right side and fishtailed it. I put on low cut, black socks and headed downstairs.

I found my mom in the kitchen making waffles. I grabbed a grape out of the basket on my counter where we keep fresh fruit and plopped it into my mouth. Mom said, "Good morning sweetie."

I swallowed and said, "Morning."

We sat in silence for a little bit until she spoke, "So why did I hear your window open last night?"

I had a close relationship with my mom and told her almost everything and I figured now was a good time to tell her everything so I did.

She was pretty relaxed about it all. She knew I drank once in a while and agreed as long as I was responsible about it and it was a once in a while thing, she was fine. She said calmly, "So you didn't mean to hurt Josh?"