Variation - W.M.

Chapter 39 - December 13, 2016

"Why have you been avoiding me?"

A midday intervention came from Wanda while I was making my way to the kitchen for lunch after I showered.

"What are you talking about?" I asked the woman, cocking my head to the side.

I knew exactly what she was talking about. She was talking about the way I refused to look her in the eye and the way I found an excuse to never be alone with her.

"You always pretend you don't hear when I ask you something and you stay far away from me" Wanda said and I grimaced. I forgot I did that too.

"If I'm doing that it's not been for too long" I said, eyeing my hands. Another lie. I had started avoiding her after the movie night, convincing myself that the less I saw of her the better my feelings would get.

I was wrong.

"It's been since Wednesday" Wanda corrected, watching me carefully.

"Maybe it's because I feel like you don't want to be seen with me" I grumbled, trying to slip past her. She blocked my way, shooting me a confused look.

"What do you mean?"

I shrugged, biting my lip and looking down at the floor. "You go out of your way to make sure you aren't seen after you spend the night in my room."

Wanda sighed. "I just do not want people to get the wrong idea. I do not mind being seen with you but if people saw us in bed together like we are they may believe something is happening."

I bit my lip. Would it be so bad if there was something going on? I wanted to ask her but I kept my thoughts to myself, simply nodding.

"It is more than that, because even before you didn't avoid me."

I shifted anxiously. What was I supposed to tell her? 'So sorry but I have a stupid ass crush on you and every time I'm around you I have this desperate urge to be touching you and I want to kiss you so bad it hurts so avoiding you seemed like the easiest way to solve it'?

"You did it again you know" Wanda said softly, breaking me out of my thoughts. I raised a brow at her and she reached a hand out to tap my temple. "You blocked me out."

I bit my lip and nodded. "I know." I had slowly but surely shut off more and more of my mind, the thoughts of her running rampantly until they completely took over.

"Why?"

I shrugged, picking at my nails. The witch in front of me sighed, cupping my face with a hand and forcing my eyes to meet hers.

"Please tell me what I did wrong."

I melted into her touch, the warmth from her hand combatting the slight cold of the hallway. "You didn't do anything wrong."

She furrowed her brows in confusion and I bit my lip, taking a breath as I looked down at my feet, shuffling a little. "I like you, Wanda."

"What?"

I felt her hand leave my face and I could feel my brain desperately searching for a way to rectify the situation, convince her that I meant something else.

But I was so done with holding onto feelings that never went anywhere; retaining a delusion that maybe it would work out.

So instead I brought my head up and met her eyes. "I like you. In a romantic, I care about you, my heart beats faster when I look into your eyes way. I've been avoiding you because when I'm around you I can't help but watch everything you do and realize how cute or sweet you are. I blocked my brain off because I never stop thinking about how I want to see you smile so big your nose scrunches or how much I enjoyed waking up next to you and how much I want that to happen every day. How much I want you every day."

My voice petered out at the end, the last words coming out barely above a whisper. Wanda stayed silent, her eyes wide as she tried to process what I had said.

"Miss Maximoff, Ollie," JARVIS called from the ceiling after a few moments, breaking the silence.

"One second robot" I said, glancing up before my eyes locked with Wanda's once more. Her eyes continued to flicker between mine, her hands stilled by her sides.

"Can you please say something?" I pleaded, my heart clenching as far too much time went by, crossing over into the realm of answers I didn't want to hear.

"I..." Wanda tried, her voice rough, sending involuntary shivers down my spine.

"Ms. Romanoff is on her way back and requests your presence in the conference room in twenty minutes" the compound's AI announced and I nodded, taking a step back.

"We should, uh, probably go."

"Ollie, I-"

"It's okay, Wanda. I'm going to assume that this was a rejection" I chuckled, pausing a little in a last ditch hope that she would disagree with me. She didn't. I smiled tightly and shrugged. "It's okay, I'm a big girl. I'll live. But Nat is coming back so I'll meet you in the conference room."

Another small pause. Nothing.

I slipped past the witch and changed my original destination, heading for the conference room. I had no desire to sit and wallow in my room; there would be plenty of time for that later.

It wasn't like I hadn't expected this, but with each step I took away from the brunette the silence grew louder; each step she didn't call out sending another prick against my heart until I turned the corner and breathed out, tears pushing past my eyes and down my face.

"You okay?" I heard Pietro ask, catching me in the hall and I nodded, smiling tearily at him.

"I'll tell you later."