What do I live for?

Chapter 3

Jace Pov

Mike went out to work and its again the same thing. He talked about going to meet so his colleagues and he'll be home late. 'From tomorrow you can go outside  but you know what will happen if you disobey me.'his words that night. When I think about what happened a week ago I still cant believe it. Thinking back to the next morning after he permitted me to go outside. Mike was up before me. His words felt like a dream. Although my heart was hammering in my chest. I wasn't that devoted.My eyes is pinned on Mike who probably noticed my intense. "Yes Jace, I am serious. You may go out but only to the mall and back or you can take a  quick walk or maybe sit outside." How could he do this to me after so long. What a selfish person he is. "Why now?"the words was out before I could even think about it. "I'm going to be very busy for this few months. You might get bored. I'm going to hire a bodyguard for you."he says with a smirk. I hate Mike but I also don't  because I'm used to his treatment towards me. He was homophobic but he still took me in. Its ironic how a homophobe can also be very much gay. He was at the camp for like two months. When they found out I was gay, I was their only prey. Every morning I got ripped from the comfort of my bed to do hard labor while being hurt. I cant exactly say it was a comfortable bed cause it was run down. No mattress, only a thick blanket in the place of a mattress. With a thin blanket to cover my skinny sensitive skin. There were times when they would electroshock me with a  self made machine. Dominique  who is Mike's cousin believed he had the cure to everything. "There's no place for fags around here. I will be your cure,"he said disgustedly. At times I just wished they can just kill me. Its better to go into a deep sleep and never wake up than being tortured with such horror. My pale skin was burned with hot metal. Small but it had hurt like a bitch. While being injected with different substances. I was tortured to the point where I  couldn't feel anymore. Mike just laughed when I cried and screamed in pain. He has no feelings. Just like I am today. A heartless person with Traumatophobia. A decease where a person is exposed to blood, an injury, or injections. They begin the experience extreme sensations of terror. Such as breathlessness, excessive sweating, dry mouth and shaking. Everything started when my parents and villagers were slaughtered by the most evil men alive.

For the passed week I just went outside and walked around the yard. The smell of the outside assaulted my nostrils. Reminding me that I was a stranger to this world. The sun burned my skin and it felt weird. I used to live near the woods with my family. The smell of green always enlightened me and I loved it but now I'm surrounded by big different buildings. The streets are quiet. My kind of peace. The darkness of my room swallowed me in that I forgot all about the outside life. Today was the day to see things of course with the bodyguard that was assigned to me. His name is Cody Jones. A very well build American with dark  brown eyes, brown tea colored hair and a deep gaze. He looks like the type of guy who doesn't take shit from anybody especially me. Mike probably told him all about me. I don't have any interest in getting to know him. However, my  plans was to go to the mall and take a slow walk back. I can't believe I actually have plans. Actually I'm kind of grateful for Cody. That way no one can approach me. His car was parked outside. As we walked to his car with him in the lead. "Can we...maybe walk to the mall. Mike said it's not very far from here,"I asked. He gazed at me annoyed but approved. My first time talking to someone else other that Mike and myself. We take a left on the second street. Where we walk passed a black van. Where two largely build men stood. They were much larger than Cody. Their eyes were pinned on me. Especially the one with the midnight black hair. Of course I know why they're staring. I'm a stranger to them. They've probably been living here longer than me so they know everyone. Cody walks tall behind me but as I looked at him I saw fear in his eyes. Was he actually scared of those guys or..? I don't like the ways those guys was staring at me so I walked faster. I'm sure they wouldn't harm someone they don't know. What am I even thinking, of course they would. In this world you can't trust anyone. Like I don't trust anyone. We got to the mall after 40 minutes of walking. It was packet with a lot of different people. Everything looked strange. And I was amazed by it. My heart started to race. I don't want to be touched by anyone here. The money Mike gave me was enough to last 5 more months. why he gave a such an amount I don't know. And I don't need a lot of things, he has everything at his house. Deciding to just go to the clothes store. I wanted to get out of here as soon as possible. Grabbing three hoodies and four jeans. I paid and got the hell out of there. When I got outside all I saw was blood. Loads and loads of blood. Two men being slaughtered to dead with a knife by one lone man wearing a mask. My breathing became horse  as I froze right there in front of them. I couldn't believe my eyes. Again? I never thought I'd see such a thing again in my life. Before I knew it my feet was moving very quickly. All the speed that I had came out. I just wanted to get away as tears streamed down my face. How could this happen to me just when I thought I had a bit of freedom. It felt like I was having a concussion. Nothing around me mannered. "Hey get back here!Stop!"Cody screamed behind me. My mind was running wild. All I could do was run away.