Boss Complex

20. Women's Intuition

Victoria knew immediately that Yifan's threats had come to pass with action, the moment she stepped into the closet. As familiar as a white line scar, the smell assaulted her senses with a ferociousness that left her rooted in place. Tao had stumbled in late, showered and come straight to bed and she hadn't thought anything of it when he crawled in next to her. The restless night of bad dreams about Zhoumi were chalked up to a side affect of her previous rendez-vouz with Yifan. But perhaps the nightmares were linked to the linger of this pungent smell. She looks over her shoulder at the still sleeping man on the bed, his bare shoulders look tanned and pretty in the morning light, his breathing even and calm in his blissful slumber. She reaches for his clothes basket and withdraws the button down from the day before, a collarless white cotton with a pleated front. She knew before she moved, but she felt it in her bones and followed through with bringing the shirt to her nose. Drakkar noir. The 1980's men's cologne that tucked her in at night.

The smell that breathed life into her when she was a high school student in the 90's. This cologne that she knew so well, was also one that Yifan would know. She drops the shirt back in the basket and races into the bathroom, opening her medicine cabinet to look through the bottles of his facial cream, his styling gel, his bottles of cologne. But there was no Drakkar there. Her dark hair a mess falling from her sleep-worn bun, her silk robe slipped off one shoulder and open, still tied around her waist, she pants as she tries to get her anxiety under control. He had weaseled his way into her boyfriend's life and now he was going to gut her with this passive aggressive game. Using Tao against her was really as low as it gets, in her book. He pushed himself once more to being a total slime ball and she hated him for it, especially because she was too embarrassed to admit that she wanted to smell this cologne more... and more... Tao so reminds her of Zhoumi when he wants to but he doesn't even know about the long complicated tale of her past love. He only knows the face of the handsome man from pictures.

She cups her hands to her cheeks as she flushes with embarrassment. How could she think about him like this? How can she still be thinking about Zhoumi when her boyfriend is lying in the next room?

And staring at her reflection, she wishes desperately, as she seldom allows herself to do... She watches her breasts heave in the confines of her pastel blue lace bra, feels her breathing getting heavier and heavier. She closes her eyes to turn from her reflection and wishes he would melt her away so that she could disappear from this world too. Then, with her eyes wide open, she still allows herself to dream that Zhoumi comes to her, reaching out his hand, fingers twining together, and they would leave together into the afterlife where they would at last be free to be with one another... Free to be in love... But that is a darkness that she didn't address. Silent wishes she left tucked away... unspoken nightmare pleas that echo in her ears "Take me with you..."

She spins too quickly and fumbles with the faucet handle. Icy water. She splashes her face with the tap water, successfully stunning her senses into submission. She shivers as drops slip from her chin to wet her exposed skin in heavy droplets. Her efforts of blocking out the darkness, the rage, his intentions... She would talk to Yifan. The bastard. She would demand that he leave Tao alone and if he must take a hostage, she begged that he take her instead. Let her live this hell if she must. Because the life she built was a mask for the hell that was living at all when the man she loved of Drakkar Noir is long gone without her.

Victoria could still recall the moment she last spoke to him, him standing at a payphone.

"I'm going to do it, Victoria. I'm finally doing it all. I'm going to be with you and we're going to have it all. Just give me a few months to get things lined up. I am going to be there for you this time..."

The phone sounded full of static, marking their distance like it was mapping out the streets that separated them. But the words he so earnestly confessed left her mouth dry.