Something, Nowhere (The Boyz Q Fanfiction/ Reader-Insert) [COMPLETED]

Ch. 17: A Life To Live

• Y/N •

Where is he?

It's been almost a full day now, and yet, I haven't seen a single sign of Changmin coming back to this room.

What if he left? No, that's not possible. He promised me he'd stay. He promised, so there's no way he would just suddenly leave. But if he really did just leave without telling me...

I'm gonna kill him.

He wouldn't just leave, right? I'm sure he won't. He should know not to just leave so suddenly.

I look around the vast, white room, the evening shadows playing around it while the silence stretched on.

It's quiet... Too quiet.

My nails have already become so chipped from my constant biting, and my eyes have been wandering around too much.

Just where the hell did that brat go?!

I swear, he better not have broken his promise after he said he'd keep it. Unless, of course...

He only happened to be just like everyone else.

Changmin... that jerk...

"WHERE IS HE?!!"

Suddenly, the nurse that attends to me barges into the room, and on her face, I see a frantic look as she looks towards me.

Ah, of course... that fake concern.

"Y/N? what's wrong?" The woman approaches me, but I speak before she even gets to reach me.

"Where's Changmin? Where is he?!" I ask demandingly.

She suddenly stops in her tracks, and he face turns stoic. And at her weird behavior, I only furrow my brows.

What's that supposed to mean?

"He didn't... did he?" My sentence was undoubtedly incomplete, but I know for sure that the nurse understood. After all, her expression only turned into that of sympathy as she continued approaching me.

"Y/N..."

"No... He didn't... He promised me..."

"Y/N, listen to me."

"He promised me! Are you telling me he left after telling me all that?!"

I shriek when the nurse grabs me by my shoulders, and as I turn to her, my livid eyes meet hers.

"Yes, Y/N! He left! Your roommate Changmin left!"

"But why?!" I shout back. But my voice shook this time, and suddenly, I felt a despair in my chest. It was familiar. But just like usual, I couldn't really pinpoint where it came from. "Why would he suddenly leave?! TELL ME WHY?!"

"Because he deserves it!"

He... "deserves it"...?

What kind of nonsense is that?

"W-what are you–"

"Look, I know, it's hard, but try to think in his shoes, too, okay? He wanted to leave. Changmin wanted to leave. In fact, anyone who gets admitted in a hospital would want to leave–"

"No. No, I don't believe you. Get him back here! Get him back here, now!" I fight against the woman's hold, but for some reason, fighting against her was suddenly difficult. "Get him back here!"

"Y/N, please... He has a life to live–"

"And I don't?!" With my eyes wide and livid, I look back at the nurse. My eyes meet hers, and my hands grab her arms as my emotion only become stronger. "I've lived here almost all my life, and you tell me... that someone else has a life to live and I don't? Is that it?!"

She only looks back at me with apologetic eyes. Eyes which I can barely even believe anymore. But then again, have I ever believed in them? All this woman did was lie to me.

She lied about my mother's health. She lied about my mental state. She lied about my disciplining and what the other patients thought of me, and now...

I shove the woman away, finally succeeding in getting out of her hold this time. And I glare at her, while her gaze remained the same.

Sympathetic. Sorry. Fake.

"I... hate you," I breathe out, the lone emotion in my chest slowly dying down now, only to be replaced by nothing again. "I hate you," I repeat, as the emotion disappears and I am left yet another empty shell.

"I hate you," I speak one last time, and it was then, that I finally realize just where that familiar emotion came from.

It was some time ago, when I shared a room with someone else, only for that person to disappear shortly after, too.

She lied about that, too, this nurse. And for that, I only hated her even more.