Screwed Up Mess

Sixteen

Josh POV

I pulled into my driveway and was heading inside when I looked across the street. I knew that car very well. Lil's. This was my opportunity to talk to her and I wasn't going to waste it. I rushed to Zayn's house and sure enough, there she is. In his kitchen with tears down her face. Before I could speak she spoke, "Leave."

I wasn't backing out. "No Lil. We need to talk."

She shook her head, "Not again. Not now. I'm done Josh. There's no changing-"

"But Lilly! Just listen dammit. I came to apologize for last night. I know we won't get back together and I'm accepting that, but please just know I'm so sorry for what I said. I screwed up and was drunk."

"And what about Niall? You guys hurt him!"

Her shouting made me start to shout, "I didn't touch him! Harry did. And that prick deserved it."

I knew once the words left my mouth they were wrong. Zayn stepped in calmly, "Josh, just go. This isn't the time."

I turned to Zayn, "No Zayn! I'm trying to work things out!"

Lilly stood up and spoke softly, "But I don't want to. I can't take the temper, the fighting, all of it," she walked over to me and hugged me. She continued once she pulled away, "Josh I hurt you. I know I was wrong, and we had a bad break up. But we need to accept that. I don't feel the same way about you anymore. I've learned that not every guy treats me like you did, both negatively and positively. Don't think for one second I didn't and don't love you becasue I sure as hell do, but right now it isn't the time. We are so fucked up that'd take a lot of time to even try to fix this."

"So lets work on it! Please Lil. I know we have problems, but I love you!"

"It just won't work out. I'm not the same. I've learned so much without you. Josh I hate to break it to you, but you're just a dick. Do yourself a favor and just leave. I am done with your shit."

That's when I knew it was over. I had no shot. I turned and walked out without saying anything. I was becoming angry and I know exactly who ruined my relationship.

Zayn's POV

Josh walked out without a word. He left Lilly sitting in the kitchen crying. I walked over to her and hugged her. She pushed me off her and said, "I need to see Niall."

I stood up and responded, "Alright then lets go."

"No Zayn. I need to. Alone."

"Why?"

She stood up and went to get her shoes. I followed as she responded, "It doesn't matter to you."

"Fine then. Go."

She stormed out of my house and didn't look back once.

Niall's POV

I was lying in bed on my laptop when I heard three loud bangs on my front door. I ran to the door and opened it. I found an angry Lilly standing behind it. She stormed in saying, "I can't take this anymore. No, I can't take him and his fucking mind games Niall. One minute he wants me and the next he treats me like shit! I can't live like this! I just can't."

She was now sitting on my couch sobbing. I walked over to her and hugged her. She wrapped her arms around me and stayed like that. She cried silently into my shoulder for what felt like hours. When we pulled apart she did the unexpected, she kissed me.

I pulled away confused. "Why?"

She stared at me, "Thank you. But I need to go home."

"Please don't." I quickly thought of an excuse, "I'm not feeling too well and could really use a friend to help me out."

She sighed and I knew I convinced her. She spoke, "Alright lets go inside."

I smiled as we walked into my house. She takes off her shoes and heads straight for my bedroom like usual. She asked, "What do you want me to help you with?"

"Uh you can..."

She spoke abruptly, " What's the real reason you wanted me to stay?"

I let out a deep breath, "Ok, I just was all shook up from what happened with Josh and Harry and needed someone to be with me."

She hugged me and comforted me. As we pulled away we looked at each. I started to lean in to kiss her when she pulled away. I quickly said, "I thought since we did earlier..."

"I'm sorry."

She started to walk out, but stopped when I spoke, "Lil wait! It's my fault."

She turned, "No it's mine. I have something I wanna... I mean have to do."

I saw a look in face that told me she was hiding something. "Just tell me."

Lil's POV

I knew I had to tell him sooner or later so I just blurted, "I know I kissed you before, but you need to know that I... I uh... I kinda think I'm falling for Zayn." 

He stared at me for a while then spoke, "Maybe you should just go."

I spoke trying to smooth things over, "No please. I'm sorry, but you needed to know. I don't want or mean to hurt you, but it's the truth. I don't want this to ruin anything between us, but if you can't understand, it's ok. You know how much you mean to me, but I can't look at you the way you look at me.The kiss earlier, was extremely spontaneous and I don't know," I kissed him on the cheek, "I'm so sorry."

I started to walk out when he said, "No, you aren't walking away. You can't get the last word this time. You need to know that if you are choosing Zayn, that I can't and won't stand to the side this time. I took the risk and told you how I felt. Now you make the decision. Be with me, or walk away. But you're walking away from this friendship."

I looked at him and thought about it. I walked away with tears down my face. Leaving Niall is the hardest decision I will ever have to make. 

A/N: Jeez has it been forever! I'm really trying to catch up on writing again. I want to finish up this fanfic and hopefully do lots more writing. Tell me what you think!! XOXO