My Answer is You

7. Time to Go Home

The last bell rings loudly just as the thundering sounds of chairs moving and shoes squeaking and people talking echoes throughout the hallways.

I heavily exhale in relief. I'm so glad this stupid school day is finally over!

I stuff my notebook and binder in my backpack and sit up from my chair. Lisa looks up at me and smiles. "Ah, its finally the end of the day! That class sure was exhausting, huh?"

I stare at her, thinking of a response. Instead of making a sound come out of my mouth, I simply nod at Lisa like the awkward freak I am. She probably thinks I'm one of those kids that can't speak--a mute kid.

I just can't seem to tell what her train of thoughts were after I gave her my response, it was weird. It was kind of as if she knows I am trying my best to read her. But every time I try doing that, I'm the one that gets all figured out in the end.

There's just something about this girl that I can't quite grasp. Its not a warm, fuzzy feeling either, but its a little more on the eerie and repulsive side.

Maybe I'm just overthinking it too much. I mean, I can't be this stupid, can I? I'm being treated nicely for the first time in a long time, and I'm thinking of this simple and thoughtful interaction as a foreshadow to my demise. How ungrateful of me.

Argh. I really do hate myself.

I reach for my backpack that is attached to the back of my seat. I take hold of the straps of my backpack, and—

Ouch!

A piercing pain erupts from my wrist and I audibly wince. Then, I proceed to ignore the pain. I grab my backpack and I sling it on my left shoulder.

I really hope Lisa didn't notice anything. I don't want her showering me with questions.

Lisa takes notice of the whole thing and she shoots up from her chair. "Hey, what was that? Are you alright? How's your wrist?"

I become very still at the 'how's your wrist?' part. I hang my head low.

Full panic mode is activated.

"Fine," I mutter. I stop before I say anything else. Now I feel terrible, and I've gotta admit that it was a little rude to snap at Lisa like that, considering how she was only being concerned for me.

I look her straight in the eye and repeat myself in a lighter tone. "It's fine. Thanks for your conc-cern," I idiotically stutter. I force a little tug on the corners of my mouth. Another sad attempt of a smile. Please just drop it, please just drop it, my mind was screaming.

Miraculously, Lisa was convinced. I'm not sure if she's just playing along or if she's actually this gullible. It's a little stupid, not gonna lie. But if it worked, it worked.

Lisa grins. "Glad you're okay! If you need any help with anything, I'm only a look to your right away!"

I feel my cheeks take a slight tinge with pink--I am flabbergasted. Why does this girl care so much about my wellbeing? Who is she? I think to myself.

Lisa grabs her backpack and then playfully bumps her shoulder against mine. "Let's go. We don't wanna miss our rides, do we?"

I shake my head. Weirdly enough, I hadn't even intended to respond quickly to what Lisa said. For some reason, my body decided to move on its own—if you even understand what I'm talking about. Lisa walks out of the classroom and calls out to me, "I'll see you tomorrow, Pam!"

Pam? Was I just given a nickname? One that isn't insulting? I'm just standing here in total surprise as the rest of the students in my class chats and walks out. I notice from the corner of my eye Mack, too, walking away from his seat. When he walks past me, oh, how it struck me! The smell of his cologne is something I would smell forever.