Love to Hate You

I Hate Love Songs

"Should 'limp dick' be hyphenated?" Gareth asked, making Jeff laugh. I paused my writing and pointed at him.

"Not fucking funny," I snapped before going back to finish my main message on the locker. This made them laugh harder as they finished writing hateful things about me. I stepped back to admire my work. I hoped she would understand my code.

"Stinky?" Jeff asked. I flushed and shrugged.

"It's an inside joke," I replied, not wanting to tell Jeff about the nickname I missed. He raised an eyebrow at me, wanting to question me more until he was interrupted.

"Incoming!" Dustin yelled from his post in the hallway. I had asked him to stand guard for us and warn us if he saw any teachers. As soon as he called out to us, we all ran to the Hellfire room, wanting to avoid questions from teachers who would not understand why I was writing those things about myself.

"I think this is cool that you did this, man," Jeff said, clapping me on the back. "It's weird seeing you be this romantic."

I blushed and shrugged. It was weird being this romantic, but Victoria was worth it. I just hoped she would like it.

"So, what's next?" Dustin asked, setting his hands on his hips. I took a deep breath and shoved my hands in my pockets.

"Robin's going to tell her to meet me at the diner. So, hopefully, she shows up," I answered meekly. He grinned at me.

"So rad," he said, looking between Gareth and Jeff. Gareth grinned and ruffled his hair, making Dustin scrunch his face. I felt my heart pound – I really hoped this was going to work.

---

"You sure you don't want anything else?" the friendly waitress asked. I shook my head and didn't look at her.

"No, thank you," I answered quickly. I felt her stare at me and tried willing her away with my thoughts. She finally left, and I was left with my racing thoughts.

What if this wasn't enough? It wouldn't be enough – nothing could ever be enough. But I was desperate for her to give me a second chance. I missed her – it was wild how enamored I had become of her in the short time we had done whatever we did. I wanted to explore it further, wanted to make sure she wanted to explore it. I wanted to hold her hand and kiss her. I wanted to make her laugh again. I wanted to give her hickeys until her neck was one bruise.

I shook my head. I was strung out.

I glanced around and tried to calm my nerves. Robin was supposed to tell her to meet me here, but I wouldn't know until she got here. If she chose to come. God, this sucked. If she didn't show up, I was never going to forgive myself. I groaned and threw my hands on the table, burying my face in my arms. This was terrible.

"You know, someone wrote some mean things about you on the lockers," someone said. I shot up and tried to play it cool.

"Really? That's weird," I replied as Victoria slid into the seat in front of me. She looked great – all smiles and curls, in a pretty sundress. I scanned her neck – the hickeys I had given her were fading. I hoped I would be able to fix it.

"I know – can you believe someone did that to the both of us?" she asked, turning her head to the side. I smiled and shrugged.

"I can't say I don't deserve it," I answered. She smiled. "Did you agree with it?"

"I'd never call you stupid, Munson," she said, making me smile wider. "There was something about you being stinky, though, which I can't say is wrong."

I blushed and looked down at my hands. I missed her saying that. I can't believe I missed her saying that.

"I'm glad you don't think I'm dumb," I replied. "I am pretty dumb for letting you go."

I looked up and her eyes were soft, and she was smiling at me. She placed her hands on the table and waited for me to say something. I reached out for hand and felt my heart pick up when she didn't move away from me. I took it in mine and squeezed it.

"I'm sorry, Vic," I said. She nodded.

"Thanks, Eddie," she answered. I felt my mouth dry.

"I want to prove to you that I mean all of this," I started, my heart pounding in my ears. "And I hate that you think I would torture you with this. I want you to be my girl and I need you to know that I'm in this."

"I know that now," she answered. I felt my chest swell and grinned.

"So, you want to be my girl?"

"I'd like that," she said, smiling and blushing. I wanted to leap over the table and kiss her. But we had one more thing to do. I slid the chocolate shake I ordered in front of her. She eyed it, confused. I pushed it towards her.

"You need to pour this on my head first," I explained. She started laughing and shook her head.

"I'm not doing that, stinky," she replied. I loved that nickname now. I loved how she looked at me. She needed to do this.

"You have to," I insisted, pushing it closer to her. "I'm in this, Vic. And I deserve it."

"No, Eddie—"

"Remember you promised to be extra mean?" I reminded her. She scoffed and rolled her eyes. She took it from me and watched me for a minute.

"If I do this, you have to stop beating yourself up," she ordered. I smiled and nodded at her, watching her as she stood. She came over to my side of the booth and leaned close to my face. "I've missed you."

I felt my heart pounding in my ears and my mouth dried as I nodded at her, forgetting any words. She got closer to my face and my heart flipped. I desperately hoped she would kiss me. I attempted to close the distance but was brought out of my daze as the freezing cold milkshake was dumped on my head. I was gasping for air, shocked by how cold it was. She grinned at me.

"That was fun," she said. I took a deep breath and smiled at her before grabbing the back of her neck and pulling her into a kiss. She shrieked with laughter as I rubbed my face over hers, getting her just as sticky as me.

"Victoria, again?" someone bellowed. We were brought out of our bubble by Victoria's old manager.

"Oh, no, Morty, this is different—"

"How is this different?" he shouted at her. I felt a flash of anger.

"Dude, chill out, I told her to do this," I explained. This further confused him – he looked like he was short circuiting. Victoria stood.

"We'll go, Morty," she said, taking my hand. She took my hand! In public! We weren't hiding anymore!

I followed her out of the diner and took her in my arms, turning her to me. She grinned at me.

"You're a mess, stinky," she said, trying to help me get some of the milkshake out of my hair. I leaned in to kiss her again.

"I don't care anymore," I said, kissing her between each word. I started moving down her neck and she laughed.

"Munson, you're getting it all over me," she giggled. She didn't pull away from me, though, and I continued to kiss her as much as I could.

"Gross," someone said. I glanced over and watched Robin walk in, pulling her apron on.

"Oh, as if you didn't orchestrate this, Buckley," Victoria quipped. Robin smiled at us as she walked by. I kept my arm around Victoria and Robin poked my side.

"Nice job, Munson," she said. She continued to walk into the diner before calling over her shoulder. "Glad you finally listened to me!"

I blushed – Robin was right. I had been such a chicken shit, too in my head about everything. I looked down at Victoria. She was beaming at me, and it made my heart catch.

"Looks like you'll actually have to shower, stinky," she said. My jaw dropped and I scoffed.

"You're such an asshole," I admonished. She smiled wider and got close to me.

"Takes one to know one," she whispered before closing the distance. I kissed her hard and deeply, never wanting to stop.