If Ever | Damiano David Story

Chapter 12 | Doing it again

22 May 2021

France's song just finished and Vana informed us that is one of the countries that are likely to win. It was a nice song and the woman singing had a good voice, but it's definitely not my favorite. Τhere are many, actually, that I like more.

"So, how much time are you staying in Italy exactly?" Vana grabs a handful of chips.

I look at her confused at the question. "The program is for one year."

"I'd love a trip to Italy."

I chuckled at her comment and the fact that she just invited herself to Italy "I'd be happy to host you in my house. I could use some friendly faces there, especially, at the beginning."

Marsia looks at me and I know exactly what she was about to say. "You have friendly faces in Italy. Very friendly faces."

"Marsia, please." I can't have her start with this again. I've had some glasses of wine and I really can't with that right now.

"Just get your head of your ass and send him a fucking text." Her voice is raised and I can't take the same conversation repeatedly. I'm tired of listening to her telling me that I'm acting weird and stupid. I just can't take it anymore. The next words come out of me without thinking.

" I did months ago and what did I managed to do? Nothing." I exhale and lay back on the sofa.

Marsia looks at me surprised. I can't blame her. I hadn't told her about it because I was trying to convince myself that it was nothing important, it was not worthy talking about. So, I texted him some months ago. I had just learnt that I'd have to move to Rome, and I immediately thought about him. I guess that whole if you are ever in Rome really got into my head. It was around the end of February. I regrated it as soon as I sent him that text. By that time, we hadn't talk for like a month. We talked for a while. He told me they were super busy at that time because they were taking part at a festival or something. I never told him that I was moving. All that situation felt like I was forcing something that was not supposed to happen. After some days he texted me back, but I felt like it was too hard for me, so the conversation didn't last long. We haven't communicated at all since.

I was trying to not think about it, actually, I am constantly trying to not think about him. I am ready to break, and I can't take it anymore. I place my face inside my knees trying to hide my embarrassment and frustration.

"You texted him? When did that happened? Why didn't you tell me anything?" Marsia kept shooting me with questions.

Vana seemed even more confused. "What are you two talking about?"

I slowly look up at Vana. "There was a guy or maybe there is a guy. Well, there's not a guy but maybe there could be a guy?"

"Leda!" Marsia interrupts me "You're not making any sense."

"I know." I say frustrated and hide my face between my legs again.

29 August 2020

I was working at the bar with Stefanos that night. I was still trying to get used to my routine again, but my mind was elsewhere. Probably on a beach, preferable with Damiano. I couldn't get him out of my mind the last two days, but I guessed it would fade away soon. It was still the vacations speaking inside my head. I was making two margaritas for two women sitting on the bar in front of me. I saw my phone vibrating on the bar, and I looked at it. It was a text from Marsia. I would get to that later. The bar was pretty stuffed that night and I was still more of a barrier than actual help to Stefanos. I was getting better by each day, but I was completely useless when it came to cocktails. I knew only the basics, so Stefanos had to make all the cocktails by himself.