It Was Always You - Sebastian Stan x Reader

2. Its easier to ignore it

I promised you a second chapter in the morning and here it is! Enjoy 😊

TW: self esteem issues and self loathing

Xx

You could hear your phone buzzing from across the room as you tried your best to ignore it. Anthony had already sent you 112 texts and called 9 times since waking up today, and you knew why. Everyone in the cast of marvel - regardless of fucking movie, knew just how badly you had been crushing on Sebastian as of recently. You were completely enamored by your best friend and you could barely handle hearing about his girlfriend so you stayed hidden. Your phone reminding you of just how weak you really are.

After what seemed like forever, the annoying vibrating finally stopped and hour screen faded to black. You thought Anthony had finally gotten the hint but quickly you found out that wasn't the case. "(Y/n)!" His normally cheerful voice sounded from the other side of the door, followed by some light knocking. Against your better judgment you moved from your perch and opened the bedroom door. "You have about 15 minutes to pull yourself together before Sebastian gets back here with Alejandra."

Finally catching the older man's eyes, all of your feelings were clear as day in your (y/e/c) eyes. "I'm not sure I can do this."

"You can (Y/n), and you will," Anthony's large hands clasped your shoulders as he tried to get a read on you. "I'm sorry about last night." You could hear the sorrow in your friends voice as finally got his chance to speak.

"It's not your fault he doesn't see me," you admitted in the most defeated voice Anthony had ever heard come out of you. You weren't the type of woman to pine for a guy, especially not one that you worked with. Here you were, your heart falling to pieces at the meeting of your best friend's girlfriend.

Spinning on your heels you walked further into your room once again, looking out the window at the parking lot. "I'm never the one people see," the despair in your voice didn't go unnoticed by Anthony as you started to spiral. The tough exterior cracking under the comforting gaze of the man that has treated you like a little sister.

Anthony was never sure what to say whenever it came to you and Sebastian. Anthony knew how much you have grown to love Sebastian, he could see it in your eyes whenever you looked at his closest friend.  He also knew how Sebastian acted whenever it came to you - protective, kind and most importantly you made him soft, and that was all Anthony could want for his two closest friends but he also knew the obstacles in front of you. "You're not serious."

Looking over your shoulder your tear filled eyes met Anthony's. "It's been like this since I was a kid," your voice was strained as you clearly tried to fight back tears. "Always the best friend but never enough to be worth more." Anthony wanted to comfort you but the sound of the apartment door opening drew you both back to reality. Sebastian's laugh echoed throughout the apartment, followed up by a  woman's voice, the reason for your sudden energy change.

Taking one look down the hall towards the chaos before looking back at you. "I'll be by your side the whole time." It was a promise, and you knew he would keep it. Anthony quickly came to the realization that whatever you felt for his friend, was more than just a crush.

With a nod of the head, you and Anthony made your way to the living room where Alejandra and Sebastian were. The moment your eyes landed on the beautiful 5'5, blonde that perfectly matched Sebastian's image.

Another nail in the heart.

"Morning," you quietly greeted, cautiously moving into the room with Anthony close behind. Sebastian was quick to look at you with his signature grin but seeing it only made your smile falter.

"Good Morning (Y/n)," His voice sounded like honey as he spoke your name but it didn't matter to you at that moment. All that seemed to matter was the blonde clutching onto his arm, staring you down. You could feel the lump in your throat as you compared yourself to the older woman but knowing this was what would make Sebastian happy, you ignored it.  "I hope we didn't wake you."

Faking a laugh, you quickly denied having been asleep all this time. "Anthony thought it would be great to drag my ass out of bed," you joked, trying to mask your feelings with humor.

Anthony could see right through it as he could see your eyes clouding over, almost putting an invisible wall up between you and Sebastian. Shutting down like you did after Shawn Mendes had broken up with you, having your heart broken  for the very first time. It wasn't something any of the marvel family liked seeing, especially when it almost cost you your career the first time.

"Mackie!" Sebastian nearly yelled as he finally took notice of his other friend, and from where Anthony stood he could see that Alejandra did not like that. The nerves were written across Sebastian's face as he attempted to introduce his closest friends to his...blonde. "I know I threw this on you at the last minute last night but -"

"That's because I wasn't sure if I would be coming," the woman finally spoke, her innocent smile fading into a smirk as her hazel eyes connected with your (y/e/c). You weren't one to be intimidated but the way she looked at you reminded you just how insignificant you really were. Her tanned arm wrapped around her man. "But then Bastian mentioned you were going to be here and I just couldn't resist not meeting you," her eyes darted over to Sebastian before falling back on you. "After hearing so much about you, it was necessary."

You were screwed and everyone but Sebastian knew it. So you did what you did best, you ignored the issue