𝐇𝐞𝐫 𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐀𝐝𝐝𝐢𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧

THIRTY EIGHT

Vivianne

For months, Constance had been ignoring me.

Ignoring my texts, ignoring any casual conversation I tried to make with her. I mean, she'd talk to everyone else normally. My teammates, even Kynlee. I got so jealous that Kynlee even stopped talking to her. I was just so confused. Did she get back with Angelle? Did I...do something wrong?

Then I stopped caring.

I focused on me, and pulling through at my aunt and uncle's house where things were actually okay. I was back in volleyball, my skin had faded away my scars, and my parents were getting that new baby soon, and I actually didn't feel...bitter about it.

I don't know if healing counts if it was forced on you from the beginning, but now that I've accepted it, it seems to be working just fine for me.

Open land, and too much grass. Cows passing by in a blur as we rode on the charter bus. It was time for our final game of the season. The one that would determine if we'd be state champs. Constance rode on the bus with us, sitting at the front and laughing it up with Coach Wang.

My knees were to my chest in my seat, as I listened to some music to hype me up. It was December, and the driver had the heater blasting, but it wasn't doing much for me since I was closest to the window. It was large and cool against my shoulder, but I didn't really mind if I didn't think about it too much.

"Alright! We're almost there girls!" Coach Wang called out.

I couldn't believe we had even made it this far.

Looking at our team from the start of the season, we had potential but not that type of potential. But even though it kind of sucked to admit it, Constance had really shaped us up, and Coach too, of course.

"Hey," Kynlee nudged me, our elbows touching.

"Hey," I said back softly.

I wasn't as close with Aiana and Kyn anymore.

It was just one of those things that slowly happened.

"How you doin'?"

This was probably the most me and Kyn had talked since November.

"Fine. You?"

I was really more close with myself more than anything.

"Real good. I can't believe we're playing the Bears. They're so fuckin' cool," Kynlee laughed. And, I loved my friend, but she had finally left behind her awkward usage of slang and the real Kynlee was more so starting to shine through. She wasn't trying to be something she wasn't anymore. I think our senior year was really changing everybody for the better.

"My parents are comin' to the game," I added. "It's kind of cool."

"Did they get a baby yet?"

"Not yet, but soon," I nodded.

"How do you...feel about that?"

I sat back and thought for a moment, turning my volume all the way down for my music. "I think it's gonna be great for them. And I should be happy for them." That was the best answer that I could give right now.

"You and Constance..."

"Nonexistent," I laughed. "But I'm glad I won't have to think about that problem much longer. Guess who's leavin' the state after she graduates?"

Kynlee's eyes widened. "No, really?"

"Yeah," I shrugged, "I need be free and set my sights on something. I don't know what it is but I wanna jump into life blind and let it bring me back to the shore every time. It's the only way to take on the world," I grinned.