It Was Always You - Sebastian Stan x Reader

4. B: And I'm so furious at you for making me feel this way.

Anthony had managed to get you into the kitchen and onto a barstool. His concerned gaze burned a hole into the hood that was pulled up over your head - an article of clothing he knew didn't belong to you. All you could think about was how true Alejandra's statement was. As much as you wanted to believe that you were better than her, you weren't. Especially the part where you went completely psycho on her boyfriend.

"What's going on here (Y/n)?" Sebastian questioned from behind you causing you to nearly jump out of your skin but because of the anger still simmering below the surface you managed to remain still.

"You're not my dad Mr. Stan," you didn't bother to look at him, still too upset to look at him. When you noticed Anthony raise his eyebrow you couldn't help but chuckle. "Neither are you chocolatino." The two interactions were night and day, Sebastian knew right away. His heart clenched at the distance you were putting him at.

"He's got a point," Anthony admitted his voice low as he tried to keep the conversation between the three of you - leaning onto the island as he tried to dodge your hurt expression. You asked for help, not an ambush. "But he was a complete dickhat for how he tried to make it."

"Wait - what?" Sebastian asked, confused at how his best friend could call him a dickhat. Anyone who knew Sebastian knew that he was anything but a dickhat.

"(Y/n), you took off late last night and told us you would be back. Sebastian waited up all night for you because he thought something was off about your explanation," Anthony started, finally gathering his thoughts when the front door to the apartment slammed - signaling that they were alone.

Anthony couldn't go down this road again. Especially not when they would end up hurting other people in the process. "When I woke up Sebastian was the one to tell me you hadn't come back yet.  No one had heard from you. How do you think we felt?"

Guilt had slowly started to set in as the reality of your actions had started to set in. You were reckless, just like every tabloid said in 2016. "I'm sorry." It was the first words you had said in a while, and they were genuine. "I needed a break." It was all you could offer without baring your soul.

"We get more than that sweetheart," hearing Sebastian use the same pet name for you that he had used for his girlfriend turned your stomach. You finally snapped.

"STOP WITH THE MIXED SIGNALS AND STOP WITH THE PET NAMES!" You yelled, turning around to face the Romanian man. Your wall had fallen and everything was on display for him to see as your emotions got the best of you.

"(Y/n), I-"

"You spent the last 73 days flirting with me, calling me pet names, complimenting me, and then you had the audacity to introduce me to your girlfriend." Your eyes burned from how much crying you've done in the last 20 minutes. "If you see me as a kid, then treat me like you treat Tom and the other young cast mates. Just stop making me feel special."

Everything finally made sense to Sebastian and he knew what to do. Anthony had managed to flee from the conversation once he realized he was no longer needed.  "You're right."

You froze, you weren't expecting that. "What?" Maybe you were starting to feel the effects of the alcohol again.

"I was flirting with you," Sebastian admitted, cautiously watching for your reaction. "Maybe I was wrong to do those things but I admit to doing them, but I will never admit to seeing you as a kid. I don't flirt with kids."

"Then what was the point of it if you had been hiding Alejandra from me the whole time." There it was, clear as day and he wouldn't believe that he never noticed it before. You weren't mad at him, he had broken your heart and didn't even see it.

"I'm 16 years older than you, I didn't think it would ever go further." Sebastian wanted to slap himself, because even to him it sounded bad.

"Just lead on the young naive actress, yeah?" You couldn't help it, being cynical and sarcastic was the only way you knew to protect your already fragile heart.

"No - (Y/n), sweet cheeks," the pet name rolled off his tongue so easily. "I didn't think you would want me. You have so many other appropriate options, Tom for example, has been begging you to let him take you on a date," Sebastian explained slowly walking towards you, needing to be near you.

"That's my decision to make," you whispered, feeling small now that he was standing next to you. Eager to look anywhere but at him, you found interest in the pattern of the floor.

"What do you want, sweet cheeks?" His voice was low and husky, and that forced you to look up at him - your surprise driving your actions. Tears still glistened in your eyes as you parted your lips, wanting so bad to tell him but fear weighing heavily on your mind. "If I let you make that decision, what would you want?"

The second time he asked the question gave you enough encouragement to take a leap of faith. "I don't flirt with just anyone - " you started finally looking into his steel blue eyes. "I spent 3 years of my life being made a fool out of by Canada's golden boy, I can't handle that kind of humiliation again. I nearly lost everything because I screwed up when I lost him." You knew you were rambling but everything you said felt necessary. "I mean he publicly cheated on me with Hailey Baldwin and I stayed. So when I say I want you, Sebastian, you need to know how honest I'm being."

"I spent years agonizing over what I did wrong with Shawn, but the last three months you made me stop Sebba," you thought you didn't want to bare your soul, but for him you realize you would do anything. "I get why he was so drawn to Camila now. I get why he couldn't fight the way he felt...because you've ruined my life by not being mine just like he was ruining hers." You were paraphrasing the words Camila had written you - trying her best to warn you about their 'official' relationship announcement. You were mad at her for trying to excuse her behavior for moving in on a man that was already spoken for but in a pathetic way you understood what she was trying to say.

Looking down at you Sebastian allowed himself to be completely honest - knowing how half truths have turned out. "You've ruined my life too," the words came tumbling out of him and the second you heard them you couldn't help but laugh. "God, dragă - you have no idea how crazy in love with you I am."

"Did you just?" You were questioning him before you could help yourself.

Ignoring you, he reached out to cup your face, his thumb brushing against your jawline making you weak at the knees. "I want this, I want you," he said, his eyes flickering to your lips. Just like that you caved, moving into his warmth because you needed it. In an instant your insecurities went out the window as his lips collided with yours - in your first unscripted kiss.

It was desperate and sloppy, all tongue and teeth as the dam finally broke. You were lost in the taste of him, something you always wanted to explore. You quit smoking two years ago because you hated going outside in the cold, so to learn that he tasted of cigarettes was thrilling in a way - but that wasn't all there was. You could taste red wine you assumed was from the night before and the hint of something nutty.

When you pulled away, you were breathless; you couldn't bring yourself to open your eyes in fear that the kiss was a dream. Your fears completely dissipated as his voice rumbled through the silence, breathless but husky. "You taste like whiskey," at first you were going to apologize but you were cut off by him pressing another kiss to your swollen lips. This one, much more controlled than the last. "I love it," He mumbled when he pulled away again, resting his forehead against yours.

Time seemed to pass you by and then reality set in. There was a reason you had fallen in love with Sebastian, and that was because he could proudly say he never cheated on a significant other...or at least that was before you. "This can't happen again until you straighten things out with Alejandra," You finally whispered, looking up into your soulmate's eyes. "I refuse to let it go any further without knowing that you're fully mine."

It was the least he could do, so with a groan he reluctantly let you go. Sluggishly moving because he didn't want to leave your side but Sebastian knew you were right. He needed to end things with Alejandra because it's what you deserved and it's what she deserved - even if she had said some despicable things.