After the storm [Finished]

17- Fall in

Philip guided me to the living room, we sat down and I tried to understand, or better said, try to guess what was going on. I could feel Philip's eyes on me for a while but my mind was busy with another thing.

"I know I don't have a proper relationship with Ryan at all but..." I looked at Philip. "Can I have at least a glance of what's going on?" He nodded.

"Today, four years ago, Alex died. I think Ryan is not over it yet but I'm not sure. He doesn't talk about this with anyone. He sometimes mentioned Alex but it's weird. At this time of the year, he gets especially sensible and mentions him every time he gets drunk".

"That's why you asked me if he mentioned his ex that day".

"Yeah". We kept silent for a while. "I can tell that you like him... And sorry, but I don't think he's ok to be with someone yet".

Yeah, Philip was right. I liked Ryan; I liked him an awful lot. But I kept my distance because I didn't know how to face the situation properly.

"I have to go... are you ok?", Philip asked.

"Yeah, don't worry".

I followed him to the apartment's door. We exchanged some words and Philip left.

It's not like there was a lot to process; there was just one thing. But it was an important one. I sat in the living room and thought about what Philip had just said and some things Ryan said in the past months. I felt like everything fitted a bit better: some behaviors, some conversations. I thought about Ryan calling his ex-boyfriend next door and my chest tightened.

The next day, I woke up with a weird view. Ryan was sleeping in my bed. I couldn't remember the moment he got in; I knew I went to sleep alone.

I kept watching him for a while. I loved his eyebrows. They were a bit thick and squared. It amazed me every time I saw his skin carefully; it was so clean and smooth. No one could be wrong if called his face pretty.

I was placing a lock of his hair behind his ear when I felt my phone vibrating on the night table. I flipped to the other side and picked it up; it was my mother. I put it on silent mode and left it back where it was.

"Are you not picking up?", asked Ryan with a hoarse voice. I turned to him and saw him half-awake.

"Nope". I stared at his sleepy face, it was so cute.

"You never pick up the phone when your mother's calling".

"'Cause I don't want to talk with her. She's probably going to ask me to go home for Thanksgiving".

"Why are you not going?

"Hm..." I tried to think of a way to not give him too much information but it was quite difficult. He usually didn't ask for personal stuff either so I took the chance to share a bit with him. I wanted us to come closer. "You know that I'm into arts", he nodded. "Well, in my family, everybody studied medicine. I'm like the black sheep. And I always get compared with my older sister. She studied medicine, graduated with honors, got a job in a well-known hospital, got married, and has her own family at her 32 years".

"Is she not getting a mental breakdown?" He giggled. "I bet she hasn't lived a shit. You're doing well, you're doing what you love". He patted my head.

"Thank you". I laughed. What was with him? "I'll get scolded if I go this year though, my mom loved Mike".

"Really? My mom always scolds me to invite some girl, no matter who she is". He kept in silence a minute. "Let's make a deal".

"What do you have in mind?"