Untameable addiction (Jesse Pinkman)

We All Die In The End

Season 2
TW: Contains depictions of blood, violence, and swearing.

Red, all I could see was red. Red smeared on my shoes, red staining the sand, even Jesse's car was red. All reminding me of the face that was massacred only minutes ago. And for what, dominance? It is a man's world after all... So they say. All of us breathed heavily as I sit in the backseat of the soft red interior, fidgeting with Jesse's keys instead of his hand.

"Adjusting for inflation. Good state college, say 45,000 a year. Two kids, four years of college,360,000. Remaining mortgage on the home 107,000. Home equity line 30,000. That's 137,000. Cost of living, food, clothing, utilities, say two grand a month. I mean, that should put a dent in it anyway. Twenty-four k a year, provide for say ten years. That's 240,000. Plus 360, plus 137. Seven thirty-seven. Seven hundred and thirty-seven thousand. That's what I need. That... Is what I need." Jesse's scared eyes meet mine in the mirror, the two of us looking to each other whilst Mr. White speaks mostly to himself. How much did I truly need? How much would satisfy the needs of my small family until we die? When will it be enough? And when should I stop?

"The drug deals will only be in public places from now on. This... Will not happen again." Mr. White states firmly, looking between us both with intent. But we can only sigh, handing the keys to Jesse so we can finally leave this place. But no sooner had he'd begun driving down the dirt road, did that oh-so-familiar black SUV come blocking our route, my body exploding in nerves. I look out the window, past the two men, watching as Tuco grabs the convulsing body and drops him to the ground.

"Heisenberg! Get your bitch out here!" He yells, meeting my eyes through the glass, my blood curdling into ice at his glare. Jesse stands in front of me, even as we exit the car, watching the man's body shake on the brink of death.

"What's wrong with him?" Tuco demands, I place a hand on Jesse's shoulder whilst I move past, jogging to crouch next to the victim, Mr. White meeting me on the opposite side.

"You can't take an ass beating bitch?" I listen for his heartbeat but am not surprised to find none, placing my fingers onto the side of his neck with the same result, looking cautiously back up at Tuco.

" He doesn't have a pulse," I state to him, trying to keep a straight face and not show him fear.

"Do something! You're a woman! Do that shit where you press on him! Weren't you taught that?" I obey with a glare and begin CPR, pressing firmly down onto his chest in rhythm, but he remains still with no pulse.

"Tuco, there's not--There's nothing." Mr. White confirms as I continue pressing down on this man.

"Breathe into his mouth."

"That doesn't work!" I yell in response to Tuco's command, my arms growing fatigued at the constant motion.

"You! Come here, breathe into his mouth." Tuco addresses towards Jesse, him moving to crouch down beside me as I fall slightly backward in exhaustion, not willing to provide anymore. However I am quick to snatch Jesse's arm before he obeys Tuco's order, Mr. White silently shaking his head whilst we all watch the fluid leak from the poor guy's mouth. He was murdered, clear as day, but he was not killed today... No, he had died the moment he was involved with Tuco, and we shall suffer the same fate if we truly do continue this so-called work.

Jesse in a swift motion pulls me up and off the ground as Tuco begins his merciless beating upon the dead, kick after kick, blow after blow, each one sending us further and further away. Jesse's grip never loosening. My ears were ringing, not able to process what Tuco says to the remaining goon until he begins dragging the body away, towards the piles of cars that surround us. The three of us beginning to cautiously move back towards Jesse's vehicle,  whilst Tuco is occupied.