The Boy With The Blue Eyes [Louis Tomlinson Story AU]

Chapter 16

   Maliya's PoV

        I was starting to get really concerned for Alice. I mean, her mood swings were haywire in itself, but her violence was even worse. This wasn't the Alice I knew, and I wasn't sure what it was that was going wrong with her, I mean, I know she's been under a lot of stress lately but cutting herself, getting violent? That is not her personality at all.

       I saw the scared look on Alice's face and I realized something scary; Alice had no idea what was going on either. If she wasn't acting like this by choice, the first thing that popped into my head was that she was bi-polar. Not even in the joking way you call your friends bi-polar when you're messing around, but in the serious medical illness of the mind way.

      Louis walked into the living room tentatively, he obviously was just as thrown by Alice's actions just now as we were. This all seemed so bizarre. What the heck was going on? I didn't even understand anything that was going on. So I did all I could do right now, which was plop down in the arm chair next to Alice and rub my fingers harshly against my temples.

       Alice began to cry quietly and I had no idea what to do. I just sat there, I felt like a bad friend for not trying to comfort her, but I couldn't help it. I didn't know what to do even if I did try to comfort her. I didn't know which mood she would be in.

       Clearly Louis didn't find the same barrier between him and the girl on the couch because he walked up to her, and crouched in front of her.

      "Alice, what's going on? Can you tell us? Because we don't know how to help you if we don't know what's wrong." She just shook her head at him, and placed her hands over her eyes, hiding her face. I saw the bright red cuts along her wrist and felt another flare of anger in my chest.

     "Don't you get it Louis? She clearly doesn't know why she's upset. She doesn't know what's wrong. She doesn't know why she slashed her wrists, she doesn't know what she's doing. She doesn't know anything." I heard how harsh my voice came out, but I couldn't help it. How do you not understand why you dragged a razor across the skin on your wrist, obviously meaning to cause self-harm, and then get all mad at someone for trying to help. I just don't understand how on earth you couldn't know.

      "Maliya, just calm down. None of us know what's going on so we're going to find someone to help Alice okay?" He seemed so cool with the situation, how could he? Louis wasn't even here for the last few years of her life. Why does he suddenly care so much anyways? If he cared he wouldn't have left Alice. He wouldn't have left her in pieces that I had to sweep up, and glue back together. And now, I felt a sudden hatred towards him. Who was he to want to help my best friend, when I'm almost positive that it's his fault.

       "Why do you care so much Louis?" My voice sounded so cool, but on the inside I was frustrated. I was angry because my friend was going insane and I didn't understand why, and because when I don't understand something, I can't stand it. I didn't understand his sudden devotion to Alice.

      "I care, because I realized that I left Alice in a bad position when I did. But I want to fix our friendship now."

       Alice PoV

     I watched all of this with a dazed mind. Why were they arguing? Why couldn't I hear what they were saying? I heard something, but the voices didn't belong to Maliya and Louis. The voices weren't someone I knew, or something. The voices were high-pitched, almost like a metallic ringing noise. I couldn't understand what they were saying but it was slowly becoming more clear.

      As soon as I realized what they were saying, I clamped my hands over my ears.

      "Stupid child." My father. "I don't love you, Alice, why would I love you?" Louis.

      "You are worthless, you don't belong here. You don't belong to anyone. No one wants you, look at you? Why would anyone want something so pathetic and worthless as you?" I knew this voice, I knew it like the back of my hand. But it didn't sound right, because it wasn't coming from my mouth. It was my voice.

       With that I let out a bloodcurdling scream. I fell to the floor, and screamed, and screamed. My fingernails dug into the sensitve skin behind my ears, and I could feel the warm blood slowly trickling from the cuts. I clawed at my ears, willing them to block out the voices.

       But they weren't in my ears. They were swarming around in my head, and I couldn't block them out. I felt arms trying to pull my hands away from my ears, but I couldn't hear anything but the voices, and my own screams.

~~~~

     When I woke up, I was in my own bed, and the clock red 3:12am. I could remember very little from earlier, but when I closed my eyes I saw flashes of moments in my head.

     I saw my little sisters standing there, trying desperatley to pull out of Maliya's grip as they screamed to me. I saw specks of blood all over the floor, and Louis' large tan arms wrapped around my wrist. I saw him dragging me passed the girls to the staircase. But what I saw next scared me, and I wished I hadn't seen it.

      I reached my hand out, and it was smeared in my own blood. Then I took a wild swipe at my youngest sister. My blood streaked on her face, and I saw her own leaking from a cut I made on her cheek. I heard her high-pitched shriek as she clutched her cheek, leaning into Mi. My oldest sister still called out my name, and reached for me, but I was too far away to reach her as well.

       Then Louis had me pinned down as I lay on the bed. He locked my wrists down with his hands, and tried to plead with me to calm down as I thrashed wildly. I cursed at him, spit, tried to hit and kick him. The look on his face broke my heart. He looked so hurt, emotionally, physically, any way I could hurt him I did, just by unconciously rejecting him like I was right now.

       Finally I calmed down and passed out, the pressure on my wrists let go, and I didn't even try to get up, Louis left, and I slept.

       Now that I was awake and aware of what I had done, I stood, and stumbled towards the door awkwardly in my cast, flinging it open. I glanced out of the corner of my eye and stopped dead in my tracks. Across the door were smears of my blood, looking as if I were dragged past the door against my will, no doubt when Louis brought me up.

        And I broke. I sprinted for the front door as best I could, and down the porch. Only then did I notice the snow covering the ground. In Doncaster, snow wasn't a big deal, but I felt like it was a disaster. The snow flipped a switch in me, and I freaked.

        Flinging myself into the snow, and pulling at my own hair, the voices returning. But this time, something else happend.

       I saw Louis, pale, but glowing right in front of my face. He backed away from me, a look of disgust on his face. He reached forward and pulled another glowing figure with him backwards. It was Liam, in his arms was my younger sister, the left side of her face horribly disfigured by my fingernails.

      The others appeared, their glowing figures backing away as well, disgusted by me writhing on the ground in the numbing snow. My sister, Maliya, Athena, Niall, Louis, Liam, Zayn, My mother, my father, all of them left me, disgusted. They couldn't stand to be near me, and this caused me to return to squirming on the ground, pulling at my hair, and screaming.

      I saw Louis, a much more solid version of him, lift me. Half-carrying, half-dragging me up the stairs to my room once again. Once he set me on my bed, I fell asleep instantly.

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