Boss Complex

42. New World

Park Chanyeol wakes in the morning at 5 past 5. He immediately excuses himself from his bedroom, leaving his still sleeping wife twisted in their sheets. He takes a shower and styles his ink black hair in the still fogged mirror with a navy blue plastic comb. With only a towel around his waist, he moves back to his room and opens up the french doors to his walk in closet. Their new home together is two floors with 5 rooms. A much smaller version of the luxury mansion his parents lived in. His home is closer to downtown and filled with heavy oil paintings and expensive drapes on the small windows. An excess in every corner, a house with no heart. The people who work for him are always busy with their bustling from room to room, he wasn't sure why he needed a house so big that cost more than it was worth trying to keep it clean on a daily basis. Rooms that collected dust from emptiness, he's paying people to touch things in these unseen crevices and for that, he almost held envy. He wished that he could be that person. The person who was seeing things that normally go unseen... one particularly unseen person in fact. He sits at the head of a table, one that was built for seating 8, alone. He takes his coffee with a slice of toast, his tablet on the table top, open to the newspaper, reading up on local and international finance and foreign policy updates since the evening prior. Three short weeks into marriage and here he is, sitting at his breakfast table as though he'd done just this, hundreds of times before.

And maybe he had. Maybe in a past life, he met the same fate and maybe he followed this same sad trend in every lifetime and would keep it followed as such for years to come. After all, the contrived nature of his first love could be no cosmic accident. This was a star crossed tragedy from the start, and had he the presence of mind to read those constellations before he reached for the brightest star, he may have saved himself the agony of forever looking up at the light he once called his own.

He takes a bite into his toast, dry with little butter and washes it down with coffee. He no longer uses jellies or marmalades at breakfast. They're too sweet or too sticky, and both sweetness and stickiness leave his mouth salivating for someone he could no longer taste. With a linger at the table after eating, he folds his napkin in half and tosses it down when he's finished catching crumbs, standing and waltzing from the room without making a move to clean up the plates left behind. He accepts a red bull at the door as he departs for work.

"Please, Mr. Park. Please try to rest some today. You've been running on caffeine for weeks." The woman at the door says, the head maid of the house, older and stern with little affection in her tone.

Though she bows her head, he seldom felt respected by her.

"I sleep." He rebuts but both know it's a lie and they let the exchange fall off once more without resolution.

This too is all part of a grander routine, a new design of fate.

One that he starts over again every morning, restlessly fighting off the anxiety of touching the sweat from the shared body heat at his side through the night, followed by rigorously showering unable to shake the feeling of unease and filth. He hates being covered in someone else's bed breath and sweat. Someone that he likes well enough but doesn't like nearly enough, not like... But he doesn't complain. It's not her fault after all that he only has taste for her brother's salted skin.

Baekhyun hooks thin fingers into the waistband of his underwear and tugs the cotton down over his hips, folding it into a triangle and tucking it into the provided woven basket. Standing completely nude in the dressing room, he reaches for his towel and walks to the mirror. His deep, dark roots are showing now, and his long torso on his short body is caught, pale and smooth in the vanity lighting. He runs his fingertips down the seam of his stomach where unbroken abs peek through as he sucks in and tries to appear manly. Giving up on that effort, he saunters to the sliding door and steps into the shower room of the hot spring, walking to the shower head and turning it on without testing it. He knew it would run ice cold at first and he wanted that shock to his system. The splatter of cool water jolts him from any thoughts he may be trying to access in his memory bank and keeps him focussed on being unfocused.

He wasn't even sure why he chooses this place any more. While washing his hair, he tries to find some kind of reason behind these actions but he just comes here because he's been before and honestly, he just trusts the establishment. And anything that Victoria sets up is trustworthy in his eyes.

Even so, he might could still find a better place to go for weekend retreats. One that's closer and doesn't require heading so far out of town. And in those moments, he reluctantly admits that he's here because of that man that he despises so much. The one that he's so madly in love with, the one that betrayed him, that he was soiled by before being discarded. But that's not entirely true is it? Because it is Baekhyun that kept badgering him for more. Even when Park Chanyeol declined, it was Baekhyun who kept pushing for more and more. Chanyeol may have started this game, but it was Baekhyun who played the hardest in the end. And foolishly, tactlessly, he fell into a web of selfishness.

He was so willing to throw away his family and their security just so that he could get his rocks off with the guy he wants. He cheated on his loving boyfriend, tried to ruin the merger holding together his family business and betrayed his sister, and all for what? So that he could be with Mr. Park? Or was it all a rebellion. Was this all his way of acting out about the fact that his sister was free to run off and be irresponsible and he was roped into working at a company he hates for zero pay? Unable to properly identify it, he clears his thoughts by rinsing the shampoo from his hair under the warm spray of the shower head.

What are his plans now? Where does he move forward from here? He's been working for a month at a convenience store but he needs something with steadier hours. But is this what he's doing? For the rest of time? From now on? He's applied to places over and over but if he doesn't use his charms, he can't seem to get a job, and using his charms has always led to the kind of relationship that ends with sexual harassment.

He stands, clean as a whistle, skin glistening with the dewy glow of being freshly washed. He walks out to the hot spring and stares at the spot where Chanyeol had once been sitting. He had his eyes closed, resting there in the serenity of his miniature vacation. But Baekhyun had intruded on that too, hadn't he? Come and presented himself before the resting CEO and demanded that he stop what he's doing and pay attention to him. And is that the way it should be? Was that Baekhyun being kind? Was that any way for Baekhyun to treat him? Baekhyun steps to the edge and slowly dips a toe in, holding back a grimace at the kiss of the near scalding temperatures, pulling his attention to a sharp inhale.

He eases into the water and slowly lets it wash over him in angry waves, his skin on fire for just a moment and then numbed by the therapeutic motion. Here in the safe space, water too hot, mind starting to become hazy with the heat, he allows himself to break down and truly, deeply cry. And when he claws back out of the water... his tears dry with his regained composure. The ladies no longer accept his payments at the door when leaving. They said that no other guests but the ones who sign up for extended stays come and go as frequently as he does. They even go so far as to offer him a job these days, but he politely declines. Something about the prospect of having to face his demons on the daily, sounded way too stressful.

Sitting on the soft blue velvet train's seat, heading back into town after his retreat, Baekhyun opens his folder and pulls out THE DOG brand stationary and begins writing a letter.

Soo,

How is Seoul without me? Boring, right I knew you'd regret losing me from your social calendar. Don't worry. I'm coming home soon. Because I miss you. Actually, I miss both of you guys. You and Jongin, and even Becky, Tao and Junmyeon and sometimes when I don't have anybody to admit it to other than you, I also miss my brother-in-law. But I'm working on it. Working on trying to forget. But I don't want to forget it all. I want to be back in Korea, Kyungsoo. I want to be back at my old job, back in my room... I know this is because I'm really just a teenager who's past their expiration date. But I want to be better, Kyungsoo. Please. Please don't forget about me. You are my family.

Love, Baekhyun

He touches the letters on the page with his finger tip, strokking gently over the names of the people he loves so much... people he respects, and those that mean the world to him. Rereading the note, Baekhyun crumples the page and stuffs it into his bag, pulling out a fresh sheet to start over again.

Kyungsoo,

Japan is so nice this time of year. New job again, not nearly as much fun as my last few jobs. Question: Do you think I would be a good addition at a host club? How are you and Kim Jongin by the way? I worry about you crazy kids! I'm hoping to come back to Korea for a visit again soon. I'll write again soon!

Baekhyun