Boss Complex

63. Complicated Simplicity

Kim Jongin would never admit that he loved Do Kyungsoo to his family. This was never from a place of shame on his behalf. He would tell anyone who would care to listen, and many of those that could not give a half second of care in the world regarding the subject. He didn't even care if his family found out from others who've been told about the subject. Jongin would not give them the satisfaction of hearing him confess love to anyone in this world because as far as he's concerned they were people who did not know love, and never would. While Mr. Do had blamed Kyungsoo's long standing relationship with Baekhyun as the cause of this corruption on his son's part, Mrs. Do seemed relieved that her son was able to finally live in the open.

Love is not so simplistic a topic that Jongin could fathom explaining to his parents how deep his feelings run. He told his parents that he's seeing a man, that he planned on spending his life at this man's side, but he had no desire to elaborate further, wasting precious breaths that could be spend in gasps between kisses with Kyungsoo. Love isn't meant to be understood and comprehended fully. It is not something that you spend days and months and years analyzing into books and tv specials. He cared not about the psychology of why he loved the little man or what it was about that moment that he first saw him with his jealous pout that made him desperate to find out more.

No. None of it matters. What matters is only that he cannot imagine a start or finish to when his heart began to obey the will of someone else's emotional stability. He would always, only, know this feeling. Even in time, if Kyungsoo left him and found someone else. There would always be this point of comparison, the way that he felt, longing for Kyungsoo to pout with his bottom lip stuck out, eyes narrowed, looking at him in jealousy as he did to Baekhyun the first they met.

He no longer narrowed the words to being tamed in "love." He adored the man, yearned for him, desperately and irreversibly, he was entranced and enslaved to the moody boy who rarely gave in to what he truly wants in life. He's too vain, too concerned with how others see him, too uptight while still being wildly out of control. He's a storm raging, tiring and perplexing and Jongin wished to be rained on and twisted up into the cyclone of those mood swings forevermore.

In the midst of violent storms he found peace and clarity standing the in the eye of it all, wrapped in his arms. Unsure of where they were going to end up when the downpour halts, their immovable feelings and stubborn pride kept them in a seesaw of give and take, a dance he could keep up for the rest of his life. He'd dated women, he'd been with another man, and there was no comparison to how he feels now. Every person that he's been with, every moment he's spent in the time leading up to the very moment that he lay eyes on the moody man that fills his life has been a step in the right direction.

"Jongin... where are you?"

Kyungsoo rolls over in bed, his tee shirt clad shoulder sloped and tender in the way he adores, looking feminine and soft in comparison to his masculine forearms that hold him hostage for hours on end.

"I'm here." He breathes, lying back in their bed, pulling the man into his chest with a hard scrape against the fully threaded, soft sheets.

His lover turns to him stroking his jaw and smiling softly.

"I had a dream about you again." He breathes before sinking back into sleep, comfortable and confident.

He knows that Jongin is going nowhere, and somehow, even though it's mostly a gut instinct, mostly it's just a feeling, he's sure somehow that Kyungsoo feels the same. He's not going anywhere. He gives small tender moments of reassurance and in those moments, in a soft touch or a certain look. It's beautiful, perfect. He adores the way he makes him feel. And the words of love that Kyungsoo offers him, sparsely but confidently. This is the way it always will be.