A Million Girl Kisses

Chapter 4

      "So, Gia, what are you doing out here? Besides smoking, of course. Those things will kill you, you know."

     She exhales, smoke coming out with her breath. "I feel like it's important to make the most of the life you have, instead of hiding from everything." I ponder this. "I mean, I'm still not going to jeopardize my health by smoking, but you make a good point. Now, stop deflecting and tell me what you're doing out here. My guess is you're not here just to smoke."

     She chuckles. "I mean, it's not some fascinating story or anything. I just come out here to think sometimes."

     My curiosity gets the best of me. "And what are you thinking about today?"

     "Nothing... just needed to get away from all the... people."

     "Oh-" I reply, stepping away from her. "If you want me to go, that's totally fine. I'll just-"

     "No. You don't count."

     "Wow... that's an... um... an odd way of putting it," I reply. "Sorry," She says, face falling. "I just meant that... you don't seem like the rest of the people at this school. Well, in the ways that count."

     I grin. "In that case, thank you. I think."

     "Sorry. Again. I don't want to speak ill of your friends or anything. It's just that sometimes they can be a little..."

     "Much?"

     She laughs. "Pretty much. I, uh, didn't realize you felt that way about your friends." 

     I sigh. "Yeah, I, uh, I just feel like they aren't very... down to Earth. You know what I mean? Well, of course you do, that's what you were just saying." I cringe. "I'm so sorry. I'm annoying. And not in a pick-me way. Oh, wow, I should just stop talking."

      I make a move to leave, again, when her hand grasps my arm, holding me in place. "Don't go. You're not annoying. And even if you are, I like it. It's a good kind of annoying." 

     My shoulders relax a little. "I'm not usually like this," I say. "Yeah," She replies. "I figured." She says it jokingly, but there's a sadness in her eyes. As soon as it came, however, it's gone and she's back to her cigarette.

     After that, we just sort of... talk. She tells me about the photography album she's working on, and I tell her about the book I'm currently reading. No one ever seems to listen when I talk about books, so I just don't most of the time. But Gia is so attentive, she even tosses her cigarette on the ground, stamping it with her foot.

     I'm just about to tell her about the third-act break-up in the romance book I'm reading when the bell rings, reminding us it's time for our next class. "Wow, I can't believe we talked for the whole break," I remark, grabbing my phone to check the time. "Well, I guess this is it," She grabs my phone out of my back pocket. I'm about to protest when she hands it back to me, a new contact page open. "That's my number. Call me. Or text me. Or... don't. I just... really liked talking to you, Zoe." 

     My name on her lips isn't like when Melissa or Emma or Austin address me. This is different. It's marvelous. Thrilling. Wait. What am I talking about? It's just my name, for God's sake.

"Thanks, I... I will." I wave goodbye to her and make my way back to the school building. As soon as I'm back at my locker, it hits me.

What the hell am I doing?

Resources

Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386

Trevorspace: https://www.trevorspace.org/

Kids Help Phone: 1-800-668-6868

***author's note

Hey guys!!! Thank you all SO. SO. Much for reading about Zoe and Gia! I hope you're enjoying, and note that I would love to hear any feedback you have! 

     Thank you so much for 112 reads, and even though it's not a lot, it means a lot to me. I hope you guys tag along for the rest of Zoe and Gia's story! 

Hugs and kisses,

Cora van Eyk