Sinful Desires

Beating heart

Alex was sick and tired of the frustration building within her. In class today, the only thing that kept her sane was the doe-eyed little monsters that she was teaching, she loves them so much.

Seeing these little monsters had been one of the things she looked forward to every day. Of course, Enzo marks the height of it. Having her little family kept her together even when all she wanted to do was to cry herself to sleep every night for her loss.

Whenever she was alone, her loss was magnified. She never stopped thinking about him, he was everything to her. He was her soul, but he was lost to her forever. What did she ever do wrong to not deserve to be together with Damon? Why was the universe meddling and messing up their lives? Was it so wrong to enjoy loving someone and being loved in return? These and many more were the kinds of questions that bugged Alex in the tub while she cried herself to oblivion, surrounded by the rushing water in the bathroom.

Sometimes, Josh joined her in the tub and held her in his arms to watch her cry. Sometimes, he just stayed with her, and sometimes he broke things in frustration. Josh wasn't entirely helpless, in fact, Josh was reckless and selfish, but he wasn't all these with her. He was the complete opposite when it came to Alex and her son. She was glad to have him in her life.

Though she had often wondered if she was using him. She had also spoken to him about this, but Josh had told her that he was a grown man and would do whatever the hell he wanted. She believed him. Josh did whatever he wanted on his own terms.

However, the frustration was back. Alex left the school during break and was in the library picking up some books to curl up to, at night. This was one of the hobbies she picked up after she left Damon.

As she was going through the aisle in the library, one of the books caught her eye. She stopped to inspect it and removed it from the row it belonged.

She jumped, frightened when a pair of eyes occupied the other end of the row that was once covered by the book.

She recognized those eyes; she would recognize them anywhere. They belonged to only one person. She had been longing to catch a glimpse of the owner for two years now.

And now, he was here.

"Holy mother-" She was about to curse when he put his finger across his lips, signaling her to keep quiet. She obeyed.

She walked to the other aisle to join him, while looking around.

"Is he here?" She asked, but he shook his head.

She felt deflated. When she saw Matt, a part of her lifted because wherever Matt was, so was Damon. Now she was disappointed. Regardless, this was still something. She would take whatever she got. It was hope.

"Come, I know a quiet place." She led him to a secluded corner of the library devoid of any prying eyes and where she hoped they could whisper in peace and not disturb other people.

They sat down. An awkward silence ensued between them, but maybe mostly on her part. Matt was weirdly looking at her face, her eyes mostly.

"Um- why are you looking at me that way?"

"This is the first time I am actually looking at you, from up close."

"What?" She was thrown by his statement.

"Yes, because all the time I had ever spent with you was to protect you, looking everywhere but you. But now, I see why. You're beautiful. You're so beautiful and that's why you have one of the most powerful men on his knees. That's why he was ready to give everything up for you, not until your life was threatened. You are beautiful."