Dear Me, I'm Pouring Back Into You

Evie aka Lou's Angel Goddess

"Aye Tre'Maine. If I decided to take that next step and pursue Evie, would you have a problem with it?"

"Listen man, it would hurt me but I'm not going to stop you or her from being happy. I want you to promise me that you won't hurt her, spend time with her, give her the space she needs and keep her deep in God. I promise you, I won't be a problem, nor will I stop you two from being happy. "

Dear God

I come to you

Asking for your forgiveness

Repenting in dust and ashes

Believing in Jesus as my Lord and Savior

I've struggled with letting go

Dark thoughts and depression consumed my soul

I just want to be free

Rescue me from my sins

I want you to enter my life

Change me and bring me closer to you

I choose to live for you and serve you all the days of my life

Whoever and whatever you have for me, I trust you

In Jesus Name I pray

Amen.

We made acquaintance at party

Music was bumpin'

Connected from across the room

Didn't know she would come through

I approached her and gave her my name

I told her they called me Tre

But she called me "TreMaine"

She had the body of a goddess

An angel in disguise

Her melanin complimented her body

I couldn't believe my eyes

She was perfect from head to toe

Told her that I never been on this side of town before

She wondered if this area was familiar to me

She was working on her Master's Degree

We exchanged social medias

First started with Instagram

Getting her number I know would be in God's Plan

Conversations in the dm's transmuted to phone calls

I wanted her to be my girlfriend

Wasn't in no rush at all

Wrote her a poem and she said I was prolific

It would be saved and framed

So I printed it and it was gifted

Her smile lit up the world that her pearly whites blocked the sun

She was such a vibe

I knew that we'd have a lot of fun

Late night conversations turned into falling asleep on the phone

She didn't want to be without me

I couldn't leave her alone

Watched on FaceTime as she worshiped God

For bringing her a mighty long way

And getting me this far

Distance was a factor but we made it work

Evie gave me the gift of peace

I reminded her of her worth

Summer turned into fall

We got closer

Asked her out three times

I was becoming more bolder

Her best friend Jada said to her to give me a chance

So when Evie said yes

I thanked and praised God in advance

She was the girl of my dreams

Wanted her home for the holidays

Evie was craving me

And I was craving her in every way

She gave me her heart to hold

I told her she can always stay

Everything good started to fade

And suddenly go away

I made her an idol and that wasn't keen

We went from being in love

To Evie saying she doesn't want me

Out of sight and out of mind

She didn't let me apologize and make it right

Evie gave up

When I still had a lot more to fight for us

She did her dirt but I still gave her grace

Till she decided to kiss my friend in my face

That wounded my heart

I was shook to the very core

Asked God to help me and for Him to take control

Made excuses and thinking she'll come back

Concluded I meant nothing to her

I gave her space and wanted my heart to be her home

Now Evie has me blocked in her phone...

"Your request cannot be completed as dialed

Please try again later; message 88088"

"TreMaine! TreMaine! I know you see me calling you! Listen. I'm sorry that it has to be like this, but this is what's best for you and I right now. You won't understand now, but you will eventually. I'm sorry for all the hurt I did to you. This is why you should've listened to me when I told you that I wasn't fully ready to be with you. I do love you. You're a great guy. You're just not the guy for me. And I KNOW YOU NOT OUT HERE SLANDERING MY NAME!

"EVIE! EVIE! WHO ARE YOU TALKING TO AND RAISING YOUR VOICE AT IN MY HOUSE?"

"DAD I'M TALKING TO TREMAINE."

"TREMAINE? THAT'S A GREAT MAN RIGHT THERE. LET ME GET THE PHONE. WHAT'S GOING ON BETWEEN THE TWO OF YOU? I THOUGHT YOU GUYS WERE STILL TOGETHER?"

"DAD, WE BROKE UP. I HURT HIM. I DIDN'T TELL YOU I WAS UNFAITHFUL TO HIM AND YES IT WAS WRONG, BUT HE'S OUT HERE BEING DRAMATIC AND PLUS IT'S ON VOICEMAIL BECAUSE I BLOCKED HIM SO I CAN MOVE ON. HE'S SLANDERING MY NAME TO MY FUTURE MAN AND I REALLY LIKE HIM; BUT I CAN'T MOVE ON WITHOUT TRE'MAINE IN THE WAY. I TOLD HIM TO LOSE HIS FEELINGS FOR ME AND BE A POETRY FRIEND AND HE'S BEHAVING LIKE THIS! I DON'T WANT HIM. "

TREMAINE. SON LISTEN, I SAY THIS TO YOU AS A MAN OF GOD AND A PARENT, AS MUCH AS I DO LIKE YOU, I NEED YOU TO LEAVE MY EVIE ALONE. SHE WON'T BE YOUR WIFE. YOU WON'T SLEEP WITH HER. KEEP YOUR EYES OFF OF HER. I KNOW SHE HURT YOU BUT YOUR WIFE IS COMING. EVIE DOES OWE YOU AN APOLOGY BUT AFTER THIS, YOU NEED TO MOVE ON AND MOVE FORWARD SON.

"Tre'Maine. When the time comes, we can one day have a friendship that's healthier. Until then, accept this boundary between us. We must disconnect. I know you hate me, but one day, you'll thank me for it. You are loved. I appreciate you. I'm sorry. I love you. Goodbye."

To Be Continued