Blue Billy

Chapter Eleven This is where I leave you.

Chapter Eleven - This is where I leave you

Steve was quiet most of the way home; I waved Robin off as she hopped out of the car, and I moved to the front seat. "Why's your boyfriend not taking you home?" Steve spoke, not looking my way and playing with his hair. I shrug. "I think my Dad said something to him, so he thought it is best you take me home." Steve scoffs and laughs. I look at him, waiting for him to speak. "What?" I question when he says nothing. "You, your unbelievable." he turns to face me, looking between me and the road " I don't know if I can do this, Y/n."

"Do what, Steve?"

"This. Drive you home when you would rather be with Billy, and what have him sit at our table? are you going to be friends with Carol and Tommy now? Because got to tell you, it's not as fun as it looks."

I frown, looking at him, raising my voice at his stern and cold change in character. "What are you talking about, Steve? of course not; they are his friends. I'm just making an effort, and I thought you and Billy were fine now. You don't have to love him, but I don't know. I thought maybe we could all.."

"Be friends?" Steve laughs. 

"Yeah, is that such a bad thing" my voice lowers. "I know his been a dick to you; I know that, but". Steve interrupts, "his, changed his different now?" Steve nods, taunting, his hands gripping the steering wheel.

It's an uncomfortable silence for a while. "He's not sitting at our table" Steve half looks at me. I roll my eyes. "Is this how it's going to be, Jesus Steve what are you going to make me choose him or you? type of bullshit."

Steve turns into my driveway and asks, "If I was, who would you choose"?

"Your not serious, Steve; come on", I have my fingers clasped on the door handle.

"No, but hypothetically" Steve looks at me, not taking his eyes away. I don't say anything; I look at him. 

"It's Billy, isn't it?" he says.

He turns away, looking at my house through the windscreen.

I open the door and step out, leaning back in. "You choose Nancy, so", I slam the door, and Steve steps out of the car catching up with me "what, I choose Nancy when?"

I stop in my tracks. "Your not serious, Steve; you don't remember when I told you I liked you, and you chose Nancy and then, to be a cherry on top, stopped hanging out with me completely." I walk away, heading up my front porch steps, when his hand grabs my arm. 

"I know; I'm sorry; you know how stupid I was back then," I sigh, tired of fighting, saying empty words and getting nowhere. 

"What do you want me to do, Steve."

"I don't know", he steps down the step. "I just can't be around you and him, alright, I can't do it." 

"So that's it then," I ask, a tremble in my voice. "Just know I didn't choose anyone Steve; okay, you're my friend, and Billy's my boyfriend; why can't it be that simple?"

Steve walks up one step, meeting me. "You know it's not that simple."

"Why?" I say barely above a whisper.

Steve's eyes dart around my face before he looks down; he shakes his head and steps back without saying anything. He walks towards his car. "Steve! I call out as I follow him to his car. I stand in his way, blocking him from getting inside it. 

"Why?" I ask again. He leans on his car door, looking down and shaking his head I move closer to him; I'm not letting this go.

When I step closer to him, he looks up "Steve just tell me.. why?" he doesn't answer his eyes linger on my lips, and then his hands grab my face pulling me in when his lips touch mine, I lean into it, lost in the moment but not for long.

I push him back, and his eyes grow wide. "No, Steve, no, that's not fair." I step back, and he follows. 

"Y/n, I'm sorry", I refuse to hear him out. 

"I loved you, Steve, I fucking loved you, but It's too late, okay. It's been too late for a while." I storm off towards my house, and he rushes to catch up. 

"Billy's, not his not good Y/n, his not good for you", Steve tries to get in my head. I turn around, angry now.

"How do you know what's good for me, Steve?" Then he says It... something I used to wish he would say, something I waited years for. "Because I love you. Alright, Y/n, I'm in love with you," I laugh, throwing my hands by my side, and he looks at me confused.

"No, you don't" I shake my head and walk right up to him; he looks like a scared little boy. "You don't love me, you just miss that I'm not trying to win you any more that I'm not there now every time your lonely or bored or dumped by Nancy or Jennifer or Kate." My eyes roll as I say their names. Steve shakes his head. 

"That's not true, Y/n. I know you still love me; I know you do." 

I shrug "yeah, I do, Steve, but not like I love Billy... not anymore."

"Steve steps away. "I can't do this, then be around you with him I can't." He looks away from me, walks towards his car, and opens the door.

"Why I did.." he turns back around.

" I was there with you and Nancy. I never said anything; hell, I was actually happy for you both. That's all I wanted, Steve was for you to be happy."

"That's bullshit, Y/n!" Steve slams his car door, walking up to me.

"You were hoping we would break up. Don't act like your better than me; you waited on the side lines this whole time, and you're just pissed because I won't do that for you, not when It's Billy I'm competing against. It's not worth it!"

Tears well in my eyes that all too familiar sting. "I think you should go."

"Gladly", Steve gets in his car, and dust flies as he speedily reverses out of the driveway.