I'm still hurting - Sally Face (agere)

-10-

I finally had my own room. I locked the door, and that was the most powerful feeling.

 I turned around and walked towards my bed, investigating all of the little creatures lying on top of it.  a bunny, A dog, a little chicken, and Noodle of course right on
top. Those were just the ones on my bed a shelf hung to the wall behind me on the shelf were cute little bears and multiple hello kitty stuffed animals. They were cute and sweet looking at them made me feel almost content. I suppose it was an interesting feeling. I don't feel like that often. I'm surprised that Janis and Ray thought that I would even like them, the blankets were also really me, they were big and soft and fluffy. They were like the bigger versions of the little one I carry with me

As I looked around I noticed my emptied-out bags folded underneath the bed. I quickly opened up the dresser drawers and there were all of my clothes, folded neatly and organized. On top of the dresser was the prettiest painted jewelry box. One side was pastel pink and had pretty little strawberries and the other had the Sanity Falls logo on it. It was perfect, it was me. I turned it upside down and saw it was initaled L.J., I slightly smiled to myself opening it up. My jewelry from my bag was in here but so were a few other things, they each had little notes explaining where they came from and who got them, Todd had gotten me this gorgeous bracelet made of emerald and obsidian. The note that was left was visibly in neater handwriting. 'Ace, I'm really glad to have you as part of the family. My parents just love you and I do too. Thank you for letting us love you.'
tears threatened to flood my eyes as i placed the note back down and slid on the bracelet. I continued to look at all of my new things.
A little caddy hung by the door, It had a black folded towel over the top. My name was sewn into the bottom, Astrid Morrison. again with a little note saying if I didn't like it they could change it to my legal last name or remove the last name altogether.

 I loved it actually. 

Just underneath the towel were strawberry body wash, shampoo, conditioner, face scrub and body scrub, and some face washes. I wonder what's with all of the pink cutesy strawberry stuff. all my clothes and jewelry and all of the external stuff were dark and gothic but all the things that people will never see like my sheets and my shower stuff and other things were all cute. It feels like me, this whole thing just feels so right,

I walk over to the little desk in the corner and I grab the cute notebook with little cows on it and open it up. the inside just has my name written on it. I pick up the next notebook, black with band stickers covering the front, the inside cover says 'Aces songs'. Hmm, It seems like Larry is pushing me to write again.

The only thing left to look at is the little closet but it was locked.

I do a little spin and fall back onto the soft bed. I look up at the ceiling and admire the tapestries and posters surrounding it and the walls. The little soft lights sprinkled throughout the room.  It was comfortable and peaceful.
I turn towards the wall and wrap myself in the fluffy weighted blanket and fall asleep.

water, salt, warm sand,
I'm dreaming of the ocean. The only thing I could possibly long for now.

-

(This is kind of the vibe I'm thinking, dark and comfortable but I'm leaving it open for interpretation.)