"Something changed in me that day we met at the bookstore. You changed me. The second I looked into your eyes I was different. There's just something about you. It's so easy, so effortless, so amazingly wonderful and thrilling and familiar. You don't muddle things up, you clear them. You make me want to be better, do better. You make me feel like... like..." he stops, unable to find the words he's looking for.
"Like you're home." I say staring at him with amazement, my heart full of love and tears in my eyes.
'Please take me, take me and remember' I internally wish. He looks at me with understanding and concern. He starts to say something, but I stop him.
"Wait," I say, holding my hand up.
"Before you say anything else, I have to tell you something and you might not believe me or think I'm crazy, but please, just listen before you make that judgement, okay?" I look up at him for his affirmation in understanding my request. He nods, I take a deep breath and release it.
"Okay, well, this is going to sound crazy, but here we go. We're soulmates Axl. We have been since our beginning. The men of our people don't remember this for some reason no one can seem to recall anymore. The women, however, do and we move around in search of our soulmates. I'm not really supposed to tell you this because we can't force you to be with us when we find you. You're still your own person. We have shared twenty-seven lifetimes together and I wasn't with you in the last one and I can't take it anymore. Gods damnit Tobias, I miss you so much." the words spilling out of me, radiating emotion and I just start crying. I realize too late I didn't use his current name. I risk looking at his face. He's just staring, mouth agape, unable to process what I just told him. I decided I've done enough damage and need to excuse myself.
"Axl, I'm so sorry." and I get up to leave, tears still staining my cheeks. I get two steps away when I feel a hand on my wrist. I look down at it and follow the attached arm up into the face of the man I love.
"I'm so sorry." I repeat.
"What did you call me?" he asks sounding upset? Confused? No, something else.
"Tobias. That was your name in our first life together. The name you had when we became soulmates. We have both had many names, but you will always be mine, just as I will always be yours."
"Will I ever remember our lives?" he asked. I was shocked,
"What? Do... do you seriously believe me?"
"Look, I told you, the day in the bookstore changed me. It was seeing you. Yes, I believe you. Please, how can I remember?" him holding both wrists now.
"I can't tell you that." I say painfully.
"Why not?" he demands.
"Because I can't force you to be with me. You have to actively choose to pursue this, it's the only way it'll work. You have to want me back too." I answer, saddening, not fully believing he wants this. He sees my head drop forward and he steps towards me. He lifts my chin, so I have to look at him. He gazes in to my eyes, looks at my lips and kisses me. My body explodes into passion, yearning for him. His arms solid and strong holding me to his chest. My fingers clutching at his neck trying desperately to be closer. Sparks dance across my closed lids and I melt into him. We break away for a breath. Panting, he says,
"If you really are my soulmate, of course I want you back. You're my home." I hug him tightly and cry some more, but these are happy. He wants me back. He wants to remember. Hesitantly I ask,
"You sure you want to remember?"
"Yes, absolutely." kissing me once again.
"Why wouldn't I?"
"I had to be sure. Okay, well, in order for you to remember, we have to fully take each other." I simply reply. I see the confusion cross his face.
"Take each other? Take each other where?"
"No, no. Fully take each other. We have to... make love." I state more clearly. Realization dawns on him and his eyes widen slightly.
"Oh, um, how does that work?" he inquires.
"Well, the act of making love is one of the most intimate and to know your partner intimately on multiple planes allows you to form a much stronger and deeper connection to them. In physicality, in the act, you share bodies and minds, however, you both form a deeper connection to each other during the climax of that love making. Where you are both lost in the moment, and both are fully lost within their partner." I tell him, my heart racing, pounding loudly in my ears. He pulls me into him and embraces me. I wrap my arms around him and inhale his scent.
'He still smells the same.' I smile. Axl places his nose behind my ear and breathes deeply. He kisses my neck and whispers,
"Makenna," shivers run down my spine and my knees turn to Jell-O. I have to grip him harder to keep myself steady.
"Can I fully take you?" he asks gruffly. My breath hitches, my heart skips a few beats, my legs are shaking, my mouth is dry. I look at him, eyes heavy lidded, I bite my lower lip, release, intently gaze into his eyes and say,
"Yes sir, you may take me." Unblinking, I wait for it. If it really is there, those two words like that will show it. Waiting, he shudders.
'Ha! There it is! I knew it.'
YOU ARE READING
Her Fire
Lãng mạnEvery few years, I move to a new town. I typically spend two to three years in a place and if I don't have the dreams, I leave. This has been the way of my people for eons. The women move around, searching. The men, however, have long ago, lost the...
