45| The Letter Box

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Amanda's POV:

To say my nerves and anxiety are all over the place and at their highest, would be the understatement of the century.

After Bryan left our room, my shaking hands remove the lid to the letter box. I am first in awe at how many envelopes, cards, folded sheets of notebook paper, scraps or post-it notes the box contains. Wow daddy! It seems you were in a hurry to give me as much fatherly advice as possible before...Opal whimpers in my head. I know, Opal. I whisper to her in my head. I take a few deep breaths and dig in.

Many of the cards represent sweet milestones he knew he would miss: birthdays, holidays, graduations...both of them...like he knew I was going to college at the age of nine. I am teary-eyed for most of them simply because he wasn't there to celebrate those moments with me and mom.

The scraps of paper and post-it's mostly covered the advice that apparently would hit him at random times, so he had to write them down on whatever paper was near by. He has so many great one-liners:

Blood isn't always family. Find your people and secure your circle.

Everyone has bad days, so be the friend willing to just be there.

Actions speak louder than words so always be observant because people will show you who they truly are.

Trust your instincts, they are there for a reason.

Love can be a double-edged sword that sinks in deep and leaves you to bleed so love moderately.

Determine your non-negotiables so you know what you stand for...otherwise people will continuously cross your boundaries without your permission.

Set your boundaries and know exactly what you expect from others.

If you find your person, nurture the bond and it will entangle itself to a strength unbreakable.

Be you, regardless of your flaws, mistakes, or circumstances.

Find your center and balance in nature and your powers will grow.

The last one makes me smile as he never knew I was, in fact, an elemental or that I would have a werewolf mate who was forced to turn me into one. Ever since these sides of my existence have surfaced, my appreciation for nature has grown exponentially. The cool breezes through the tall pines bring with it a symphony of alluring scents only nature knows how to make. I think back to Bryan's secret spot. The overwhelming beauty and serenity of it. Natural, untouched, untainted, perfection. My dad would have loved it as much as I do.

I take a small break to go to the bathroom, splash some water on my face, and grab more tissues before climbing back into bed. I have a feeling the letters are going to be much more intimate and emotional as these would be his final words to me.

I feel my control slipping on my emotions, but I am able to reign them in by meditating and doing my breathing exercises before opening the first letter. This will be my first true test of facing my turmoil and maintaining control. I have to be ready as war is already coming to our doorstep and the key to my success is remaining in control and using my powers to defeat the enemy. I take a few deep breathes and unfold the first letter.

It feels as if I've been here forever. Time stops. I'm brought to a different time and place as I imagine my father hunched at his desk writing these letters as my mother, unaware, is peacefully sleeping upstairs.

I already know I will read these letters again and again and again. They will be my connection to my father's memory. His legacy. By the 3rd letter, tears are flowing freely down my face like waterfalls spilling over the edge of a cliff and crashing back into the earth's crust. I feel Opal pushing positive vibes and comforting purrs toward me and it makes me feel less loneliness and despair. I look into the box and realize there's only one letter left. I gulp as this realization hits me. His final letter.

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